A New Practitioner: Finding the Truth After Waiting Millions of Years
(Clearwisdom.net) My parents began practicing Falun Dafa in February 2008 and I learned Dafa from them in March. I want to share my experience with fellow practitioners.
One day in March, my mother gave me a DVD of the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party. Ever since I was a child I resented watching the news, so I was relatively free from the Party's vicious, mind-poisoning lies. I did not have any misunderstanding about Dafa; it was easy for me to accept the facts.Master's Prompt
One night I dreamed a group of classmates and I were standing inside a school building. Suddenly, I heard a loud noise. One classmate ran up to me, "A demon is snatching people outside, hurry up and run!" Everyone including myself panicked and scattered. Most classmates were captured, then eaten or killed. I was the only one who made it outside the school gate, only to bump into another demon waiting there! He liked my human skin, so he tried to skin me alive and make a pair of gloves for himself. I ran hysterically and chanted verses from numerous Buddhist disciplines, but the demon was not afraid at all. Although he could not catch me, he followed me relentlessly. I ran to my parents' home, and saw my mother and I hid behind her. The demon then changed into my classmate, and my mother was going to greet him. I grabbed her and nervously pulled her back. When I hit the wall I suddenly recalled that my mother practices cultivation, so I hastily asked, "Mom, what is the name of your Master?" She looked at me and said, "Mr. Li Hongzhi." As soon as she uttered these words, the demon changed into its original form and I immediately said, "He [Mr. Li Hongzhi] is my Master, too!" I shouted with all of my strength, "Master Li, please help me!" As soon as I said the word, "Li," stiffness replaced the mocking look on the demon's face. Having said Master's name, the demon's red face turned into pale green from fright. Before I could finish my sentence, the demon tried to run away but he was somehow overcome and could not move his feet. The danger was over. I threw myself in my mother's arms and cried my heart out. Then I woke up from the dream, crying.
Now that I think about it, everyone in this world came to obtain Falun Dafa. This dream was a hint to me that there is no god saving people in any religion, and demons have completely destroyed society. Just as Master said,
"I know the state of qigong all across the country, and I can say that right now, whether we're talking about inside China or abroad, I'm the only one who's really transmitting a practice that takes you to higher levels."
"Transmitting a practice that takes you to high levels--now think about it, what's that mean? Isn't it about saving people?"
"In the Age of the Law's End it's hard for monks in monasteries to save even themselves, let alone save others." (The First Talk of Zhuan Falun)
Master could not help me because I did not practice Falun Dafa, because Master came here to save people. I called out to Master in my dream when my main consciousness was not quite strong. Nevertheless, I was able to acknowledge myself as Master's disciple, which was the same as saying, "I want to practice Falun Dafa." Master began guiding me on the path of cultivation.
After this dream I would burst into tears whenever I saw a picture of Master. I was excited and a little sad, and I felt Master was my closest family member from whom I had been separated for a long time, finally reunited again in this life.Xinxing Tests
When I first began practicing Dafa, my husband did not support me. Since we had gotten married only recently, I tried to avoid conflicts by doing the Falun Gong exercises when he was not home or doing them at my parents' home. One day, after my husband left for work, I thought about buying a recorder and bringing the tapes home the next day. I would talk to him and slowly he would change, and I would be able to do the exercises at home. When this thought emerged, a voice tried to stop me by persuading me not to do the exercises at home. I thought, "If you interfere with me again, I will clear you away with righteous thoughts." The voice immediately disappeared. I thought to myself, "I can't wait until tomorrow, I must do it today. The more the evil tries to stop me, the more determined I will be." In the evening, my parents brought a large recorder and the three of us did the exercises together. Master encouraged and strengthened my divine powers on that day, and the energy field was excellent. My mother said she saw lots of colorful, spinning Law Wheels.
The evil was trying to stop me from doing the exercises, but I ended up doing them with my parents. I not only disintegrated the evil but also passed my first xinxing test.
