(Clearwisdom.net) Greetings, Master and greetings, fellow Dafa practitioners.
I was born in Philadelphia, PA, in November 1946. After high school I went to college in Hartford, Connecticut, and spent some time as a Coast Guard Reserve. I met my wife in 1969 and we married the next year. We have since raised three sons and we all live in a small community north of San Diego, California. My oldest son, his wife, and their daughter, our only grandchild, have a home just around the corner from our home. My second son lives just a few miles away with his wife. My youngest son is 19 and lives at home with my wife and me.
This is the American dream come true, right? But these kinds of dreams can be misleading. Under this exterior life style was a person who hungered to find answers to these kinds of questions:
- Is this life all there is?
- What is the purpose of life in the universe?
- Where did I come from?
- What does the future hold for all sentient beings in heaven and on earth?
- If there is a God as I have always believed, why does He allow evil to exist at all?
I knew that answers to these kinds of questions could only come from a God. Finding answers to these kinds of questions takes patience and perseverance.
When I met my wife back in 1969 I was young and eager to get on with life but even then I was looking for answers to these questions. In that year I began studying the Bible. I read the Bible many times and even though I found great truths therein. I also found many questions unanswered. I continued to study the Bible. In time, I was appointed an "elder" in the church. An elder in this particular church is equivalent to a minister or pastor or priest in other churches. As an elder I took on many responsibilities including counseling, teaching, and speaking at large conventions. My serving as an elder and yet continuing to question things caused many conflicts.
So, in 1994 I resigned as an elder and began looking outside the realms of Christianity. Although I was no longer a "practicing" Christian, I knew I had to maintain a high moral standing in this life to prepare myself for what was to come next. I prayed for help and kept searching. My journey finding the Fa continued.
In 1994, my oldest son married but my other sons were still living at home with my wife and me. The youngest was very young at that time and my wife was busy with her film business. The only person I could talk to was my middle son. We talked about everything. At the time, he began studying Chinese cultural and traditional Chinese Martial Arts. Although I didn't understand his fascination with these things, I remained open and curious from a distance. What I didn't realize was that my son's quest into Chinese spiritual disciplines played a significant role in our pathway to finding the Fa. Time passed.
In 2003 my search continued but for my son, his search ended. He used to make regular visits to libraries and bookstores. One evening while browsing the shelves at Barnes and Noble he came across the book that changed our lives forever; Zhuan Falun. He read it cover to cover in just two days. He soon found out where local Dafa practitioners taught the five exercises he had read about in the book Falun Gong. He then attended local Fa study groups and learned of the persecution and the call to come to New York to a Fa Conference. When he heard Master Li "might" be there, he made plans to attend in late 2003.
After hearing Master lecture for over five hours, my son felt compelled to share what he had heard with his wife and the rest of the family, including me. But I was still dragging my feet. It wasn't that I wasn't interested; after all, it was I who began this quest for finding greater truths. Rather, it was just that the Truths I was reading were so profound that my heart was not quite right to accept it yet. I had many attachments: business, family, and life in general. But he patiently kept showing forbearance, leaving me flyers and printouts to read. He then asked me to try to start reading Zhuan Falun. By then it was mid to late 2005. Little by little, I began to read about the Fa.
My son then invited me and the rest of the family to attend the 2006 Chinese New Year Global Gala in Escondido, CA. It was an amazing experience. A few weeks later he invited me to attend the Western U.S. International Fa Conference in LA on February 26, 2006. Before I attended the conference he suggested I complete reading Zhuan Falun. I was still dragging my feet.
As the Fa Conference in Los Angeles approached, I began really reading and studying Zhuan Falun daily. And although I had a difficult time understanding Master's words in the beginning, I was overwhelmed and awestruck. I felt moved deeply and my mind was lifted to high levels I couldn't imagine before. I finished reading Zhuan Falun the night before the conference.
When I walked into the lecture hall at the Fa conference I immediately felt uplifted and yet calm. At exactly 8:55 a.m. the entire room immediately silenced and everyone seemed to be praying and meditating with their eyes closed. It was my first experience with sending forth righteous thoughts.
Justin leaned over to me and said, "Dad, I'll tell you more about this later."
Then for hours I heard experiences from all over the world. I was transfixed on the speakers, listening to every word as if my life depended on it. That afternoon something wondrous happened. Master appeared as if out of thin air. I thought to myself, "Where did he come from?" The previous speaker stopped immediately and welcomed Him right away and Master sat down and began speaking for hours. I sat on the edge of my seat the entire lecture; it seemed like only minutes.
