A Small Flower Amid a Field of Blooms
(Clearwisdom.net) Greetings Master, and Greetings fellow practitioners!
I am an old intellectual and have practiced Falun Gong since 1995. Though there have been four web-based experience sharing conferences mainly for practitioners from China, I had not previously shared my cultivation experiences, probably due to a misunderstanding on my cultivation path. After the Minghui/Clearwisdom website editors called for articles for the Fifth Internet Experience Sharing Conference for Practitioners in China, I had a dream of taking an exam, as if Master was reminding me to turn in my exam, and I felt I shouldn't wait any longer. I wrote this experience-sharing article to summarize my experiences during my years of cultivation.
1. Falun Gong Practice
My health was poor, as I had hepatitis in middle age, and had developed hepato-cirrhosis. I also later had pulmonary emphysema and other diseases. Chinese traditional medicine, western medicine and qigong did not heal me, and I felt that I would soon die. That was in 1995 when someone introduced me to Falun Gong. I wanted to try it, and see whether Falun Gong could improve my health.
Practicing the five exercises improved my health, and reading the book Zhuan Falun helped me comprehend that Falun Gong differs from common qigongs. The book's messages about Buddhas, Taos, and Gods were contradictory to atheism, which I had been taught by the Chinese Communist Party my whole life. I was shocked, and I decided to only focus on curing my illnesses, leaving the questionable issues aside, and in the meantime continue to study and cultivate Falun Gong.
I skipped parts in the book regarding Buddhas, Taos and Gods, and I was still strongly attached to healing. My health was better but it didn't change much compared to other practitioners. Nevertheless, I felt that Falun Gong could teach one to become a better person and could heal illnesses. I felt that Falun Gong was good, and that I should continue.
I helped to gather other practitioners' articles critical of Darwin's theory of evolution and those of atheism, and my thoughts became more profound. I discovered that what Master taught us was real science. The old atheistic concepts, stuffed in my head for so long, began to crumble, and were eventually destroyed. Since then I have believed in Master more strongly and cultivated myself more firmly.
2. A Test
When the persecution of Falun Gong began on July 20, 1999, my practitioner son was arrested. Radio and television had not stopped criticizing and slandering the practice. Due to a lack of proper understandings of Dafa, I started questioning the practice myself, and was afraid of being deceived, like during the Cultural Revolution. One day I watched an entire afternoon of TV in which most of contents came from collaborators Liu Fencai, Zhao Jieming and some others who wrote articles slandering Master and Dafa. The Falun Dafa Research Society revealed their deeds among practitioners early in 1999. There was no new content. I felt that this persecution was ludicrous, and came to realize that Falun Gong is the righteous law. My mind became so determined then that I decided to continue cultivating.
My practitioner wife went to Beijing to appeal and was detained for almost six months. In the past, my wife took care of me, and I didn't do anything at home. I was now not only at home alone because of her absence, but I also had to learn to cook and handle chores. In addition, every other week I visited her, and brought her items at the detention center that was miles away. It might sound easy for a middle-aged person, but it was disaster for me, as an older person who wasn't fit to be a housewife. Our combined income was 300 yuan per month after the deduction. When I went out I couldn't afford a restaurant meal. My life was difficult, due not only to the old forces' persecution of my wife, but also due to the tests of my forbearance. Nevertheless, my confidence and independence grew, and I became less fearful.
One day I saw a garbage collector and thought that even if the old forces took all my money, I still had two hands and could make a living using my expertise, or even make a living as a garbage collector.
My son was released from incarceration in 2001, but the persecution didn't stop. 610 Office agents persuaded his employers to fire him, and constantly called him and bullied him to give up Falun Gong. He decided to live in exile and was eventually arrested again and so severely abused that he died. I was unwilling to accept my son's death when I saw his body. He was very smart when he was young and had good grades. He was the pride of the whole family. The old forces took his life, a most unfortunate thing for elderly parents. For us Dafa practitioners, this was the turning point of life and death.
