Cultivation While Producing Truth Clarifying Material
(Clearwisdom.net) After our local material production center was destroyed, and practitioners working there arrested, we had to depend on out of town centers to supply us with truth clarification material. It was a slow, inconvenient, expensive and unsafe practice. Every time I went to other cities, practitioners there would suggest that we reestablish our center. Our local coordinators had a hard time identifying a suitable person to lead this. In the end, I felt obligated to take on this task.
Validate Master's Compassion and the Mighty Power of Dafa
I had always wanted to work on truth clarification material production, but always stopped short of taking action. I thought that I had no money for that. Our home mortgage still had a big balance, and we were receiving help from my husband's parents to pay it off. My husband had lost his job, and was too frugal to spend his hard-earned savings. My salary was also very low. Some fellow practitioners offered to buy a computer for me. But I worried about others' opinions: "Where did you get the money to buy the computer? If you had money for a computer, why didn't you pay off your mortgage first? Would my husband agree? I became a slave to my human attachments.
But the situation suddenly changed. One day my husband told me: "Please get a broadband connection, I am buying a computer today." I was surprised that my frugal husband would take the initiative to buy a computer. Soon, we had a computer and internet. His parents did not raise any objections. My computer issue was solved naturally. I did not have much to say about it, but in my heart, I felt a strong shock. Everything was arranged by Master. I had absolutely no doubt about this. Master saw that I wanted to buy a computer, and he helped me to realize the dream. The power of Dafa is almighty. If we have a righteous mind, Master will help us.
I quickly learned how to connect to the Minghui website using internet freedom software. One day a fellow practitioner, on her way to visit relatives, came to my home. She informed me about some internet safety precautions, and also showed me how to download and print Minghui Weekly and other pamphlets. At that time I had no printer, so I began to contemplate what model to buy and how to finance the purchase. Soon I found a good model from the internet, and decided to use my personal savings to buy one. I did not tell my husband about it because he was busy. I was not overly concerned about his opinion. I asked a trusted relative to buy the printer for me, but he refused due to concerns about my safety. Looking at it in retrospect, why couldn't I buy the printer myself? I had too much fear, and worried that some acquaintance might see me. Just as I was sweating over the printer purchase, the fellow practitioner who taught me how to print came again. She brought a box which contained, you guessed it: The exact model printer I was planning to buy! Prior to this, we had only met once, and did not even have each other's phone numbers. She did not know if I had bought a printer or not. But she happened to visit a nearby store, so she just bought the printer for me. She even refused to accept my money, telling me to use it on paper and ink. I was so amazed at Master's boundless compassion and almighty power.
Relinquishing Attachments During Material Production
With a printer, we were able to produce truth clarification material locally. We no longer relied on other areas for our supply. During the past few years, I felt that this material preparation experience was also a process of abandoning attachments. It was for my own cultivation path.
1) Letting Go of the Mentality of Dependency
Since childhood, I was a very dependent person, and had trouble making up my mind. After I became a practitioner, I learned that a cultivator must have his own righteous mind. But my dependent notions were deeply rooted. After the fellow practitioner bought me the printer, she immediately tried to install it, but after a much effort, she still could not make the connection. At the time, she had another commitment and had to leave. My computer knowledge was next to nothing. Therefore, I really wished that she could have installed the printer, and taught me some basic steps. Due to my dependency on her, she just could not install it. By the time she had to leave, she told me that it is not supposed to be that hard. All one has to do is to click "next" with a mouse.
At that point I had no one to rely on, but I was calmer than before. I sat down and sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate any interference. I had a strong thought: No one is qualified to interfere with my most righteous effort. I knew only Master could help, so I asked for his empowerment. After that, I sat with the computer and began installing the printer. Everything went smoothly. I then sent a test page to the printer. I was amazed that something that seemed so difficult was actually very easy.
Now I was on my own, I had to recall fellow practitioners' advice when producing truth clarifying material. I had to think for myself. Since I had no one to rely on, my habit of dependency was diminishing. I was able to produce different kinds of materials through trial and error, and after reading experience sharing articles by practitioners. I also learned how to submit a "Quitting the Party" statement, the "Solemn Statement" and cultivation articles to Minghui.