Although I couldn't understand a word Master was saying, by His manner and the things I heard that he was saying through the interpreter, I knew I was an eyewitness to a rare and wondrous event. I was seeing with my own human eyes for the first time a God, Buddha himself, and Master of all things of heavens and earth. My mind and body were lifted to a place I never knew existed. I wanted this day to never end. I was filled. Then it was over. Everyone around me looked totally different to me now. We were as one.
The answers to all my life-long questions were right there in my midst and the Master of all was right here on Earth. I knew then what I must do.
When I got home I began to reorganize my life to make more room for the Fa in my life and to clarify the truth of the CCP persecution going on in China I became more diligent with the three things Master taught us through the Fa. I also began associating with Dafa disciples in my area. This provided me, a Westerner, a way to help clarify the truth of the things going on in China by getting involved with The Epoch Times, distributing flyers about the persecution, and Faxing and emailing messages to Chinese people still trapped in the CCP. This helped me also to see the new journey that was lying ahead. There was much work to do.
I read many new deep truths of the universe in Zhuan Falun. I also read of interference and karmic elimination that I would experience by making a stand for the Fa against the old forces. Then it began.
Back in May 2006, I experienced karmic sickness for the first time. It last for weeks. My son continued to clarify to me that this was Master's way of helping me eliminate karma and take on virtue when I passed each of these kinds of tests, thus preparing me for the journey ahead, so I refused to take any mediation or see a doctor.
One night my nose began bleeding without any warning and wouldn't stop no matter what I did. At one point the blood looked almost solid black. Nothing like that had ever happened to me before.
I had to stuff cotton up my nose just to keep it from running everywhere. My sons both got on the phone with me and helped me send forth righteous thoughts and read Zhuan Falun with me. Within a short time the bleeding stopped. I fell asleep but the next morning the bleeding continued for a while. Then all of the sudden it stopped for good. I began feeling it clear up. It was over.
Another issue arose concerning my wife's reaction to my involvement with Falun Dafa. One night I came home from a Fa study quite late with my son. She was not pleased. In her mind, Falun Dafa was taking over my life. She feared I would leave her alone at home more and more after 37 years of marriage. The fact that my business and work often took me on business trips and occupied my time away from her in the past didn't matter to her. She saw my being a Dafa practitioner as an invasion of my dedication to her and to our previous life as Christians. I realized this was another test.
I decided to sit down with her and explain what Falun Dafa meant to me and how my whole life had lead me to this place; that it was the most important thing in the entire universe, without revealing too many deep sacred secrets of the Fa that might frighten her. I kept it simple.
I explained that in time Falun Dafa was going to make me a better person. I reminder her how much more calm I was getting; that I was no longer loosing my temper any more; how my language was getting cleaned up. I had stopped drinking alcoholic beverages and getting agitated. I attributed all these changes to Falun Dafa. I reminded her that, although we both were practicing Christians for many years, nothing really changed in our life. Only Dafa could change me.
I then explained what sending forth righteous thoughts is and how important it is to me not to be disturbed during those periods at home. I talked about leaving home for Fa study groups and occasionally Fa conferences like this one here in San Francisco. I continued to assure her that I would continue to be the best husband and provider I could be, that she had nothing to worry about me becoming a zealot and leaving her stranded or alone. I assured her I would do my best to conduct myself in a balanced way and devote quality time to her.
She said she understood my position and had no intention of trying to stop me or hindering me in any way but she just wanted to know what to expect. She said she didn't agree but was not negative on the Fa and was very upset at what was going on in China by the CCP.
Interestingly, she asked for her own copy of Zhuan Falun and said she'd read it on her terms. I also leave experience sharing articles on her desk to read on her own without talking about it. Finding and keeping that balance continues to be a cultivation issue with me.
In these past months I came to realize how critical this time period is and what a miracle it is that I am even here, thanks to Master. Master has come a long way through the cosmos over a very long period of time to prepare this way of salvation for all sentient beings, including me, to find my way back to my original position in the heavenly realms, to fulfill my original purpose, and to help save as many other sentient beings as possible before rectification comes. I came to realize that the Fa is far greater then me and my predestined relationship.
My life's journey in finding the Fa has ended, but my new journey to enlightenment and consummation has just begun.
Thank you for allowing me to share my life's story with you.
