See Through the Perception of Love and Misfortune of Marriage
(Clearwisdom.net) Today, I want to write about the predestined relationships with my family members. Perhaps this can be of some inspiration for my fellow practitioners.
I am 46 years old. I have two older brothers and one younger brother. My parents loved me very much when I was a child, and they went out of their way to satisfy my demands. When I was in school, due to some unknown predestined relationship with a classmate A, there was a sense of closeness between us and a desire to be together. However, as fate would have it, a seemingly beautiful relationship was somehow lost, causing deep regrets and intense yearning for each other. I was emotionally devastated. At that time, I met and married my current husband. However, it was an unhappy marriage. My husband's family is a big family of three generations with many brothers and sisters. We had a son. Before my son turned one month old, I caught a bad post-partum cold after going outdoors to wash my husband's clothes and the baby's cloth diapers. I later suffered from myocarditis and neurosis. I was taking medicine all year round. My child also had myocarditis. My husband never took care of me and the child. I was sick for more than eight years, and I felt that all hope was lost.
In early 1996, I started practicing cultivation. All of my illnesses disappeared, and I felt light all over. Through studying the Fa, I came to understand all that has happened in my life, and it was as if all the knots in my heart were untied. Without complaint or resentment, I tried to be a good person in the family, and my "xinxing" gradually improved. I understood that the meaning of life lies in returning to one's true origin. I feel that there is too much suffering in this world. I set my mind on cultivation, detaching myself from the things in the human world, and continually cultivating myself according to the requirements of Dafa.
In early 2006, I started clarifying the truth to my friends, colleagues, and former classmates. While clarifying the truth with classmates, one of them mentioned classmate A and that his marriage is unhappy and so on. Hearing this has often stirred up in my mind some of the things that happened between us in the past. Some of the thoughts were quite intense and could not be repelled. Sometimes it was so bad that I felt just as miserable as before cultivation, and I even cried. I even thought to use the excuse of clarifying the truth to him in order to see him. However, I disciplined myself with the principles of the Fa. This lasted for a year with a recurring desire to see him, which in the end became weaker and weaker. However, I still could not completely overcome the thought karma. During this time, Master compassionately gave hints to me that this is a huge test and a tribulation that the old forces arranged for me, wanting to use previous predestined relationships and karma to destroy me. I knew that I must keep good control of myself and constantly remind myself that I came here to save people.
One day, I saw that in a previous lifetime my current husband and I were also husband and wife. We had a son, who is the current classmate A. In that lifetime, I had great disdain for my husband and I was just as unhappy. Then I divorced my husband and left the child with him when my son could not even walk. When I was about to leave home, my son held his arms tight around my neck, his cheek pressed against mine, and he cried with tears trickling down his face. He had childhood rickets and could not take care of himself. He later died of the illness.
Looking back, I see that all of the misfortunes in this life are to repay the debts of the previous life. Now I understand that to treat others well is to treat oneself well. One should not create karma.