It's So Good to Be Home---My Trip to Beijing
In order to save the innocent lives that are being deceived by Jiang's regime, on January 21, 2002, I went on a trip to China. I never took the time or energy to think of the danger to my own life, I could only admire the courage and endurance of the Falun Gong practitioners who stand up and protect Zhen-Shan-Ren (Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance) in China despite being mercilessly persecuted even to death for the past 2 1/2 years.
I feel so deeply about what they are doing that I wanted to share with them all the encouragement and support and best wishes that I got from people around the world while I was on the SOS! Urgent RescueWalk of the Falun Gong Practitioners Persecuted in China. Because the Chinese President has locked China up, no truth can go in and no truth can get out unless in secret, I knew I had to take this good news to my fellow practitioners into China by myself.
After 5 months of travel and visiting over 14 countries and more than 30 cities across southern Europe from Portugal to Turkey, I knew an overwhelming outpouring of hearts were with our practitioners in spirit. When we were on a tour of the northern territories from the Yukon to Inuvik including north of the Arctic Circle, an elderly gentleman, the Mayor of a small town named Inuit, issued a statement saying, " Man is not on this earth to torture other men, it must be stopped. Tell everyone Canadians support peaceful, good people."
Everywhere I went I let everyone know that Falun Dafa practitioners are peaceful, good people. I always did the exercises and let them experience this peacefulness themselves.
I wanted to remind Chinese people that Falun Dafa comes from ancient Chinese culture. All their honourable ancestors practised cultivation and followed Zhen-Shan-Ren. I think they knew back then that these 3 words are the heart of life.
I wanted to tell the Chinese people that they are being deceived by lies from their own government to force them to help in the persecution of Falun Gong and they must stop for the sake of their ancient culture and for their own future.
Eliminate Evil Interference with Righteous Thoughts
About one week before my plane departure I phoned my son for any last minute advice. He exploded with concern. I told him to look inside and read the book more. I said I read Master's latest articles often.
I hung up the phone and I shattered. Everything bad anyone had ever said to me attacked me over and over again in my mind. I lost my confidence. Doubts, confusion, inadequacies, fears, yearning for home, and parties and festivals I had missed by being here on this walk made me feel homesick and my body began to tremble and then to shake uncontrollably. I called out "Oh Master, is this what it means to be falling?" My hands shook too much to hold the book. But I started to recite "Lunyu" and "The Knowing Heart" over and over again. A tiny voice from inside my core called out over and over, "I am a cultivator. I am a cultivator." I recalled Teacher's words something like "everything that happens to you is for your good, for you to discover what attachments you must let go of." I repeated "deserting capsized boats and torn sails...As the mud and sand are completely sifted..." ("The Knowing Heart") Then I remembered more of Master's words, "My fashen know everything--they know everything on your mind, and they can do anything. They will not take care of you if you do not practice cultivation. If you practice cultivation, they will help you all the way to the end." (Lecture 4 in Zhuan Falun) In a flash my body stopped shaking, tears spewed from my eyes and I vowed I was a true cultivator. I began feeling warm and my thoughts cleared and I sent forth righteous thoughts and eliminated all evil interference.
Now a clear mind, reasoning and wisdom kicked in. How could I be afraid of going to another country when I had worn that SOS banner and been treated with dignity, respect and honour in so many countries all across the world. I recognized it was simply evil nonsense interfering with me. I crushed the memory of it and thought it dead and it was gone as Master said it would be.
I know I had been solidly cultivating for the last 4 years. I know I have always been responsible to the Fa even in my most miserable tribulations. I reinforced myself with the thoughts of all the people I had introduced the Fa to, all the libraries I had given books to, all the practice sites I had arranged, all the classes I had done, all the speeches I had written describing my adventures with the Fa and the peacefulness I received by doing the practice. I know reading the book has always been my priority. I still get up at 5 a.m. or so and read. Each time the thrill of the newness of the words makes me smile and I become amazed by what new message will be revealed today. It's always a surprise to me. My inner self calmed down into the Fa again and I knew I would go to Tiananmen Square to validate the Fa because I was truly a particle and it was time to step forward fearlessly once again to let the evil know me and for it to be afraid of what I represent, which is the real truth of the universe.
