Removing the Attachment to Validating Ourselves
I'd like to share with fellow practitioners what happened to me recently.
During my cultivation, I felt I had already gotten rid of the attachment to physical and personal interests. A few days ago, one of my mother-in-law's co-workers told me that my parents-in-law had given thousands of yuan to my husband's brother as down-payment on his house. I was very calm when I heard it. I clarified the truth to her and told her as a Falun Dafa practitioner, I wouldn't feel envious or jealous. She was moved and praised me. However, I couldn't stop thinking about it afterwards and I started having bad thoughts towards my parents-in-law. When I got home, I told my husband what I had heard. My husband isn't a practitioner. He thought it wasn't fair for my parents-in-law to do that. Then I told my co-workers what happened and they also said it was unfair, especially when I was being so nice to my parents-in-law. I just couldn't calm down. Still, in front of my parents-in-law, I tried my best not to show my true feelings.
A few days later, my mother-in-law told me that my sister-in-law wanted to visit us, but as she did not have a lot of money, she didn't want her to come this time. But, if she did come, they would give her some money. I now felt that my parents-in-law treated me very unfairly. I started to argue with them about the situation. They were very surprised and my mother-in-law began to cry. When I calmed down and remembered I was a practitioner, I realized I didn't pass the test and I then apologized to comfort them.
When we fail one test, more conflicts will come. My company was re-organized and I needed to work with quite a few new co-workers. One of them began to frequently criticize me. Nobody had treated me like that before, and I became very angry. Because of my anger, other co-workers started to criticize him too, which strengthened my bad impression of him. I got stuck in ordinary people's notions. Soon I had an argument with him and the work atmosphere became very tense. I couldn't calm down when studying the Fa, practicing the exercises, and sending forth righteous thoughts.
Remembering that I am a Dafa practitioner, I realized I had to face all these conflicts, and look inside to find out what went wrong. Teacher said:
"The Fa can break all attachments, the Fa can destroy all evil, the Fa can shatter all lies, and the Fa can strengthen righteous thoughts." ("Drive Out Interference")
I decided I needed to study the Fa with a calm heart.
When studying the Fa, I came to realize that I had never truly gotten rid of the attachment of validating myself. When validating the Fa, I was still attached to myself and tried to change other people based on my own notions in order to get recognized by others. When I couldn't achieve the results that I wanted, I felt angry and unfairly treated. I had such a strong attachment of personal pursuit. What happened to me was not accidental. Everything came about because of my attachment. What appeared to be problems with other people, were reflections of my attachment. The root cause was in me.
In other words, when we feel offended, it is because our attachments are stirred up, and brought to the surface. Essentially, it means it is time for us to let go of that attachment. Take me as an example: I thought I had little attachment to physical interests. In fact, I didn't care about small interests. However, I couldn't calm down when we talked about big money. This shows I hadn't completely got rid of the attachment to personal gain and physical belongings. When other people didn't respect me, it showed me the attachment I had to reputation. When I didn't agree with others' criticizing me, it was because I thought I was very capable and superior. It was another attachment.
We are Teacher's disciples. We are lives that were created by the Fa. We are Fa-rectification period Dafa practitioners. Gods admire us. Could there be anything that's more important than our striving forward in the Fa? When this Fa principle became clear to me, and I eliminated my notions and the evil interference, I reached the Fa requirement for me at that level. The old elements were immediately disintegrated and the environment around me became peaceful again.
When my thoughts became righteous, I found the way out of the conflicts. As long as we keep studying the Fa and following the Fa, we will be able to constantly look inside. Then we won't be interfered with. We will be able to walk down the cultivation path well until eventually we attain the righteous enlightenment of selflessness and altruism.