My Cultivation Experience
I feel so fortunate to have obtained Dafa in April of 1996. It was a sunny day when I went to an experience sharing conference held in the auditorium of the No. 18 Institute of the Handan Iron and Steel Group Chemical Company Ltd. I sat there and listened from morning until 1:00 p.m. That evening I asked my son to lend me the precious book, Zhuan Falun. I finished reading the book in three days. Because I realized the value and preciousness of the book, I wanted to keep reading it every day, and still do. I also listened to Dafa lectures on tape cassettes and watched the videotapes. I strived to conduct myself according to Dafa's requirements, and my mind was expanding continuously. Master often prompted me to do the exercises, and purified my body for me.
I used to suffer from breast tissue hyperplasia, adnexitis, stomatitis and many types of ailments of the reproductive system. I often had pain that lasted up to 15 days at a time. If someone accidentally bumped the front of my body, I would be in great pain. After I started practicing Falun Gong, however, I took my recorder at 4:00 a.m. and went to the practice site to do the exercises. I joined group Fa study in the evening, and my xinxing improved quickly. All of my illnesses completely disappeared, and I felt very lighthearted. Dafa became the most important thing in my life, and I wanted to spend my spare time on it. I wanted to share it with others, so I went to the nearby villages to teach the exercises.
First, fellow practitioners and I went to Yaozhanbao Township to spread Dafa. We biked over 37 miles roundtrip. The streets were full of potholes but we were very happy. When we arrived at the village someone asked us, "How much do you charge for a day of teaching?" I answered, "We don't want money. We teach for free!" At first the villagers didn't believe us. They thought, "There is no free lunch."
When we entered a village, people from neighboring villages also came. One time there were about 200 people who gathered to learn. Master encouraged me when I was doing the exercises, and I saw rainbow-colored light and beautiful flowers through my celestial vision. We encountered bone-chilling wind and snow on our way home. I was slower and fell behind the other practitioners. My feet were frozen and I could not get off the bike, yet I enjoyed overcoming the difficulties. I saw Master's image in my mind and He was smiling. Now, I really miss the cultivation environment Master created for us back then.
On April 11, 1999, four practitioners including me went to Huade County to spread Dafa. We arrived at a narrow street covered with fine sand. There was snow on the street, and the snow swirling around in the wind found its way under our shirt collars. The sun rarely came out. Two practitioners taught at one village. One practitioner held the recorder and another practitioner put up banners. We taught the exercises at noon and played the instruction video in the evening. We sat among the villagers. One practitioner asked me, "How old are you; early 30s maybe? You have a really healthy glow." I answered, "I'm over 50 years old. I used to be extremely sick. I spent over 100 yuan each month on medication and still lived in pain more than half the time. Master saved me and made me healthy. I look young because those illnesses are gone. My body feels so light."
Sometimes my self-centeredness and human emotions emerged when spreading Dafa. With Master's prompts and protection I continuously corrected myself. I constantly upgraded my xinxing, and I grew braver. Once, to finish some task, I took the bus by myself to Shangyi County, which was a remote distance from my home. My purpose was to take Master's new articles there and return some lecture audiocassettes. It was early July, 1999, and at the time the police was searching every bus to find Falun Gong practitioners on their way to Beijing to appeal. My trip was very smooth. I felt almost as though I was on a private bus, because Master was protecting me. One practice site assistant asked me to stay and play Master's lecture tapes. I said, "I must return right now, because more than 20 people are at my home waiting to watch Master's lecture tapes!" I left and looked for a bus, and what a coincidence! It was the same bus I took earlier that morning. I got on the bus and put my things beside me. The police came on the bus and asked the driver, "Who is she?" The driver pointed at me and said, "That's my relative." With Master's benevolent protection, I didn't have any fear and returned safely.
The persecution started on July 20, 1999. On August 29, 1999, we held a Fa conference at a practitioner's home in the Zhongshi District, Zhangjiakou City. Twenty-nine of us were illegally arrested. The perpetrators were officers from the Hongqilou Police Department. At the police department we recited "Hong Yin," and clarified the truth to the police officers assigned to monitor us. They didn't know what to do. One officer said, "If I keep watching you guys I'll end up practicing Falun Gong myself. Stop telling me about it." Later, 12 of us were sent to a brainwashing class held at the Qiaodong Party School. We were forbidden to sleep for days on end, and forced to watch slanderous videos. Because all of us resisted these Dafa-slandering things, the graphics disappeared from the screen on the third night. They ordered us to write a guarantee statement to promise not to practice Falun Gong or go to Beijing to appeal. We refused, and they forced us to stand for a whole night. At noon they made us stand outside in the sweltering heat and didn't allow us to eat or drink. They also didn't permit our families to visit us. Police officers stood in a circle and hurled insults at us.