I remember Master said,
"To those Dafa disciples who have just obtained the Fa, I say that you are so fortunate." "However, it won't be that just because you have entered [Dafa] only recently the standard of cultivation will be lowered for you. So in cultivation you must try hard to do the three things that Dafa disciples should do well, and at the same time save sentient beings and fulfill the roles that Dafa disciples should." ("Fa Teaching at the 2007 New York Fa Conference")
Several days later, I was alone at home reading Essentials for Further Advancement when I heard a menacing and sarcastic voice saying, "Oh, so you dare to read Dafa books and practice Dafa? Right now, people are being arrested out there! If you continue to practice, you'll get arrested and tortured to death!" I was very calm and immediately recalled passages from Master's Fa, so I answered, "My Master said, 'Having heard the Dao in the morning, one can die in the evening.' Although I obtained the Fa relatively late, even if I were to die now, I would have no regrets." The voice immediately disappeared. I also felt that my dimension was pure and comfortable. I realized maybe this was what Master said,
"My teaching Dafa widely is to offer salvation to all. Whoever learns it
is my disciple. Not following old rituals and conventions, I ignore superficial
formalities and only look at one's heart."
"Teacher will certainly have Law Bodies (fashen) safeguarding them quietly. With perseverance, they will certainly achieve Righteous Attainment in the future." ("Seeking Discipleship with Teacher", Essentials for Further Advancement)
The next test was whether I would have the courage to go out and validate the Fa. After I began practicing Dafa I often told my husband that Dafa is good and is the righteous Fa; it is not like what is said on TV, and the Party had staged the self-immolation with non-Falun Gong practitioners in Tiananmen Square to damage Falun Gong. At first, however, I was not very articulate and did not know enough about things that happened early in the persecution, while my husband argued with human notions. He was very aggressive, so I ended up listening to him talk for a long time but I could not slip in a single word. I could not give up, however, because everyone had come for the Fa. I understood that my husband and I must have a deep predestined relationship that connects us in this life, and since I have obtained Dafa, I must let him know that Dafa is good.
One day, I again told him Falun Dafa is good but he switched topics and said, "You don't do anything for long. When your parents stop practicing you'll quit, too." I said, "That is impossible. My parents will never give up Dafa, and I will practice even if they quit." He was offended and challenged me by saying, "Since you practice Falun Gong, would you talk to people about Falun Gong in public? They are arresting Falun Gong practitioners out there! It feels like it's ok right now, but in fact the government doesn't allow it [Falun Gong practice] at all." He implied, "I know you too well." At the time, the police were ransacking home-based Dafa truth clarification materials production sites. I said without hesitation, "Of course I can. I will go out and say, 'Falun Dafa is good' and explain things to people. I will also tell them that I can do this because my family has agreed to it." He was taken by surprise and grew silent. I normally lose all arguments with him, but this time my determination was strong and won out. He gradually acquiesced to my belief and he even watched Master's Guangzhou lecture series with me. Sometimes he would ask me, "Have you done the meditation yet?" "Have you done the other four exercises yet?" Sometimes he reminded me when it was time to send righteous thoughts.
I understood that if I could truly give up the thoughts of life and death and truly wanted to obtain the Fa and practice cultivation, then no one would be able to stop me. I had the opportunity and great fortune to become a Dafa disciple because I was able to let go of the attachment to life and death.
As long as we have powerful righteous thoughts, we can overcome any xinxing test. If we don't have enough righteous thoughts, we would regard the test as a huge barrier. If you think it's big, it will get bigger; if you think it's small, it will get smaller. The most important thing is to regard tribulations with righteous thoughts and not be daunted by them."Look Inward" at All Times During Cultivation
Master repeatedly mentions the phrase "look inward" in Zhuan Falun, which means these words carry incredible significance. I realize we have to always "look inward" as long as we practice cultivation and raise our xinxing level.
I often pay attention to the attachments that surface in my thoughts, but it's not easy to do it. One night in a dream I saw myself poking and popping lots of balloons with my fingers until there were none left. After I woke up, I realized Master was reminding me to discard all pursuits and attachments until none remained. [The Chinese character "pursuit" rhymes with the word "balloon"] Since then, I paid close attention to every thought, whether I was studying the Fa, doing the exercises or talking to people.
