(Clearwisdom.net) I am a 47-year old farm worker from Heshizhen Farm in Dazhou City, Sichuan Province. On November 27, 1998, I was introduced to Falun Gong. At the beginning, because I was of a lower educated class, it was difficult for me to understand even the surface meaning of the Fa [Law and principles; the teachings of Falun Dafa], not to mention the profound inner meanings in the Fa. I only knew that the Fa that Teacher taught us was so good that I could not live without it.

On July 20, 1999, Jiang's regime initiated the persecution of Falun Gong. Malicious lies were spread about our respected Teacher, poisoning the minds of people around the world. I was deeply bewildered and sad. How could my Teacher be slandered for teaching us to be good people? All I could do was cry in misery.

On December 24, 1999, I went to Beijing with fellow practitioners to appeal to the government. I wanted them to stop the persecution of Falun Gong. For this I was arrested and detained until February 2000 when Da County Police Department assignees took us back to our hometown, where I remained detained for another 40 days at a local detention center. During that time, the police ransacked my home and confiscated all my Dafa books. They also fined my family 10,000 yuan. The police claimed the fine was to cover the cost of having people bring me back. I heard from my family members later that one meal receipt alone was 900 yuan (about one month of my salary). In reality, on the way back from Beijing, I had eaten only three bags of instant noodles. Among the six people who went to Beijing to bring us back, only two were police officers and the other four were their relatives.

The police instructed the director of Heshizhen Farm, a person by the name of Huang, to collect the fine from my daughter, who was still a junior high school student (my husband was in the hospital at that time). My daughter cried, "You know we don't have that kind of money, my parents are not here. Where do you want me to get money?" Huang left after realizing that he was unsuccessful in his extortion attempt. But the police department insisted on being paid 10,000 yuan. Therefore, Huang was forced to pay the police with money belonging to the farm. Later the farm withheld 6,000 yuan in medical reimbursements earmarked for my husband's hospitalization. They also confiscated 2,000 yuan from our savings fund. From then on, the local police often came to my home and harassed my family.

In 2001, the Da County Police Department arrested me again, because I handed out flyers that told the truth about Falun Dafa. Three other practitioners and I were detained in a filthy detention center for over three months. Later I was transferred to the No. 2 Detention Center in Da County. I refused to cooperate when the guards interrogated me, which gave them an excuse to beat me. When they told me to kneel, I refused. They beat me even more viciously. Seeing that I did not yield to their beatings, they finally gave up. Two months later, we were transferred to the No. 1 Detention Center. We insisted on practicing the Falun Dafa exercises at the detention center even though the guards did not allow it. So they handcuffed us in a position called "carrying a sword in the back" (1). One of the guards commented that he had never seen a woman being handcuffed in this position in all the years he had worked at the detention center. But we were handcuffed like that for over twelve hours. After 13 months of illegal detention, I was sentenced to three and a half years in prison. I was sent to Jianyang Women's Prison and assigned to Brigade Three.

After I arrived in Jianyang, the prison guards demanded that I report to them, as was required of the criminal inmates. I told them that I was a Falun Dafa practitioner and not a criminal. Then, they used all sorts of torture methods to have me admit that I was a criminal. When they saw that I still refused, they hung me on a gate by handcuffs for over six hours.

Because I insisted on practicing the Falun Dafa exercises, the prison guards ordered the inmates to strap me to a bed. They used handcuffs to shackle my hands behind my back and secured them as tightly as possible. I was told, "I will make sure you won't want to live, but I won't let you die even if this is your greatest wish." Seeing me handcuffed like that for the entire night, one of my cellmates was deeply distressed and cried all night long. She knew Falun Gong practitioners were good people, but she did not dare to help me. From then on, each day the guards sent several collaborators (2) to "transform" me. These former practitioners had renounced the principles of Falun Dafa; however, they could not convince me to give up the practice, even though they were well educated and I was not. Once the guards realized that the transformation had failed, they tormented me even more. They did not allow me to study the Fa with other practitioners, and they ordered several inmates to follow me and monitor me closely. One day, one of the inmates saw that my lips were moving, so she asked if I was reciting Falun Dafa teachings. I said yes. She went to the guards and told them. One of them came over and began to belittle me and to beat me. I was again handcuffed to the bed for half a day. They tortured me inside a closed room because they were trying to maintain the appearance of being a civilized prison.