I made a silent oath, that no matter what happened, I would follow Master until the end. I had to let go of sentimentality for my son, and my wife, and I did.
3. Studying the Fa
As Master tells us, a Dafa practitioner's basic duty is to study the Fa, and thorough study will fill our minds with Dafa, which purifies our bodies. My primary way of study is reading Zhuan Falun out loud, and I have also hand-copied the book five or six times over the past several years.
I often read one chapter of Zhuan Falun in the morning and then read Master's new articles in the afternoon, so that I am fully aware of Dafa's current tasks. For example, I learned that practitioners could use some appropriate articles from the Minghui website as contents for Dafa flyers. Some other websites published articles predicting the outcome of the Olympics prior to the Beijing Olympic Games, and some practitioners also discussed topics such as the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) being unable to hold the Olympics and disintegrating.
But in Master's "Fa Teaching Given to the Australian Practitioners" Master mentions that the most important task for Dafa practitioners now is to save people, which is more important than disintegrating the CPP, and that Master is in control of everything, and we should utilize our time to save sentient beings and diligently cultivate Dafa. Based on the above understanding, we only selected contents telling people about the greatness of Falun Dafa and the CCP's persecution, so as to awaken people's kindness and save them.
4. Being a Small Flower - Eliminating Fear
The Minghui website (Chinese version of Clearwisdom.net) is the website Master has designated as the basis for information contained in our fliers. In 2001 we bought a computer. Installing the software that circumvents the Internet blockade has so far allowed us to access Minghui website.
To get on the Minghui website, we experienced initial hesitation, fear, calm, and firmness. We read articles from the website and then shared the articles with other Dafa practitioners after several local Dafa material production centers were destroyed and practitioners lost access to the Minghui articles. Consistent Fa study helped us realize that the three things that practitioners do are the most important tasks. Master and Dafa arrange our environment, and we should eliminate fear and save more people. Once we overcame the fear we bought a laser printer, and copied Master's new articles, cultivation experience articles and truth clarification flyers and brochures, and distributed them to other practitioners and everyday people. Eventually we added a color printer and made a colorful booklet and DVD to explain Falun Gong.
Saving people is a great thing to do, especially during the ongoing persecution. Safety procedures should be considered from two aspects. First, we should act in conformance with the general rules of everyday society, and secondly, we should have righteous thoughts all the time. One practitioner's carelessness will impact the whole group. For safety reasons we choose one-to-one contact only, avoiding unnecessary sharing, and we don't contact anyone we don't know.
We send forth righteous thoughts often and maintain pure minds for making truth clarification materials and distributing them. So far, the old forces have not taken advantage of us. Although making truth clarification materials is not part of cultivation, the process helps us improve our cultivation levels.
We first had to get rid of fear. Whenever there were sensitive dates, rumors would fly about how the evildoers would to do something bad against Dafa practitioners. The Falun Gong website reminded us of safety issues. Sometimes there was some panic, but we increased our righteous thoughts and eliminated the elements of fear to the best of our abilities. In my judgment, only if a practitioner exhibits fear will the persecution continue! No fear, no persecution. This realization made us ignore the possible implications regarding sensitive dates. We do whatever needs to be done.
We also eliminated the attachment to self-interest and profit. We understand that Dafa practitioners' money is Dafa's resources, so it is appropriate to spend money on making truth clarification materials. We use decent equipment, and quality paper and DVDs. We spent all the money for Dafa and did not show off, and were thus able to eliminate the desire for recognition and personal gain.
Cooperation between my wife and I in our Dafa materials distribution center was a priority. Thinking alike made us more productive. As soon as we had an argument, the evils took advantage of us, which sometimes manifested as a paper jam, or a malfunctioning printer. Whenever this happened, we looked inward, discussed the issues, and reached an agreement. As a result our cooperation became better and better.
As practitioners during the Fa-rectification period I tried to do what I'm supposed to do according to Master, and I will do better.