Removing the Attachment of Self-Blame
(Clearwisdom.net) When I do something well, I often feel as though I have achieved something. On the other hand, when I do something poorly, or when others criticize my shortcomings, I feel guilty. Consequently, I sometimes felt depressed with a strong attachment to self-blame.
After I started practicing Falun Dafa, I fell into the habit of blaming myself from time to time. I often blamed myself and could not get out of the habit, either because I unconsciously hurt others by what I said, because I didn't pass a test or tribulation well, or because I felt it was my fault when others refused to make the “three withdrawals” (to quit the Chinese Communist Party, the Communist Youth League, and the Young Pioneers). Actually, the attachment to self-blame was a cover for many attachments such as competitiveness, showing off, jealousy, etc.
I knew that this state of mind was not correct, so I began to dig out the roots of this attachment. In the process I found the manifestation of attachments to reputation, interests, and sentimentality in my thoughts. On the path of cultivation, it played a negative role. Fellow practitioners who have walked crooked paths should pay special attention to the harm resulting from such an attachment.
Today when I studied again Teacher's Fa,
“I don’t like it when you blame yourselves, it’s completely pointless. I’ll just repeat what I said: If you’ve fallen don’t just lie there, get up right away! ” (“Fa-Lecture During the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference”)
I was enlightened to the fact that Teacher has enabled us to remove our attachments to self-blame, which is an ordinary attachment. Yet, in the past I only regarded this as Teacher's encouragement for us to walk well the path of future cultivation.
Self-blame is of no use at all. The key is that we walk well our future path. Let's clearly recognize the pointlessness of self-blame and remove it.