Because I had attachments that I had not relinquished, I reluctantly give up Dafa during the persecution. The police extorted 1,100 yuan from my family without issuing any paperwork. After this tribulation I eliminated my attachments and corrected myself through Fa study, and I soon dove back into the current of Fa rectification.
On December 31, 2000, I took a train to Beijing and shouted my heartfelt words, "Falun Dafa is good!" A dozen police officers abducted me and took me to the Tiananmen Police Department where more than 200 practitioners were already being held. We studied the Fa together and our voices suppressed the evil. They later transferred me to the Chaoyang District Police Department. Because I had fear, I was tricked into giving my name and address. I was subsequently sent to the Hongqilou Police Department in Zhangjiakou City.
I was tortured with the tiger bench for three days and three nights. Jia Cheng, the affairs division secretary, searched me and took 50 yuan from me. The head of the police department named He, extorted 3,000 yuan from my son. Gao, head of the factory security section, deducted 3,000 yuan from my salary and subjected me to an illegal fine of 10,000 yuan. Perpetrators from the Hongqilou Affairs Division ransacked my home and stole my TV and refrigerator. Four to seven perpetrators from the Hongqilou Affairs Division came to my home daily to harass me. They tried to put me in a police car but I refused to cooperate with them. Deng, Lu and Wang from the factory's 610 Office also came to harass me daily. I could not quiet my mind to concentrate on Fa study. The attachments I clung to tortured me for over a month. With help from Master I improved amidst the tribulation.
On April 14, 2001, four police officers, including the head of the police department, abducted me and took me to the Hongqilou Police Department. They took all of my Dafa books and Master's pictures. They didn't have any warrant to search my home. They later sent me to the Xuanhua Police Department where I was savagely tortured and illegally held for 102 days. I was severely traumatized by the tortures I suffered at the Xuanhua Police Department. I had been unable to study the Fa for a long time when I got home from the police department and I anxiously looked for Dafa books (as mine had been stolen). Other practitioners quickly gave me some Dafa books. People from the police department, the street party committee and the neighborhood committee surrounded my home and harassed me even more severely on so-called sensitive days. To avoid additional harassment from the evildoers I returned to my hometown and located about six practitioners. We studied the Fa together.
My hometown was a great place for me to clarify the truth and offer salvation to sentient beings. My relatives all came to visit me, and I clarified the truth and validated the wonders of Dafa with my superb physical condition. I told them about the shamelessness and brutality of this persecution and told them it's completely based on lies. During truth clarification I deeply felt that Dafa practitioners should openly clarify the truth and judge themselves according to the Fa. Truth clarification is a process to eliminate fear and a process to offer sentient beings salvation; it is also a process to negate the old forces' arrangements and build mighty virtue. Compared to how I conducted myself in the past, I see that I used to have fear when clarifying the truth. I used to avoid plainclothes police officers and other types of police. I did not clarify the truth to people wearing an emblem on their sleeves, thinking they were government officials. The way I conducted myself at that time conformed to the old forces' arrangements. As a result, I often experienced interference where none of my family members supported me, because they were afraid of being implicated should I get abducted again. I was exhausted from having to constantly deal with the interference. I was most happy when I did Dafa work, and my heart was most content when I sat down and studied Dafa. After I studied Dafa my heart quickly calmed down and all troubles disappeared.
I went to each shop in the street to clarify the truth to them, regardless of whether they were large supermarkets or small private shops. I delivered truth clarification materials to each one of them and joined group Fa study in the evening. I feel that I have been taking each step with Master tugging me along. He helped me get up and keep going forward after I tripped and fell down. Many times after I studied Dafa, I felt certain things I had done were letting down our benevolent Master and Dafa. Later, I published an announcement on the Minghui website to void all of my words and actions said and done as a result of being under pressure. I said I would make up for the losses I caused Dafa, and firmly refuse to acknowledge any form of persecution imposed on me by the old forces and the dark minions. I will closely follow Master and keep cultivating until the end.
I was relieved after I published the announcement. By then I had overcome many attachments and was really trying my best to do whatever Dafa required. I clarified the truth to predestined people on the way to and from my grandson's kindergarten class. The articles by fellow practitioners on the Minghui website also truly helped me to clarify the truth better.
I found out that I had heavy human attachments. I would become complacent when I clarified the truth well, and upset if I did not do so well. Sometimes it is difficult for me to accept it if someone opposes me or is rude to me. That's why truth clarification is a process to cultivate and improve.
In the past few years I have eliminated many human attachments through clarifying the truth to people. I just wanted to share with fellow practitioners my strengths and shortcomings over the past six years. Please benevolently point out anything inappropriate!