There were three of us practitioners who did not yield to the persecution. We encouraged each other, and we relied on our righteous belief in Teacher and Dafa to resist the persecution. The jail guards forced us to stand facing a wall for around 18 hours each day. During most evenings, they wanted us to write the Guarantee Statements. When we refused, they punished us by having us stand day and night for several days without rest. Inmates took turns watching us. One of them asked me quietly, "How can you put up with this? Why not write a statement and then continue to practice when you get out?" I smiled at her, "I cannot. That is not being truthful. There is nothing wrong with our striving to be good people and following our Teacher's requirements. It would be disgraceful if I admitted any guilt and wrote the Guarantee Statements. That is not even up to the standard of a righteous person, not to mention the standard of a cultivator."

After that incident, we were forced to stand for approximately 18 hours every day for three months. When the jail guards realized that they could not reach their goal by using any of the means they employed, they put us to work in the workshop. We worked about 17 hours per day. In the evenings, we were forced to write about our perception of the situation. We could only sleep after 2:00 a.m. every night. This lasted another three months.

After this, the prison guards set up brainwashing sessions. The instructors were collaborators who had given up the practice under pressure. Those people gave it their all in this brainwashing effort, in order to have their sentences reduced in return for forcing other practitioners to renounce Falun Dafa. They spread lies in the name of Falun Gong practitioners. They accused the practitioners who refused to give in of caring only about themselves. As a result, the guards and some inmates became even more hostile to those of us who were not transformed, and the guards intensified the persecution against us. We were forced to run in the full sun every day without any rest. In the evenings, over a dozen people took turns tormenting one practitioner. There were originally 27 practitioners who refused to renounce Falun Gong. Within a little over two months, half of them gave up. I felt pain in my heart. I thought to myself how hard it must be for my Teacher to save one person. Yet, I also understood that I could not let my feelings for them become an attachment. To cultivate is difficult, and to enlighten is even more difficult. One can either pass or fail each test and tribulation. It is difficult to pass the test, and only one unrighteous thought can ruin it all in the blink of an eye. From then on, I saw the evil nature of the persecution more clearly, and I became more steadfast and clear headed. Even if I could not walk out of the prison, I wouldn't yield to the evil. Once the prison guards realized that they could not change my mind, they sent me back to Brigade Three. I spent all my time working in the workshop, often until 2:00 or 3:00 in the morning, and sometimes through the entire night.

In June 2003, I was transferred to Brigade Seven. As soon as I entered the gate, I saw a fellow practitioner handcuffed to a basketball stand. One inmate told me that she had been handcuffed there for over three months because she refused to wear the prison uniform. On that day, she took off the uniform that was forcibly put on her as soon as she was released from the handcuffs, and put on her own clothes. Over a dozen inmates grabbed her and tore her clothes off. They even cut her underwear off with a pair of scissors. The jail guards took away her clothing and put the uniform back on her. She then ran to the bathroom and took it off. Several inmates saw her naked. They then dragged her to the outdoor basketball court for the guards to take pictures. They tormented her mercilessly, violently beat her, and ridiculed her. The practitioner went on a hunger strike in protest. The guards and several inmates then handcuffed her to a gate and tried to force-feed her. Since she refused to cooperate, they used an iron bar to pry her mouth open. They were not just force-feeding her, they were torturing her ruthlessly. When I heard her scream in agony, I deeply felt her suffering.