(1) Attachments are the root problem that prevent me from attaining a pure mind
During Fa study and doing the exercises I kept thinking about other things; especially during the second exercise and meditation, all kinds of thoughts turned up in my head, including things that happened a long time ago, and I could not calm my mind. When I read the Fa, it was not as bad, but random thoughts would only occasionally emerge. I realized that thought karma kept stirring around, and most of the other thoughts were external interference. I had to first cleanse my heart before I could calm my heart, and in order to do that, I had to look inward to identify attachments.
I kept looking inward until I discovered the root of the attachments and annihilated it. During this process I was clear that I must clearly realize that those thoughts are not me, but instead human notions that must be whittled away. We are acting with righteous thoughts if we see things with our divine mindset.
I saw myself as the real self and the one with chaotic thoughts as the false self. Although the real me could not prevent the false me from generating bad thoughts, the real me could nevertheless find attachments to fame, fortune or sentiments, and further eliminate them since they go against Truth-Compassion-Forbearance. Just as Master said,
"When you look in at the elixir field, that sparkling elixir looks pretty nice, but a moment later that elixir turns into something else, like a dream home. "That room is for my son when he gets married. That room is for my daughter. My wife and I will have this room. In the middle is the living room. It's great! Am I going to get this house? I have to figure out how to get it. Now, what should I do..." People are just attached to those things. So do you think your mind could become still?" (the Ninth Talk of Zhuan Falun)
When random thoughts kept interfering with me, I would first ponder whether they are caused by pursuit of material possessions and comfort, which lead to complacency, suspicion, competitiveness and greed, all of which do not conform to the Fa. My attachment to emotion was also exposed: my obsession about my children is an attachment to emotion, and so is my love for my husband, all of which are based on selfishness. When this happens, I would clear away the attachments of the fake me and filthy, acquired notions and interference from karma, then look at things with righteous thoughts. Then the thought karma would be gone because the root of the attachments had been wiped out.
(2) Eliminating attachments starting from small things
I look inward with every thought and action and try to put as much Fa in my head as I can.
Master has arranged for us to cultivate among ordinary people. We all have jobs and families; therefore it's impossible for us not to read, listen or look at ordinary things. However, by looking inward, we can disintegrate acquired notions that have formed at a young age. Also, we come across many deviant things on a daily basis, and we have to beware of being polluted by them.
One day while getting ready to cook I thought, "What should I make? What would my husband like to eat?" Then I would realize I had attachment to flavors and attachment to my husband. I then proceeded to send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate them before resuming cooking.
I also recited Master's Fa. I realized that I was disintegrating the bad things while reciting the Fa. I usually recite poems from Hong Yin. I recite them when cooking, doing laundry, mopping the floor, before sleep and after I get up in the morning, and while walking or shopping. I recite the Fa whenever I can. The best thing I found to suppress bad thoughts so they cannot get a chance to cause trouble, is to fill my head with the Fa and strengthen my main consciousness so that I have powerful righteous thoughts. When I encounter a difficult situation, I judge it with Dafa's standards so I am in sync with the Fa at all times. That is how I try my best to reduce interference and persecution while doing well what we are supposed to do.
In order to achieve what Master has described, "Listening, but caring not to hear--A mind so hard to disturb" ("Abiding in the Dao", Hong Yin), I continue to "look inward." When my colleagues, relatives and fellow practitioners chat with me and complain about things or discuss issues, I listen attentively and try to identify which attachment is causing their problems. If their thoughts do not conform to the Fa, I then see if I have similar attachments. This way, I will not have allowed bad things to enter my head and I will have improved myself in the meantime, as I disintegrate acquired notions and karma.
Master said, "In true cultivation you have to cultivate your mind, you have to cultivate inward, to look inward--you can't look outward." (the Ninth Talk of Zhuan Falun)
Interference from the Old Forces
For a while, I was busy with some trivial things and reduced the amount of time I devoted to memorizing the Fa, and sometimes I would even forget to recite the Fa. My main consciousness was not strong, and as a result the old forces often interfered with me.
The old forces see lust as the worst attachment, and they will exploit it if one does not discard it during cultivation.
One day, a man whom I dated before marriage called me and asked me out. I thought maybe he needed my help with something, so I asked if he had an emergency. He said no, he simply wanted to see me. I felt that something was not right and I firmly turned him down.
