“The Pain in My Heart Has Left Since Practicing Falun Gong”
(Clearwisdom.net) Four members of my family began to practice Falun Gong more than three years ago. Since then, we have been led by the “Fa.” We follow the Fa step by step, our minds are solid, and our faith is firm.
I used to be bad-tempered and was easily annoyed, without patience. Before my husband practiced Falun Gong, he liked gambling and drinking. He had many bad habits and his mood could dramatically change in a moment, like a bomb without a timer. Our relationship became so bad that our marriage had almost reached its end. I endured it for 17 years for the children, until I began to practice Falun Gong, which greatly changed my life.
At the beginning of our practice, my husband still enjoyed gambling and alcohol. We run an auto-body shop. Once, my husband said that he needed to go out to repair a car, and he was gone for the whole day. I knew what he was up to. That day, so many clients came to the shop. I waited for a long time and my anger built up like a fire. Just as Master said, when my husband stepped in the door, I threw a fit right in his face. Then, Master's poem “Tempering the Will” came to mind. It was so difficult to let go of those attachments!
“To consummate yourself, reaping Buddhahood,
Let joy be found in hardship.
Physical pains count little as suffering,
Indeed, cultivating mind is hardest.
Each and every barrier must be broken through,
And everywhere does evil lurk.
Abundant troubles rain down together,
All to see: Can you pull through?
The world’s miseries endured,
One departs the earth a Buddha.”
“Tempering the Will” from “Hong Yin” (Translation Version A)
The next day, my husband went out again without doing his work. Although he had been doing this for so many years, I still could not keep calm. I could not sit or stand still and there was a severe pain in my heart. My husband seemed to act worse and worse, not caring about his cultivation. However, my faith remained steadfast. I looked at Master's photo when I held the book Hong Yin, not noticing the tears flowing down my face. When my husband returned, it was the first time that I was not angry. I thought I should not be so threatening. Although he had made many mistakes, I was not perfect myself. I was not acting like a good person because I was so aggressive when I thought I was right. After that, about three months after he started to cultivate, my husband got rid of his bad habits completely.
In the past, I went everywhere to pray to Buddhas and heavenly beings, but it was not effective. The pain in my heart has left since practicing Falun Gong. It is so painful when I look back, but now I can declare publicly: “Only when we cultivate can we change our lives. Let go of all human notions, pursue nothing and gain naturally! Even if the sky collapsed, Master would help us rise up.” I hope everyone will not miss this chance that cannot be found for thousands of years.