A few days later, the guards sent that practitioner to the hospital for force-feeding. A tube was inserted through her nose to her stomach while her hands were still handcuffed behind her back, and she was tied to an iron bed for three days. Meanwhile, I was locked up in another room with several inmates guarding me. For refusing to wear the prison uniform, that practitioner suffered so much, yet she did not waver in her determination. I was deeply moved. I enlightened to the fact that the uniform was for criminals. If I wore it, wasn't I admitting that I was guilty of a crime? I took off the uniform, even though I knew the consequences. But I had a fellow practitioner as a model. I was determined not to cooperate with the old force's arrangements even if I lost my life. I resolutely took the uniform off, refused to join the other inmates during prison call, and refused to report to anyone. Right after that, I was subjected to all sorts of tortures. They hurled insults at me. They said I was a fool and was crazy. They beat me, and they handcuffed me and hung me up. When the beating was at its worst, I silently recited,

"How much longer can the evil run rampant?

Every being's volition is fully revealed.

Who could be outside this calamity?

Looking with a smile, at the Gods being foolish." (Essentials for Further Advancement II)

When I had a sense of fear, I thought to myself, "I am a disciple of my Master, what am I afraid of? The certainty of my conviction is worth my life."

After a few days, the guards in Brigade Seven decided that they had run out of methods to deal with us, so they sent us back to Brigade Three. Once I was back, I refused to stand in line during prison call or to report to anyone. The guards did not understand. I told them that I was not a criminal, why should I submit to the prison call? So the guards had a few people drag me to the line. When they told us to squat down, I refused. Then they had a few inmates throw me to the ground. They intentionally prolonged the prison call and blamed me for not cooperating, and causing over three hundred people to endure further hardship. That created conflicts between practitioners and the regular inmates. The inmates did not understand my behavior and some practitioners did not understand it either. They said I was going to extremes. Teacher had said,

"As a human being, you are a good person only if you can follow this universe's characteristic of Zhen-Shan-Ren. A person who deviates from this characteristic is truly a bad person. In the workplace or in society, some people may say that you are bad, yet you may not necessarily be bad. Some people may say that you are good, but you may not really be good. As a practitioner, if you assimilate yourself to this characteristic you are one that has attained the Tao--it's just such a simple principle." (Zhuan Falun)

I enlightened to that teaching, and was not influenced by what the others said. I was certain that as long as something is according to the Fa, it should be followed.

A few days later, the guards changed their tactics. One guard told me, "You don't have to wear the uniform, but you need to have the words 'Provincial Women's Prison' on the back of your clothes." I told them, "Isn't that the same? I will not submit." So the guard called seven or eight inmates to force me to the ground, and then they wrote those characters on the back of my clothes. I did not know what to do.

A fellow practitioner thought we should cut the characters out. So we used scissors to cut out the characters and left a big hole on the back of my clothes. The guards called more inmates and they forced us to the ground. They wrote those characters all over our clothes. I again cut out the words. Three times in a row, I cut six pieces out of the clothing. I had no more clothes. When I worked in the workshop, I had to wear clothes with holes. Other practitioners encouraged me, "Don't be afraid of others laughing at you. When Milarepa cultivated in his time, he didn't have any clothes, so he wrapped himself in a sheet of cloth. Our condition is much better than his. What is there to be afraid of?" Some people thought I was crazy, insane, stupid, and ignorant. I did not care. On the contrary, I felt calm in my heart.

Several days later, the jail guards asked our local police officers to visit me. As soon as I saw them, I told them the truth of Falun Gong. I told them the tortures I had been subjected to in the prison. After they saw the clothes that I was wearing were full of holes, they left without saying a word.

From then on, the jail guards forced us to work all day long without rest, to prevent us from studying the Fa. We strongly demanded to be given time to study, but the guards refused our request saying that as long as we did not "transform," we would not be given time for studying. So I thought to myself, "I will find time to study even if you don't let me." So I used the short time after dinner to study. Because I did not have any books or articles, I just recited Hongying and "Lunyu." Again the guards would not allow it. I was punished by being made to stand for a long time, to walk around the workshop, and to be humiliated by inmates. But none of this had any effect on me. It only hardened my resolve. I continued to study whenever I had time.

