Let Go of the Attachment to "Qing" and Steadfastly Cultivate Xinxing
(Clearwisdom.net) I started to practice Falun Dafa in April of 2003. In August 2005, although I studied the Fa, sent righteous thoughts and did the exercises every day, I was not calm or clearheaded. Often, I had leg pain and sometimes I felt weak all over my body. There was a lot of interference.
On September 2, 2005, at around 1 a.m., I dreamt that while I was talking with several people, a letter was sent to me saying someone was coming. Then, I saw one of the perpetrators from Jiang's regime walk past me. Numerous faceless communist evil spirits and dark minions followed him.
These evil spirits and dark minions then encircled me, forming three rows. They wanted to fight with me. I immediately erected my palm in front of my chest to send forth righteous thoughts. The biggest evil spirit in front of me, with a horrifying expression, threatened me. My heart slightly trembled, but I wasn't scared. I sent forth strong righteous thoughts and in no time, the evil beings were eliminated one after another. I then woke up from the dream. At around 2 a.m., I started to experience physical interference. I had pain in my abdomen and 20 minutes later, I started to vomit and had diarrhea. I tolerated the excruciating pain and thought to myself, "Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance is good," and "Falun Dafa is good." With righteous thoughts, I denied and eliminated the old forces and the communist evil specter's arrangements. I had only one thought in my head, "I am a Fa-rectification Dafa practitioner and I will only accept what Teacher arranges for me and nothing else." That night, all of my physical discomfort disappeared. The next morning, I sent righteous thoughts every hour and did the exercises. I was able to go from 60 minutes to 90 minutes when I did the sitting meditation and I felt my body become light.
Through studying the Fa calmly, and while sending righteous thoughts, I better understood what Teacher said in "Dafa Disciples' Righteous Thoughts are Powerful" from Essentials for Further Advancement II. Teacher said,
"Actually, every Dafa disciple has abilities. It's just that the abilities do not manifest in the surface dimension, so they think that they don't have supernormal abilities. But regardless of whether they can manifest in the surface dimension or not, when a person's True Thoughts come forth they are very powerful."
Also, in Zhuan Falun, Teacher said,
"Amidst your critical self-interests, are you moved? Amidst interpersonal mind games, are you moved? When your friends or family suffer, are you moved? How do you weigh them? This is how difficult it is to be a practitioner!"
In "Teaching the Fa at the 2004 International Fa Conference in New York," Teacher tells us that,
"If a person wants to be saved, he must transcend the fact that he is in and experiencing firsthand a tough environment where there is adversity, self interest, emotions and desires. Everything will involve a cultivator's self-interest, and anything can affect you as a person, your thoughts and emotions, your xinxing, and the things that you are attached to inside. If you manage to take a certain path and make certain choices, then you are extraordinary. Otherwise, you are an ordinary person. If you are able to step out of the reasoning and attachments of ordinary people, then you are a god."
After I calmly studied the Fa and measured myself with the Fa's standards, I realized why I was interfered with when studying the Fa and doing the exercises. First, although I studied the Fa and did the exercises every day, my mind was constantly wandering. I was also worried about the daily household chores. As a result, I was studying and doing the exercises in vain. My mind wasn't on the Fa. Secondly, since last June, I have been attached to the trivial details of my children's wedding preparations. I was not in the state of a practitioner. Instead, I was walking on the path of an everyday person attached to the qing of family. I was walking on the path of the old forces' arrangements and was therefore easily interfered with.
The intention of my writing down and sharing this experience with everyone is to expose the evil elements in my dimension and eliminate them. At the same time, I hope to remind both myself and others of this issue and to be aware of it. From now on, I will study the Fa and do the exercises with a clear mind. I will also diligently practice according to Teacher's requirements to do the three things well and assist Teacher in Fa-rectification.
The above is my personal understanding. Please compassionately point out anything that is incorrect.