(Clearwisdom.net) Do I choose to be upset with others? Or do I choose to cultivate myself instead? This is a choice that differentiates a non-cultivator from a cultivator. We have been cultivating for a long time. It is now the late stage of the Fa-rectification. As practitioners, our divine side should dominate. On the other hand, we must not be carried away by self-complacency or feel self-important and thus forget to cultivate ourselves. When we face interpersonal conflicts, especially with our family members or fellow practitioners, we must not become upset. Instead, we should earnestly cultivate our own minds. This is a crucial criterion for evaluating a cultivator's level.

1. We should understand, trust and forgive other people. We should keep a compassionate heart at all times.

2. When we see faults in another person, we should search within because everything we encounter has something to do with our mentality. When a third cultivator witnesses two cultivators arguing, he or she is required to search inward, the same as the two arguing cultivators.

3. People around us provide us with different cultivation environments. If we avoid pointing out problems or shower each other with praise all day long, there wouldn't be any opportunity for us to cultivate. A true cultivator stands out as calm and peaceful amidst conflicts. If everyone refuses to communicate with you, you won't have any opportunity to upgrade your xinxing.

4. Happiness is sentimentality, so is being upset. We should learn not to be upset during our cultivation practice. In fact, we should have eliminated sentimentality and replaced it with compassion a long time ago.

5. "It would be good if they could manage to search within themselves for the things that they have been able to find in others." ("A Dialogue with Time" in Essentials for Further Advancement) Then we will be able to identify our problems.

6. If a person is really rude to you, it is likely that you have owed him or her in the past. These are all your tribulations. When a person is rude to you, he or she is helping you eliminate karma, so you must not be upset or the karma will not be removed.

7. If a person in conflict with you is really in the wrong, there is no need to be upset. If the person is not a cultivator, what he does will determine his fate. If the person is a fellow practitioner, you shouldn't demand apology from him or her because we each have our own cultivation paths. If we become upset and are rude in return, aren't we pushing de (virtue) back to him or her?