I had stepped forward to appeal as a Fa-rectification disciple before in front of the Chinese Consulate for 300 hours after the Chinese President ordered extermination of Falun Gong in February 2001 and 15 women were found mass-murdered in June and 10 men tortured to death in July.
The persecution must be stopped. I booked my ticket to China. I packed my suitcase and kept in righteous thoughts. The little group of practitioners where I was visiting nurtured me when they found out my plans. I covered my book Zhuan Falun with white plastic so I would be able to read it anywhere in safety. I finished reading the whole book in one day and felt wrapped in a golden cocoon. I was calm and naturally at peace when it was time to go. I knew I was doing the right thing.
Singing "Falun Dafa Hao (Falun Dafa is Good)" in Tiananmen Square
During the flight whenever my nerves acted up I eliminated the evil and felt I was floating in the Fa all the way to China. Every Chinese person I met helped me. I arrived at noon and walked to the Forbidden City and the Square and took pictures like any other tourist. The sun was brilliantly warm as the enlightened beings welcomed me. People on the street called out "Welcome" to me too. I knew they saw the Fa in me. Later I exercised and read in my hotel room and sewed the red and white SOS Falun Dafa Truth Walk banner on my suit jacket.
In the morning of January 23, 2002, I exercised and read my book. I finished sewing on the banner and put the ends into my coat pocket and buttoned up my coat. Everyone smiled at me as I walked to Tiananmen Square. It was a beautiful warm sunny day. Many asked to take a picture with me as I walked along. I said OK. At Tiananmen Square I joined everyone and took pictures too with my camera. I intended to start my walk at 1:30 p.m. but was told others would start at 2:00 p.m., so I waited. At 1:30 p.m., there were many people with cameras but by 2:00 p.m., I could see no cameras. I thought of Teacher's words about stepping forward when there is a crowd but if no one does then you go home. I looked around, the guards in long green coats were changing guard and passing gloves to each other, I said to myself I'm not going back yet.
I have to deliver those Good Luck messages from all the countries I had visited. Then I dropped my coat on the ground, raised my arms and started to sing the "Falun Dafa Hao" song. I kept walking back and forth singing in front of the flag of China. The guard in green looked at me as he passed but no one did anything until someone from a group of about 100 Chinese people who were watching me said "Falun Dafa." Then a plainclothes officer came to look. He kept asking Falun Dafa? Falun Dafa? I sang "Falun Dafa Hao" and he grabbed my arm and began dragging me into the center of the Square. Someone ran up to him and he stopped and took hold of the banner and ripped it off my suit jacket. It took about 7 good yanks to break all the threads. I kept singing "Falun Dafa Hao." Then he grabbed my arm and dragged me back towards the place he first pulled me away from. My voice got louder. He tried to pull my arms down. He tugged and tugged but couldn't pull my arm down. I seemed to have incredible strength. He just said, "Falun Gong!" and gave up. I smiled at him and kept singing "Falun Dafa Hao."
You Must Respect this Banner
He found a parked police van and he pushed me into it. The driver began driving and suddenly veered off into a huge circle. I thought "wow" righteous thoughts are so powerful! The police demanded a name card from a photographer standing there with all her cameras and then drove off to the police station.
They asked me to go into a room and sit on a chair. Dozens of police officers crowded into the room to look at me. Someone came and took the banner and put it down on the floor and stretched it out looked at it and pushed it with his foot. I stood up. All the policemen yelled at me in Chinese. I waved my finger at them and pointed at the banner, "You put that banner up here on the table." I repeated, "You put that banner up here on the table now." I told them, "You must respect that banner. It has visited over 14 countries and has always been treated with honour and you must honour it too." They picked up the banner and gently opened it up on the table. I sat down and kept eliminating the evil. I told them what the SOS and the banner represented and that I was there to bring encouragement and support and good wishes to all Falun Gong practitioners in China because people all over the world are proud of what they are doing as they stand up for and protect Zhen-Shan-Ren.
