Stepping Out of Depression
(Clearwisdom.net) The much-anticipated DVD of the Divine Performing Arts arrived. Fellow practitioners had been talking about it and trying to get a hold of it. With the assistance of a fellow practitioner, I succeeded in burning a copy for myself. At that moment, I felt that I had come alive again, like a real Dafa practitioner.
Over the years, immersed in the Chinese Communist culture and fearing the persecution, I developed a shell that protected my true self. Trapped in that shell, I was hesitant to do things and had a lot of fear. Since 1999 when the persecution started, many practitioners around me and I have experienced the ordeals inflicted on us by the evil Party controlled by the old forces, as well as the public's misunderstanding and self-interest. I had been feeling very depressed, unmotivated, and in pain. I had not been able to study the Fa and do the exercises with a calm mind. Nor could I do the three things well. I felt that there was a heavy substance hanging over my head that suppressed my righteous thoughts. I had been waiting for this substance to be eliminated so I could be pure and clear-minded with strong righteous thoughts and be able to do some truth clarification work such as burning CDs and distributing informational materials.
However, the evils took advantage of this and interfered with me again and again. More and more of the rotten substance piled up over my head. For a period of time, I didn't want to sleep. As soon as I slept, I would have dreams and could not wake up. As a result, I missed Fa-study and doing the exercises. In those dreams, my primordial soul was very involved in mundane things. When I woke up, I found that more rotten substances had been added to my body, some of which I needed to send forth righteous thoughts for a long time before I could get rid of them. This kept me in an ordeal all the time.
Every time I thought about how urgent it is to save sentient beings, I wished that I could just get rid of all these ordeals and be with fellow practitioners and spread the truth so that sentient beings could be saved. Then I enlightened that, no matter what happens, as long as I follow Teacher's requirement, I am negating the old forces. The best way to negate the old forces is not to think about whatever symptoms I have. Otherwise, I would never get out of the trap.
Any ways of thinking, notions and habits that are not conducive to validating the Fa are rotten substances and beings that will resist your eliminating them. They will interfere with you and drag you down so that they can continue to exist in your environment. The way to eliminate the interference is to step out of the traditional way of thinking and to realize that these thoughts are not yours. Teacher said, "In Fa-Rectification Your Thoughts Have to be Righteous, Not Human." At the same time, you have to strengthen your righteous thoughts and not to take the human thoughts seriously. Only then can you overpower them and be able to study the Fa with a calm mind, do the exercises, and do the three things well. The rotten substance and the old forces will be negated during the process. Whenever something happens, we should think about what a righteous god would do in such situations. What should you do to follow the requirements of Dafa and Teacher? If you don't follow Teacher, the old forces will have many excuses to persecute you endlessly.
I should jump out of the tribulations and fill my mind with Dafa and Teacher. I really have no time for anything else and find it a total waste of my time to mention my own tribulations. When I could calm down and burn my first CD of the 2009 DPA performance, it felt so good to be able to do something for the sentient beings, just like a real Dafa practitioner. I was alive again.
After I watched the Divine Performing Arts 2009 show, I felt that I was returning home, getting closer to Teacher and fellow practitioners and that the evil could not reach me anymore. Heaven and earth is one. The backdrops of the show were spectacular, the MCs were confidant and courteous, connecting the audience in China with the audience outside of China. All the dancers are so pure and natural and confidant in what they are doing. Mr. Guan Guimin sings with energy unique to a cultivator and is very impressive. And whenever he came on the stage, he would bow to his accompanist first. He was very civil to everyone. The performances were so refreshing and touching. We can see the divinely-inspired culture, inspiring people to think about the purpose of life.
Thank you, Teacher. Thank you to all who participated in the production.