New Practitioner: My Faith in Dafa Is Steadfast
(Clearwisdom.net) After arriving in the U.S., I finally realized what freedom is. I rejoice that I was able to separate myself from the evil Chinese Communist Party. Living in the U.S. has allowed me to meet a lot of fellow practitioners. Everybody is of one heart and one mind in cultivating Dafa together.
Sometimes while studying the Fa, my xinxing was not upgraded very much, which made me feel very ashamed and I often criticized myself. However, I am happy and grateful for the fellow practitioners I met, who gave me a lot of comfort and encouragement after they got to know my temperament and cultivation state. They pointed out that self-blame is also cultivation to a degree. It is a kind of self-examination made as a first step in a beginner's long-term cultivation process. They said that they had similar problems at the beginning, but told me that as long as I followed Dafa, I would be able to improve. This reassured me, and I was more diligent about studying the Fa after this.
My wife and I came to the U.S. together. Both of us are young and we both were a little spoiled as children at home, so we often quarreled over differences of opinion in our daily life. I studied Dafa before we got married. Although I was somewhat prepared for married life, I thought things would be OK as long as both of us were tolerant and considerate of each other, and that it should not be too difficult to get along with each other. But I found that I still had only a child's tolerance after marrying. Sometimes I felt indifferent towards my wife. Now looking back, I feel ashamed of myself that I didn't treat my wife, who is my only family member here in the U.S., with compassion.
Cultivating in Dafa has shown me that it is up to me to change the outcome of things. Therefore, every time my wife and I disagreed, I would try my best to calm down and let Teacher's words reverberate in my mind. Teacher taught me that such occasions were the opportune time to demonstrate my generous and gentle temperament and it should be my first step in raising my xinxing. Whenever I felt it was unfair because I did more household chores than my wife, I would remember that I am a cultivator. Loss and gain are unimportant to a cultivator. After experiencing a hint like this in my heart, I found that I could accomplish a task with ease and I also became happy. My wife, a Christian, had initially rejected Dafa, but after seeing the changes in me, she came to a better understanding of Dafa. She unexpectedly began to cultivate with me at home.
Because I paid attention to self-enhancement from childhood, I often read books about making choices that would bring me success in life. But I also felt deeply in my heart that I could have a kind of conversation with the divine to comfort me. I always thought there was a God in this world. He was mysterious and unfathomable and did not deal with matters according to our everyday people's principles. This gave me a subconscious base for understanding Dafa. In fact, in our Chinese civilization, people always worshiped heaven and earth. However, Teacher also said that in the Age of the Law's End, people's wills are chaotic, right and wrong are turned upside down, ancient moral principles are being rejected, and many filthy things are flooding society.
I began to study Dafa on my own by downloading Dafa materials from the Internet. It is very difficult to break through the Internet blockade in China. Nevertheless, because I had understood Dafa to a certain degree, no matter how difficult it was, I still relied on my computer knowledge to find Dafa and from that time on, I stepped onto the path of cultivation.
I used to be irritable with my old friends and colleagues. I felt that since we knew each other very well and that as long as I did not have any bad intentions towards them and kept a pleasant, non-blaming attitude in our casual conversations, they would understand that my irritability stemmed from good intentions. Now, after following Teacher's principles, everyone says that they get along better with me than before, and they like to be around me.
Regarding material interests, I used to think that everyone should have a fair share. So if I felt I was taken advantage of and suffered a loss, I would voice my concern and strive to get my fair share. Of course, when it comes to spiritual interest, such as freedom of speech, in this case I think everyone should be entitled to the same thing. However, as for money, I've changed my notion. Now I think as long as I have enough money to make ends meet, there's no need to go for more. It's not worth fighting for money.
In China, I progressed very slowly in cultivating Dafa. In half a year I had learned only the first three sets of exercises. Even with that, I still felt that my body changed, I was in good spirits, got sick less and my complexion became ruddy and didn't look sallow like before. In addition, I would often feel dizzy and tired from working, and just sitting in a moving vehicle would cause me to vomit. You can imagine how weak my body was at that time. Now I no longer feel dizzy and I can ride in a vehicle and read a newspaper or book for a long time.
What makes me the happiest is that I feel a steadfast faith in Dafa. I always felt things were difficult before but now all my difficulties are not really difficulties, but opportunities that temper me. With Dafa, I am able to overcome every difficulty.