A School Teacher in Belgium Shares Her Cultivation Experiences
(Clearwisdom.net) Greetings Master, greetings fellow practitioners.
Validating the Fa
Before I practiced Falun Dafa, I was always concerned about how people thought and felt about me. If they reacted positively, I felt good about myself and thus my ego grew. The goal of my existence seemed to revolve around being liked and accepted by everyone. Looking back, I realized that my only purpose at that time was to validate myself and feed my ego.
Master has talked many times about the importance of Dafa disciples validating the Fa:
"So during this period, especially since this is the period where Dafa disciples are validating the Fa while Fa-rectification is taking place, the requirements for this group of cultivators are especially high. Since these cultivators are here while Fa-rectification is taking place, they shoulder a lot and their responsibilities are great."("Teaching the Fa in Canada, 2006")
During my first year of cultivation, however, I was not clear on this issue.
I also fundamentally changed my way of thinking.
Master said in Lunyu:
"In order to explore this domain, humankind must fundamentally change its conventional thinking. Otherwise, the truth of the universe will forever remain a mystery to humankind, and everyday people will forever crawl within the boundary delimited by their own ignorance."
My current understanding is that I should cultivate every action and thought I have, being truly aware of them at all times so that I can assimilate and be responsible to the Fa. Validating the Fa is validating "Zhen, Shan, Ren."
We are all Fa-Rectification period Dafa disciples. When the meaning of Fa-rectification became clearer to me, I was able to start doing better the three things that Master asked us to do - studying the Fa, clarifying the truth, and sending forth righteous thoughts. Master's lectures beginning from 1999 helped me to clearly understand the meaning of Fa-rectification. We are here to help Master validate the Fa, and thus help Master save sentient beings. Master has already given us many things to enable us to cultivate to return back home. I feel grateful to Master and I feel a huge responsibility to Fa-rectification. Many times I have wondered, "How can I save sentient beings?"
Clarifying the Truth
I am a teacher at a secondary school. Last year, I realized that I should clarify the truth to my students. I first talked about what Falun Dafa is, and then I talked about the persecution. We also watched the film "Sandstorm." Afterwards, the pupils had to answer some questions about the film and then we had a classroom discussion. One advantage of having the students write things down is that they can think in a slower and clearer way about the topic. What I didn't realize at that time was that the things the students said would reveal my attachments. For example, I asked them, "Is this persecution legal or illegal?" It never occurred to me that some of them would answer, "It is legal because the political leader of the CCP [Chinese Communist Party] started the persecution and the other communists [party members] approved of it." This exposed my attachment to fear. I was afraid that people would think, "Oh, she's doing something illegal." Also, when people are deluded by the wicked CCP's lies, it's very important to clarify the truth further. I thus clarified the truth in a deeper manner to the students so that they could get rid of their warped notions about politics and the CCP.
What helped me before I clarified the truth was asking myself, "Why am I doing this?" And my answer was to save these people, and to help them eliminate the rigid notions that the evil CCP put into their minds.
I would like to share an experience about delivering The Epoch Times (Dajiyuan) to several Chinese restaurants on my way home after Fa-study. I always pass by a big, posh Chinese restaurant, but had never delivered the newspaper there before. Last week I wanted to leave a newspaper at the restaurant, but it was closed and I couldn't find a letter box. Yesterday, although the restaurant was closed, I saw some lights were still on in the back of the restaurant. I parked my car and walked around the building to try to find a place to put the newspapers, but couldn't. However, I had a thought, "I will leave one in a proper place even if I have to search for a long time." At that moment, a young Chinese man opened the front door and came outside. I explained to him about the newspaper. The man asked me, "But who are you and why do you give this to me?" I told him that I am a Falun Gong practitioner and then I clarified the truth. At first he acted a bit strange. I could feel he was brainwashed by the Chinese Communist Party. I asked him, "Is it ok if I deliver this newspaper here every week?" He said that he couldn't read Chinese, but he would give it to his parents. I replied, "I will come back to ask your parents at a proper time." Then he smiled and said, "Thank you."
I think that all the Chinese people that practitioners come across are longing to hear the truth about Falun Gong. If we don't tell them, maybe they will never again have a chance to learn the truth and therefore might not be saved. On the surface they may seem uninterested, but in their hearts, they are waiting to learn the truth.
Studying and Reading the Fa
Last summer, I told myself that I would read one chapter of Zhuan Falun each day. However, for the last few months, I haven't been diligent enough. Sometimes I would only read a few pages. As a result, I become lazy in doing the three things. Only after meeting with other practitioners at Dafa activities or at group Fa-study would I become more diligent and clearheaded. I enlightened to a principle that studying the Fa is not a formality that should be carried out each day just for the sake of doing it. We study the Fa every day because it establishes our entire cultivation path.
I have also experienced that if I study the Fa when my heart isn't calm or have all sorts of pursuits, then I do not enlighten to anything. However, when I read the Fa with a calm heart and without pursuit, its true inner meanings are revealed at my level of understanding. It is as though I am suddenly able to understand words or sentences that I had never really grasped before.
Master said in "Melt into the Fa" from Essentials for Further Advancement:
"As a student, if his mind is filled with nothing but Dafa, this person is definitely a genuine cultivator. So you must have a clear understanding on the matter of studying the Fa. Reading the books more and studying the books more is the key to truly elevating yourself. To put it more simply, as long as you read Dafa, you are changing; as long as you read Dafa, you are elevating."
If I don't do the three things well, then I experience more interference and am not clearheaded. As a result, I waste a lot of time doing ordinary people's things.
Children Eagerly Want to Learn the Fa
I have three children. I have always felt that they came into this world and into my life for a special reason. I got pregnant with my oldest son when I just finished my studies. My understanding is that they chose me as their mother because they also want to learn the Fa and return to their homes. Last year, my then 7-year-old son and I read Zhuan Falun together. I noticed that he found it quite easy to understand Master's words. From time to time he rephrased Master's words during the reading. After we finished reading Zhuan Falun, I understood the importance of reading the Fa to my children and reading together.
I had another experience with my son, at a store. One day while shopping with him, I saw an elderly Chinese couple in the shop. I thought to myself, "I should tell them 'Falun Dafa is good, Falun Dafa hao'." But then I got scared. I told this to my son and he immediately said, "It's the old forces that make you scared." I was perplexed. I had only told him once about the evil, old forces a long time ago. I was still afraid and didn't talk to the Chinese couple. As I stood at the cashier I thought, "If they come and stand behind us, I will tell them." It's a big store with many cashiers. After a short time they came and stood in line behind me. So I said to them, "Do you know Falun Gong?" The older lady acted as if she didn't understand me. Then I said, "Falun Gong is very good. Falun Dafa hao." Immediately their faces became bright and they smiled. When I was about to leave, they nodded at me, smiled and said, "Goodbye." Chinese people are waiting to learn the truth, although you can't tell from the surface. Clarifying the truth to them is really saving them. When I think of this story now, I shouldn't set rules on how I clarify the truth to people, like I did back then. I am aware of my attachment to fear, but I no longer recognize it as a part of me, although it can still manifest itself when I am not diligent.
I would like to end my sharing with a poem from Master. I sometimes recite it when I am amidst tribulations. It gives me a lot of strength to carry on.
On Reading Weathering the Storm
Born into a sphere of suffering
Man struggles just to survive
One day, behold, the Great Law gained
Cease not your steps on the path of return
This is my personal understanding. Please kindly point out anything inappropriate.