There's No Stopping on the Diligent Path
No matter how many times I was deceived, how much suffering I endured, or how much money I spent, I finally found the genuine Teacher who has waited for me for tens of thousands years! Although I experienced nine years of tribulations and hardships, with Teacher's protection, I have been able to walk my path, and I shall follow Teacher to eternity; I will not leave or abandon my path, but be steadfast!
Going to Beijing Twice
The evil persecution which began in July 1999 disrupted Falun Dafa practitioners' practice. In the face of attack and slander for no reason, whether you step forward or back out, it became a choice of life or death for every practitioner.
"You cannot always rely on me to bring you up to a higher level while you, yourself do not move. Only after the Fa is explicitly stated do you make a move. If it is not taught clearly, you do not move, or move backward. I cannot recognize such behavior as cultivation practice. At the crucial moment when I ask you to break away from humanness, you do not follow me. Each opportunity will not occur again. Cultivation practice is a serious matter. The distance has become greater and greater. It is extremely dangerous to add anything human to cultivation practice. In fact, it is also fine to just be a good person. But you must be clear that you choose your own path." ("Digging Out the Roots" from Essentials for Further Advancement)
I enlightened from this Fa principle that one must be prepared mentally. So, I resolutely boarded a train to Beijing and proceeded to Tiananmen Square. With Teacher's protection, I met several fellow practitioners from the northeast. Together, we stayed seven to eight days in Beijing, which was full of spies and police. Although our plans to validate the Fa failed, every practitioner's heart was confident in the face of life or death, all the while firmly protecting Dafa which was brighter and more precious than gold.
However, something mysterious happened that is worth mentioning. In July 1999, Beijing was bursting at the seams with evil; it was crawling everywhere as if it were having difficulty being covered by a lid under a roaring fire. All the main streets or small lanes had people throwing vicious slandering and attacks against Falun Dafa. As a result, people felt quite constrained and agitated. I wanted to find a quiet and cool place for a rest, but where could I go? A library that happened to be close by had central air-conditioning and seemed quiet. I walked inside to a bookshelf and happened to see this book, The Centuries, which I casually skimmed through. Then I saw the passage, "In the year 1999, seventh month, from the sky will come a great King of Terror." I suddenly understood everything, with all my doubts, worries, disconsolation, helplessness, and fears all cleared up. I realized that this was directly reminding me of the reason and truth of this persecution. Merciful Teacher is protecting practitioners at all times. Hence, what should we feel confused about? Smiling, I walked out of the library and went to look for fellow practitioners, and then later safely returned home.
At the end of December 2000, several practitioners and I again stood on Tiananmen Square to unfurl banners and shout "Falun Dafa is good!" Though we were taken away and detained, I again safely returned home with protection from Teacher. Teacher does not stop his protection of practitioners for even one minute or one second; it is just that practitioners don't realize this when they are confused by attachments and notions. In such a maze, such a disturbance and such a fake environment, every practitioner was tested to see if they had solid faith in Teacher and Dafa. We will never know how much Teacher does for us, however in return, we can only be diligent to repay even a tiny bit to merciful Teacher! In the unprecedented persecution, I once again witnessed Teacher's mercy and Dafa's supernatural powers.
Our Materials Production Site: A "Little Flower" Fragrant with Compassion
Last year, I got to know a fellow practitioner and, with her help, we established a material production site which was responsible for printing pamphlets, other materials, and burning CDs. I thought that my enlightenment quality and practice was good, but I encountered unprecedented tests. These difficult tribulations made me realize even more the seriousness of cultivation practice and the importance of looking inward. Hence, my impatient and impulsive heart gradually calmed down, and my practice became more solid.
What tested me the most was the printer. If I was not diligent or had attachments appearing for a few days, I would immediately get angry, making me quite anxious and helpless. In February of this year, a fellow practitioner had sent me a brand name printer, but it leaked ink even before it started to work. No reasons for the leak could be found, so I had no choice but to get a brand-new, more expensive model. To compound the problem, this new printer could not connect to the power source well. In order to get it working, I tried all kinds of methods, and even carelessly used it for several months and burned it out. Fellow practitioners asked me to look inward which I did and indeed found many attachments that I subsequently eliminated. But at the time I did not know what else to look for and felt unable to find more. A fellow practitioner sent me another printer which she connected and tested for me. This printer worked just fine. However, right after she left, the printer stopped working, and no matter how I tried, it would not work. I was so anxious that I knelt in front of Teacher's portrait and cried.
With hints from Teacher, I finally dug out the roots of irritability and bad temper, imposing my views on others whenever I spoke, ego, selfishness, anger whenever others did not conform to my notions, and lack of consideration for whether others could endure or be harmed by my actions. I realized I had conformed to none of the three characteristics of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance, but thought at least I was kind and good-hearted. However, when I dug even deeper, I was shocked at my attachment of fighting, showing off, and remaining resentment from the Communist Party culture. I felt very disappointed in myself. What could I do? Of course, I could not tolerate these problems, so I tried firmly eradicating them and improving my moral character. Also, I could not be too slow, delaying the important matter of saving sentient beings.
