Respect the Boundaries between Men and Women
(Clearwisdom.net) About two weeks ago, I got a new job which was easy and I would have plenty of time to do the three things. The salary was not bad either and I really treasured this job. But I developed less righteous thoughts. Because I was afraid of losing this job, I thought that I should develop a good relationship with my colleagues which would be beneficial to doing my work well. This way, my cost of living would be guaranteed and my Fa study would be assured. Now, when I recall my thoughts on this, I feel that they were not worthy of a practitioner. Led by the thought of developing good relationships with my colleagues, I greeted them enthusiastically and joked and chatted with them. As a result, my female colleagues considered that I was too boisterous and they worried about my ability to do my job. Also, one male colleague developed thoughts of lust and kept chatting with me.
I felt upset, but I knew it was all the result of my own heart. I searched within and saw my strong attachments to profit, self, and lust. Later, the environment became better, but that male colleague still came around every day and joked with me. I thought that chatting and joking with him a little wouldn't matter, but afterwards I felt heavy in my heart and memories of my previous dating came back. At night during my dreams I used to fly and feel free, but as soon as my attachment of lust came out, my body became heavy and I was not able to fly. I knew it was Master reminding me that I must let go of the attachment to lust. I was surprised that even though I did not take a liking to this male colleague and only joked with him, it was enough to bring out my attachment to lust. Later, I gradually realized that my behavior was improper even though I was only socializing with him.
So what is a proper way for a man and a woman to socialize with each other? I suddenly remembered what Master said,
"You all know that Westerners don't understand why Chinese people are still so reserved when it comes to relationships between men and women. Let me tell you that this is how humans should be." (Teaching the Fa at the Conference in Europe)
It was because I was careless and my actions were thoughtless that I did not respect the boundaries between my male colleagues and myself when talking and joking with them. I was flattering myself and thinking that I did not have an attachment to lust. I did not pay attention to the fact that we should distinguish between males and females. My loophole was taken advantage of by the old forces and my attachment to lust was strengthened and amplified. Various thoughts ran through my mind. I felt puzzled that this happened: it was just like a drug affecting my brain and messing up my thoughts. Once I understood the principle of the Fa at this level, my mind became much more calm. Today when I was reading Minghui (the Chinese version of Clearwisdom.net), I read an article called "Distinguish Between Man and Woman." Dafa practitioners should follow the standard of distinguishing between men and women. It is the true standard of humanity. Following this standard is also to truly conform to society in one's cultivation and leaves no loopholes for the old forces to take advantage of.
I wrote down the lesson I learned and hope that fellow practitioners who are still tempted by desire and lust can learn from my lesson. Of course, Dafa practitioners treat all beings equally in clarifying the truth. Males, females, seniors and children are all beings that we ought to save. But in socializing with people, we should behave properly.
This is my personal understanding. Please kindly point out where I need to improve.