(Clearwisdom.net) There is a small story from my life that I want to share with fellow practitioners. Today I have written it down and discussed my own thoughts.
I am 32 this year. According to the "Marriage Law," if a couple in the countryside only has one daughter, they can acquire a permit for a second child. I always felt that as a practitioner, I didn't want to have another child. In fact, I was afraid that my cultivation would be affected. Master has said that the Fa harmonizes everything; however, I couldn't understand the Fa principles very clearly and was not able to harmonize this issue. My relatives and friends always asked me why I didn't want to have another child. (Note: In the countryside of China, most people think that boys are better than girls. If a couple doesn't have a boy, their relatives and friends would think that they haven't fulfilled their responsibilities.) In the beginning, I could find some excuses. After a while, I felt that it was hard to find anything to say about it. I was very confused about it as well. Two or three years passed by like this.
It was not until I read what Master said in "Teaching the Fa at the Conference in Vancouver, Canada in 2003" that I found the answer suddenly. Master said,
"If tomorrow is Consummation, today you still won't know it, and suppose you're thinking about opening a business, then just go ahead and do it. But I'll harmonize everything for you. Don't think about anything! Just do whatever you're supposed to do."
After all, my family members do not cultivate. What would they think of me if I did not want one more child? Through studying the Fa, I found that many of my attachments were mixed with this issue. For example, I was afraid that having another child would affect my Fa study, practice and Consummation. I was also afraid that fellow practitioners would not understand me. Digging at the root, all these thoughts came from one word: selfishness. Master tells us, "whatever you do, you should consider others first, so as to attain the righteous Enlightenment of selflessness and altruism." ("Non-Omission in Buddha Nature" in Essentials for Further Advancement). However, my thoughts and behavior deviated from the Fa.
Of course, whether one should have a child or how many children one should have are all personal matters in one's life. Depending upon each individual, each incident and many other factors, it is not possible to have a common rule for all these issues. At the same time, Dafa disciples are not everyday people and should not find excuses for these problems because of sentiment, desire for an easy life or other human attachments. The most important thing is to better validate the Fa in any given situation. During cultivation, there are no rules about an individual's lifestyle; however, if one can deal with each issue righteously, harmonize it well and not go to extremes, this will really show each practitioner's character and principles.
Master asks us to cultivate in a way that best conforms to everyday people. However, since I did not study the Fa well, I didn't know what to do once I faced problems and could not understand the principles based on the Fa. In the future, I will study the Fa more.
"Your righteous thoughts and everything you accomplish come from the Fa, so no matter how busy you are, don't neglect Fa-study."
("Teaching the Fa at the 2002 Fa Conference in Philadelphia, U.S.A.")
We should follow what Master has said, walk on the path that Master has arranged for us, not go to extremes, and follow the natural course.
Master wrote in HongYin, "Do but pursue not, often stay in the Dao." Cultivation is to cultivate our heart. I will always remember what Master has said,
"Once you go to an extreme, you will damage the path that I have arranged for you and the requirements of the Fa for you."
("Teaching the Fa at the Conference in Vancouver, Canada, in 2003")
These are my limited, personal understandings. Please benevolently correct anything that is wrong.
March 24, 2004