"The Fa can break all attachments, the Fa can destroy all evil, the Fa can shatter all lies, and the Fa can strengthen righteous thoughts." ("Drive out Interference" from Essentials for Further Advancement II)
Along with enhancement of my moral character and increase of Fa study time, my impetuous personality calmed down. After enduring pain in the area of my liver for three days, I was no longer bad tempered. I understood that Teacher took out bad things for me, thus eliminating my demon nature, and increasing my Buddha nature. Without Teacher's protection, I really cannot improve even one step. I did not even realize many variations of my notions and attachments! How could I abandon them? Therefore I say that without Teacher, discussing practice is like talking nonsense or like an armchair strategist.
In two years of solid cultivation while making the materials, I truly realized that cultivation practice is extremely serious. I also tasted the benefit of looking inward. The weight of sentient beings in my heart became heavier, while the weight of myself lessened. When an earthquake occurred in our local area, I saw many disturbed and fearful people feeling helpless like ants on a hot pot all over the streets. They were extremely anxious and impatient, as they could not find their family members through cell phones, regardless of their wealth or poverty. They revealed fear of death and hope of survival. Upon seeing such scenes, my compassion suddenly came out. I advised grief-stricken people, hoped there would be no disaster, and took no joy in the punishment of evildoers. I only had one thought: "As long as they live, it is good that they can have a chance of learning the truth, thus they have a chance of being saved." Actually, when understanding that many lives will be forever eliminated if they do not know the truth, practitioners can only hope that this time will be extended. This experience helped me learn not to have any attachments about the Olympics. When I saw some practitioners waiver in their faith in Teacher and even accuse Teacher due to their attachments to time not being satisfied and the persecution not ending as expected, I felt extremely sad. Muddled fellow practitioners, how can you expect merciful Teacher to ignore lives like you? How can you put yourselves ahead of Teacher's Fa? How can you use human notions to discuss and even direct Teacher who has sacrificed all for you? Please awaken quickly! Fellow practitioners who are so attached to consummation, please check yourself! Can you be a qualified Buddha, Dao or God? Have you "abandoned all attachments without omission?" Any attachment hinders your from reaching consummation!
I feel fortunate to have established a family material production site. My sixty-year-old mother also contributes to the material production site. Merciful Teacher strengthened her and opened up her wisdom once again. She mainly burns CDs and prints pamphlets. This is indeed a miracle. This "little flower" is able to send out compassionate fragrance. We merely pay a bit with our efforts. All things are actually done by Teacher. During the process of doing Dafa work, we abandon human notions and attachments while elevating our xinxing and levels. Recently, I again experienced a difficult tribulation. Five short days in the human world appeared to be five thousand years in other dimensions. Bad things turned into good things when I dug out the root of sentimentality which remained in my body for a thousand years! My tribulation of sentimentality finally ended completely, as I eradicated interference from the demons of sentiment and lust, breeding demons in my own mind, and the demon of sleepiness. My body and mind are now transparent and light. All sorts of joy from within are quite wonderful, but difficult to express in words. As long as we have faith in Teacher and Dafa, cultivation practice is not hard. Eliminating human notions is extremely important to practitioners. Footprints increase one after another, and attachments are removed layer by layer, with a wonderful future awaiting ahead.
Humans going through the reincarnation process receive the retribution of karma endlessly, having no alternative, but to withstand pain and not knowing when the end will come. I thank Teacher for choosing and saving me and protecting me in hardship and dangers, so that I could arrive at this point today. I also thank Teacher for not giving up on me and shutting me out when I fell, and picking me up again to join the one body of Dafa practitioners. In addition, I thank Teacher for giving us Zhuan Falun, the ladder to the heaven. I simply can't imagine what kind of dangerous situation I would be in without Dafa, or perhaps I would even have already lost my life. Whenever I read the section "Whoever Practices Cultivation Will Attain Gong" in Lecture Eight, I cannot hold back my tears and feel infinitely grateful. To a person who only pursues genuine Fa and Dao, richness, honor, power, and influence are like mud, and even to be an emperor would be senseless. I was fortunate to meet Teacher who imparted to us this great Fa and genuine Dao! For practitioners who truly cherish Him, no attachment can block their striving forward! I indeed have no other pursuit as I am satisfied to have merciful Teacher! Practitioners only need to save more people and assimilate to Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance 100%, and be a qualified particle without any gaps.
My gratitude to Teacher cannot be expressed with human words. I can only say: "Thank you Teacher for taking the troubles from practitioners." I hope to reunite with Teacher soon; I also hope I have no qualms in my heart on the day of kneeling down to thank Teacher. And I hope all fellow practitioners will be mature, rational and achieve the standards of the Fa. Let our Teacher no longer have to work so hard, but only have joy!
Due to my limited understanding, if there are any mistakes, please point them out.