Dafa has an even stricter requirement for practitioners. The first test we must pass in cultivation is lust, and there is more than one test in this regard, which shows how important it is in cultivation.
"Those who are attached to lust are no different from wicked people. While reciting the scriptures, they even cast furtive glances; they are far from the Dao and are wicked, everyday people." ("Cultivators' Avoidances" in Essentials for Further Advancement)
Lust is a major prohibition for cultivators; therefore we must resolutely eliminate it and all interference resulting from it.
(2) Demons in my dreams
For a while afterwards, I had random dreams almost daily. Sometimes there were things that a cultivator cannot do occurring in my dream, and I would struggle to wake up and sit straight. I would conjoin my hands, look inward for attachments and then send forth righteous thoughts. I am a Dafa disciple and I will walk the path Master has arranged for me and I want nothing else.
Still, the dreams came back night after night. I remembered Dafa, so I would utter the verse, "The Fa rectifies the cosmos, the evil is completely eliminated" when I first start dreaming. I was able to do this and I overcame the demons.
Because I had strong righteous thoughts, I was able to negate the old force's arrangements and when I overcame the interference, I raised my xinxing; therefore Master could separate the part of me that had been purified. So the evil no longer had any excuse to interfere with me.
Now, I have resumed reciting the Fa, because only by being within the Fa at all times will I maintain powerful righteous thoughts. I judge all things with the Fa in my mind.
Looking Inward Helps Me Clarify the Facts
Looking inward is a treasure that Master has bestowed upon his disciples, and it's the fastest way for a human to transform into a divine being. We can use it at any and all times. After I formed the habit of looking inward, it became the best way for me to explain the facts to people. Although I still lack experience, when I talk to people, I can find their attachments, and I further say things that they can respond to positively, that conform to their attachments.
(1) Target people's attachments
Most people nowadays are very selfish, and they consider their self-interest whenever they do something. Therefore, when I explain the facts to them, I explain the benefits of quitting the Party in terms of how it fulfills their own interests. Then, they are more attentive. Most of the time, I tell them they can quit the Party by nodding and agreeing to it, because if I say too much, they become suspicious.
Most young people are poisoned by atheism, but they are very curious. I mostly tell them about the miraculous things I read on the Minghui/Clearwisdom website to serve as an icebreaker, or I talk about human rights violations and cruelty in China.
Women are usually vain and they like to show off. When I talk to a woman, I first praise her looks, her hairstyle, clothes and jewelry, when we start a light-hearted chat. I gradually switch the topic to quitting the Party. People who have children dote on their children, and I also talk about things related to children.
Old people cherish their money. Usually they agree to quit the Party when I explain the threat to their lives if they do not. For people who are familiar with the Party's crimes, I explain to them the Party's vicious nature and moral corruption in society, and they tend to agree. When I tell them "Truth-Compassion-Forbearance is good," they mostly nod and say they will certainly remember it.
(2) Explaining the facts to people
Sometimes I talk about things that people can accept but I avoid saying too much so as not to turn them away.
I often hire tricycles when I go out, and I talk to the drivers. Once, I talked to a driver who was an old man, and we talked about the Party's corruption and I asked if he had ever joined any Party organizations. He said no and I asked him to remember "Falun Dafa is good, Truth-Compassion-Forbearance is good," so he would stay safe when any disasters come. He gladly agreed.
As we rescue one more person, we have won a battle against the old forces by saving another life. The stage is set for Falun Dafa, and only Dafa disciples are the main actors. Only by doing well the three things with righteous thoughts and righteous actions can we fulfill our duty bestowed by Dafa.
During the few months since we obtained the Fa, my parents have explained the facts to many people, and lots of friends and relatives have learned the truth and some even joined us in practicing Dafa. Only after I studied the Fa did I find the explanations for everything I felt existed but had no way to prove. Only Dafa gave me the answer to the question, "Why are we here? Why do I exist?"
My obtaining the Fa is also a testament to the greatness of fellow practitioners. More and more people have learned the truth, which enables more people to learn about Dafa. I hope all of us can walk steadily on the path of validating the Fa.