(Clearwisdom.net)
1. Returning from a lost land
My husband and I were fortunate to obtain Falun Dafa in 1998. My husband had cirrhosis of the liver and was in critical condition even after medical treatment in a hospital. He and I began practicing Falun Dafa together, and in less than two months the incurable disease that had tormented my husband for five years disappeared, and his health completely recovered.
However, after July 20, 1999, since we did not firmly believe in Master and Dafa, we did not step forward to validate and peacefully appeal for Dafa when Dafa was being attacked. Because we lacked a cultivation environment, we gradually began to behave like everyday people. We only took from Dafa but did not sacrifice for Dafa. Several years later, between spring and summer of 2006, my husband's cirrhosis recurred and he died within less than two months. I had two daughters, the younger of them only one year old. I was faced with a big challenge: I had to choose to resume practicing Falun Dafa or miss the opportunity forever.
I looked back at myself and pondered this matter for several days. Finally I decided to resume my cultivation in Dafa. Master had not given up on me, and fellow practitioners had not given up on me. After I had studied the Fa with a calm and clear mind for a while, fellow practitioners also brought me the Dafa articles written by Master and other "Minghui Weekly" publications that I had never read before to help me catch up. After I finished reading them, I found the answers to many problems that had confused me before and grasped them clearly. At that time, I enlightened that we, as Dafa disciples during the Fa-rectification period, should be genuine Dafa disciples to assist Master in Fa-Rectification, since sentient beings have only practitioners as their last hope of being saved and Master has bestowed upon us the most splendid glories in the whole cosmos, something that has never occurred before.
The reason my husband died was that we had walked the path arranged by the old forces. The evil old forces took advantage of our attachment of fear and reinforced and magnified it. As a result, they interfered with our cultivation and made it so my husband could not cultivate anymore. They only wanted to make us fall so they could destroy us. I should surely negate all the arrangements by the old forces, study the Fa, cultivate my heart, do the three things well, and strive forward courageously and diligently on the path of Fa-Rectification cultivation.
2. Triumph over the setback
I resumed cultivation in Falun Dafa in 2006. Soon after that, Minghui Weekly published the news of joining the morning group exercises. Master granted us another chance for group exercises depsite the evil environment. At the very beginning, I couldn't get up early enough to do the morning exercises; sometimes I could, while other times I couldn't. I felt so regretful afterwards; however, I still couldn't get up on time. I realized that demons were interfering with me because they didn't want me to do the exercises. If I had the attachment of being lazy, then they were going to reinforce and magnify it so that I couldn't do the exercises.
After I enlightened to that, I was determined to break through my laziness. In my mind, I reinforced my righteous thoughts of breaking through that shortcoming. Even before I went to bed, I focused on this righteous thought again and again. Perhaps Master saw my firm heart because I woke up at the right time so that I could get up and do the exercises.
Once when I was doing Exercise Two, Holding the Law Wheel, I suddenly felt that my arms were too heavy to hold above my head. I felt very faint, like I was going to fall down. I just felt like going to bed to sleep. I suddenly enlightened that it was interference, so I sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate the evil factors that were interfering with me. The "sickness" that interfered with me was arranged by the dark minions and rotten demons. How could I admit this? I began to send forth righteous thoughts and only two minutes later, the "sickness" disappeared. I was sweating all over but I continued the exercises without a pause.
I realized that if I admitted the "sickness" and went to sleep instead of sending forth righteous thoughts to eliminate it, the result wouldn't be positive. Master said in Zhuan Falun that "Good or evil comes from a person's spontaneous thought, and the thought at that moment can bring about different consequences." ("Upgrading Xinxing" in Lecture Four) I had deeper understanding of this Fa.
3. Hold firmly to divine, righteous thoughts, and get rid of human notions
After I thoroughly studied the Fa, I had the urge to step forward and validate Dafa, save sentient beings, and completely fulfill my solemn, historical vows. At the very beginning, since I lived in a rural area and there were no other Falun Dafa practitioners in my village, I had to validate Dafa all by myself. Because of this, I had a little bit of attachment to fear. My elder child had left the village for schooling, but my younger daughter was only two years old.
If I went out in the evening, I worried about my children. I had to work in the daytime, so the only available time for me to validate Dafa was in the evening. All those human notions kept me from validating Dafa so that I didn't do it earlier. In order to overcome those human notions, I spent a lot of time studying the Fa. Later on, I gradually realized that my perspective in thinking about these problems only focused on myself, and that was exactly the selfishness of the old cosmos. The factors that we should get rid of during our cultivation are all just selfishness from the old cosmos. How can we be enlightened beings in the new cosmos if we cannot get rid of selfishness? We should strive to become righteous beings who are selfless and always put others first, as Master expects of us. However, I still had human notions and thus my righteous thoughts were limited by human attachments and notions. I knew I had to get rid of them. So I studied the Fa more and more and sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate the bad matter from the human notions. Finally I came forward and validated Dafa.
Before I distributed materials, I sent forth righteous thoughts and asked Master to strengthen me in eliminating interference and all evil factors that interfered with saving sentient beings. At the very beginning, I distributed truth-clarification materials in the nearby rural areas. Later on, I walked three or four miles to surrounding villages to distribute materials. Sometimes when I was walking along the small paths through the mountain, it was very dark and there weren't many residents in those areas; however, I didn't feel scared at all. I felt that my whole body was light. I knew that as long as we behave ourselves according to the requirements of Dafa, Master's Fashen take care of every one of us, and righteous deities are safeguarding us, too.
"Compassion can harmonize Heaven and Earth, ushering in spring
Righteous thoughts can save the people in this world"
("The Fa Rectifies the Cosmos" from Hong Yin II).
Let's diligently strive forward together, get rid of human notions, and have divine righteous thoughts. The above is only my cultivation understanding. Please point out anything improper. Let's share experiences and accomplish the great historic responsibility of assisting Master in rectifying the Fa.