I gained a deeper understanding from this experience. Although it appears that I learned these skills through independent thinking and making an effort, in reality, it was Master who gave me the capability. Master's mighty virtue had arranged everything.
My motivation to produce truth clarifying materials related to the urgent need by practitioners in our area. I was determined to accomplish this because it was Dafa's need. But I knew that I still had fear and my heart was not completely calm. The practitioners who produced truth-clarifying materials before me were all arrested. I had some hidden fear, but I was determined not to let danger stop me. Initially, I did not have a righteous understanding based on the Fa principles, and did not totally deny the old forces' persecution.
After I started to produce the material, something happened. One day after 9:00 p.m., I heard the sound of a police car. Usually, I did not pay much attention to police cars. But that day, I experienced a moment of fear: "Is someone coming to get me?" Right after this thought, I heard the sound of people coming upstairs. They rang our door bell. I was so nervous that my body went limp. I did not answer the door, nor did I see who they were. I turned off my computer and lights. Then I began to send forth righteous thoughts. After a long time, my fear gradually vanished. After I shared this experience with fellow practitioners, we all realized that my fear had caused an imaginary incident. There was no police visit that night. With increased effort in studying the Fa, my understanding improved.
"If you are not afraid, the factor that would make you afraid will cease to exist." ("Eliminate Your Last Attachment(s)," Essential for Further Advancement II)
We must relinquish our fears. We can only be completely safe if we have no fears. I am Master's disciple. Master told us not to acknowledge the persecution, why should I be afraid? I am Master's disciple and no one can touch our Master. As long as I take righteous action and follow Master's teachings, then no one can touch me. What am I afraid of?
I continued to produce truth clarifying material and fulfill my vow to help-out. I no longer have any fear and feel very delighted. My heart is calm and unwavering. Nothing has ever happened to me, and no police ever came over to my house.
After the publication of Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party, millions of Chinese have quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). Every week, I received many names of people who decided to announce their decision to renounce the CCP online. I also received cultivation articles and solemn statements from fellow practitioners. In addition, I had to download and print many documents. I felt a lot of pressure working on these assignments. Sometimes, I had trouble deciphering the handwriting, no matter how hard I tried. When I first encountered this problem, I forgot that I was a practitioner. Due to a lack of compassion, I became impatient and even resentful of these practitioners.
One day my resentment resurfaced, and suddenly I realized that my heart was not calm. I recalled from Master's teaching that we should always look at our own thoughts whenever some difficulty occurs. I stopped what I was doing and began to recollect my thoughts. I then began to draft an experience sharing paper called "relinquish the resentment." I thought about the pressure that Master has to endure, and the many gifts he has given us. I owe everything to Master and Dafa. I have no right to complain about fellow practitioners. They are all cultivators in this human world. All the people who quit the CCP were a direct result of a fellow practitioners' hard work. I have no right to expect these people to be perfect. A Dafa practitioner should not possess strong resentments. We are supposed to have compassion for all, including our fellow practitioners. My resentment was a physical substance, and it can cause division among practitioners. It only serves to strengthen the negative energy field. If I keep resenting, Master will be disappointed.
After I finished the paper, my heart calmed down. I no longer feel any resentment.
4) Eliminate Attachments to Doing Work, Zealotry and Self Validation; Produce Truth Clarifying Material with a Pure Heart
During the production of truth clarifying material, some of my human mentalities would come out. Sometimes when I was focusing on finishing an assignment, I even skipped sending righteous thoughts. Sometimes I felt complacent when I looked at all the work I had accomplished. I also had some thoughts that served to validate my own capability. This personal experience showed that when I have human attachments, and my heart is not pure, I would encounter problems right away. Sometimes the computer had a trouble; the printer quit working; paper got jammed; printing quality was unacceptable; or I used the wrong format; etc. I knew then that Dafa work is different from everyday work in society. I have to do it with a pure heart. So before I work on producing truth clarifying material, I send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate any interference and my own attachments. I ask Master to empower me. After that, things would go smoothly.
Now, I am making materials with a pure heart. I am only doing something that I am supposed to do. I know deep inside my heart that without Master's protection and guidance, I could do nothing. From now on, I will redouble my effort. I will fulfill my pre-historical pledge.