Later, a newcomer, who was also a practitioner, recited a paragraph from Master's teachings:

"I often see students like this: 'You don't let me do the exercises, but I insist on doing them. You don't let me study, but I insist on studying. I just won't listen to you evil beings. All you can do is threaten me with death, right?' Of course, Master has said that here to you, who are cultivators. But even so, Master doesn't want to say it, because if everyday people hear it they won't be able to understand. What I'm telling you is that when you're truly able to let go of the thought of life or death you can do anything!" ("Teaching and Explaining the Fa at the Metropolitan New York Fa Conference")

Teacher also said that it is another method of silently protesting when you can stand up to validate the Fa in an environment that is filled with evil elements.

Another practitioner and I decided to validate the Fa by practicing the exercises. Once the guards saw us practicing, they immediately handcuffed us to the gate. When it was time to go to work, we were released. After work, we went back to our cells and we immediately started practicing the exercises again. As soon as we started the movements, inmates who were watching us dragged us outdoors and handcuffed us to the gate. Five days later, when the guards saw that we were still trying to practice, they put two of us in solitary confinement. The cell for solitary confinement was dark and small. It was filthy, stinky and humid. It was used for punishing inmates who had violated prison regulations, but it became a place where we practiced the exercises. We were locked up there for 15 days, and we practiced for 15 days.

Fifteen days later, the guards thought we would concede. They let us out and made us work again. When other inmates saw that we both looked even better after 15 days of solitary confinement, some said quietly, "Falun Gong is indeed good and I will practice it when I get out." Some inmates even studied the Falun Dafa articles with us. At that time, I enlightened that I should not participate in forced labor. Our purpose was to validate and defend Dafa. We should negate all the old force's arrangements. We refused to work. The guards then really hated us, and they used all sort of methods to insult and torture us. As soon as we started practicing the exercises, we would be handcuffed to the gate for 16 to 17 hours daily. Several times, the guards hung us up on the window ledge. Several inmates lifted me up to be handcuffed, and then released me, so that the weight of my whole body was on my wrists. I passed out a few times from the pain.

The guards arranged one inmate to watch the two of us. She did not allow us to talk. When we tried to tell her the truth about Falun Gong she refused to listen. One day, a guard saw that we were talking to each other. They ordered her to separate us and not allow us to speak. So we decided to go on a hunger strike. Seven days later, their behavior improved a little. But soon after, it was the same again. We were handcuffed if we studied the Fa or practiced the exercises. Whenever that happened, we went on a hunger strike. That happened six times. Three times, we were on a hunger strike for seven days, and three times for nine days. One time, during five out of the nine days, we were force-fed through tubes inserted into our stomachs. The cruelty of this torture cannot be described in words. We were handcuffed and hung from the gate on and off for more than eight months because we wanted to practice the exercises. In August this year, after three and a half years, I finally walked out of the prison with dignity.

During the three and a half years in prison, when the persecution was at its worst, we were not able to study the Fa for a long time. We did not know the progress of the Fa-rectification, and we had not heard about sending forth righteous thoughts to resist the persecution. We only silently endured it with our steadfast belief in Dafa.

During those three and a half years, I did not do well on many occasions. Mainly because I am not well educated and did not start practicing until right before the persecution began. I did not have a deep understanding of the Fa. I did not clearly understand that it was the old force's arrangement to persecute Dafa and practitioners. Facing the persecution, I only knew to tolerate it unconditionally. The evil took advantage of my loopholes and I endured suffering that I should not have. Whenever I made a mistake, I was always in agony. Teacher gave me many hints and encouraged me when that happened. Teacher truly has great mercy. The Fa-rectification is not finished yet, and I will do the three things (3) well and make up for the past three and a half years, to save more sentient beings and to be worthy of Teacher's benevolence and salvation.

Notes

(1) Carrying a sword in the back - The practitioner's hands are tied behind her back with one hand over the shoulder and the other hand against the lower back. The guards then apply a great deal of force to pull the two hands toward one another and handcuff the two hands together.

(2) Collaborators are former Falun Gong practitioners who have turned against Dafa due to brainwashing and torture.

(3) The three things that Master Li has asked practitioners to do are to study the Fa, send forth righteous thoughts and clarify the truth of Falun Dafa and the persecution to the world's people.