A Practitioner's Child Says "I Need My Mom!"
(Clearwisdom.net) My name is Ping An, and I am a middle school student [in China]. However, I was forced to quit school because my mother is a Falun Dafa practitioner.
Since July 20, 1999--when the persecution of Falun Gong started--until today, I have been living in horror, worry and fear. Because my mother practices Falun Gong, the local government officials forced my parents to divorce. Since then, my mother and I have had a difficult and worrisome life. It was even worse during the time when mother was not at home. Seeing children in other families play with their moms or go shopping together, or hearing other children calling their moms, I could not hold back my tears and just let them run down my face.
My mother had been in poor health since I was a baby, and she had to take medicine daily. At that time, I was very afraid of losing her. The illnesses that afflicted my mother for many years, however, went away after she practiced Falun Gong. Those worries that I had earlier also disappeared. But later, a new kind of fear--a worse one--came, which was when she was detained and could not return home.
One day while returning home from school, I found that my house was locked. It was a hint that something was wrong, and I felt very bad. A neighbor then told me that the police had taken my mother away. Upon hearing that, I wanted to cry, but was afraid. My heart was aching and I kept calling for mom in my heart. I almost fainted and had to sit on the ground. I did not know how long had passed before I felt hungry, but I was unable to go inside. I was also worried about if my mother was beaten.
Those thugs kept my mom in a police courtyard for more than 40 days, and later, no matter if it was day or night, those people came at anytime to break in through the window or the door. It severely interfered with our life. Sometimes, we were awakened by the horror. Sometimes, even before we went to sleep again, they came and banged on the door.
Before practicing Falun Dafa, my mother had a very bad temper, which went away because of her practice. She became kind to everyone, old and young. If my mother were not a practitioner, how could she be so calm and clarify the facts to the police when they ransacked our house? My mother's cell phone, video player, tape player, etc. were also confiscated. If my mother were not a practitioner, how could she not argue with them? But my mother was so calm.
When I heard some Falun Gong practitioners were beaten to death, I became more worried. Without any grandparents, who could help me? Sometimes I looked at the sky, and thought, "Teacher, please help my mother. My mother is truly a practitioner, and she has suffered so much. Please help her so that she can come back [home]. Mom, where are you?"
I was scared. It was already dark, and it was cold. I curled up by the door, waiting for my mother. One neighbor asked me to eat at his home. I did not--I would wait until my mother came back. I did not know how long had passed, but suddenly I heard a car coming. I was so happy and got up. However, my legs were numb. I struggled to stand up, and ran to the car, calling, "Mom, mom..." The car stopped. A lady got out, but not my mom. She told me that my mother was being held at a labor camp, and she had come to give me the key to the house. I was so disappointed.
After that, I lost the opportunity to attend school. Every day, I was waiting for my mother to come back. Hearing the wind blowing outside, I was even more afraid. The scene of the police ransacking the house appeared in my mind, and I dared not go to sleep the whole night. Every day was as if several months had passed. Finally, my mother came back. She persisted in her belief and was released after going on a hunger strike. Seeing my mother was so weak, I was very angry. I wanted to get revenge, revenge against those thugs who persecuted her. However, my mother told me not to be resentful since those people did not know the truth. She also said we should follow Teacher's teachings and try to be considerate of others under any circumstance, be kind to others, and be a good person. After hearing mother's words, although I still thought it unfair, I did stop thinking of revenge.
However, the peace did not last long. National Day came. It did not bring me a holiday's happiness, but instead led us into a horrifying night. In the evening, I watched TV for a while and went to bed. However, not long after that, I heard mother calling out, "Ping An, Wake up!" I immediately sat up. At that moment, there were footsteps above the house. Then, there were sounds of jumping over the fence, breaking in the door, together with sounds of bumping and hitting. I was so scared and did not know what to do. First some police jumped over the fence, and then some pounded on the door. They broke in the door. They then called my mother's name. In order to protect my mother from being beaten, I went to stand in front of her. They hit me with a fist. Two police thugs threw me into the yard. I stood up, ran into the house, and stood by my mother again.
At that time, they had already ransacked the room. Clothes were everywhere, and the closets were damaged. Even a box on the wall was dislodged and searched. The bed was also messed up. The thugs did not know how shameful what they did was, and even took pictures of the scene. I saw vegetable oil running on the floor and felt very bad--my mother and I did not have much vegetable oil to cook with for the whole year! I cried. Upon hearing that they would take my mother away, I became alert and said to them, "I will not allow you take mom away." "We are police," they replied. Some of them dragged me, and some dragged my mother. Mom told me, "Your mom is a good person. You should believe that your mom will not die. Otherwise, it must be them who kill me (1)." The police van took away my mother. They said Falun Gong practitioners do not care about family and children. The reality is quite the opposite: it is they--not my mom--who deprived my mother of her right to care for her child. Who is truly committing the crime here?
Two months later, my mother came back. Her legs were injured at the "610 Office." She had then gone on a hunger strike and was released. After mother returned home and did the Falun Gong exercises, her health quickly recovered. However, the thugs still did not stop doing bad deeds. Half a year later, they ransacked our house twice. I was so scared that I almost lost consciousness. Whenever I hear rain, wind blowing, footsteps, even a cat jumping from the fence, it totally startles me. This persecution has brought enormous losses to my family physically, mentally, and financially. Just like countless children who have lost one or both parents, we hope to have a peaceful family life, and we need their care.
I need my mom! I do not want my mom to leave me!
Kind people please help me and the other children get their mothers back!
October 13, 2004
(1) Many Falun Gong practitioners have been tortured to death by police, their bodies cremated, and then their family members told that it was suicide.