Clarify the Truth and Expose the Evil at the Police Station
Soon they moved me to another bigger police station. There I was questioned for 3 or 4 hours by a female high-ranking official with a translator.
She told me that I had broken a law in China and I must be punished. I told them I had nothing to say unless I had a lawyer. I took out my book Zhuan Falun and began to read it. The lady said she would just say some things so I could learn more about Chinese culture and asked if I would I listen to her. I listened. She said I had broken the law in China and must be punished, just as if I had broken the law in Canada. I told her your law hurts innocent people and forces people to torture others to death. In Canada we have no laws that hurt other people or order people to be tortured to death. If there were one we would vote it out. It's too bad you don't do the same. I said your law not only turns you against your own people and makes you persecute them to death but it is a bad law because it stops people from visiting their moms and dads. How can anyone follow a law that stops someone from visiting their mom and dad? You might as well have a law against the air coming down or against the sun shining or against breathing in and out or stopping your heart from beating. You can't stop Falun Dafa because it's the law of the universe. It grows in your heart and it's part of your ancient culture. All your honourable ancestors practiced cultivation and followed Zhen-Shan-Ren.
I told them of the story someone told me about gentlemen in ancient China who stopped every 15 minutes and went inside and asked themselves, "Have I been kind to everyone I've met in the last 15 minutes? Have I hurt anyone? How can I get to be a better person?" They smiled and nodded. I said Falun Dafa is getting us to be more like that. I told them, "You don't need a law to know if something is good or bad. Just let everyone try it. If it is good, it will exist; if it is bad, it will stop." I told them they may not be aware because their president keeps news from the outside world out of China but there is a World Court at Hague in Holland. And this court tries people for crimes against humanity which means those who torture people to death and even those who help them have to pay for their wrongdoings, justice must be served for the harm they did. Both the officer and the translator were visibly shaken.
I said, "Your president has deceived you by telling you lies. Falun Dafa has been practiced in the West for 7 years now and there are no deaths or cases of murders or insanities. Why are there so many reported by your government without 3rd person verification? You keep telling me there are no murders going on and I tell you that we have hundreds of documented cases. Reports from the United Nations and Amnesty International prove what you have been told about Falun Gong by your president are all lies. Other evidence is being gathered to present to the world court too."
The female interrogator said she was at the square and witnessed the self-immolation. I said, "Then you must know the truth. We have analyzed the very same video footage that your government made and spread across the world. After slowing it down, it's evident that the burnings were a set up. It was staged. It clearly shows the woman who is running and burning gets hit on the head to make her fall down dead." Also I told them that Western reporters are very curious. They always want to get to the truth and they have come into China and talked to people who knew those people and they proved none of these people were Falun Gong practitioners as the Chinese government claimed.
Over the hours the female interrogator and I developed a mother to mother rapport. She asked if I had any children and how old they were. Both the translator and she smiled and shook their heads at the ages of my children. They said I looked too young. I smiled and said Falun Dafa makes me young and full of energy. She asked if I had any grandchildren. I said my sons are not married but I feel as if all Falun Gong practitioners are my children and that's another reason I was there because I care so much for all my family. The lady asked me if I knew the Chinese way of having animals represent the year. I said our newspapers have articles about all that and I am a dragon. She looked at her papers and said I was a rabbit. I said I wish I could speak Chinese because we have so much we can talk about. She asked if I knew about Chinese families and I told her each country has family values for all of us to learn more about each other.
I told her that life is so precious and that's why Falun Gong practitioners would never kill anyone. As cultivators we cherish each moment because each moment we can get purer and learn how to be kinder and more caring. Each person has so much to offer from his own special individual view and way of life. Also our teachings strictly forbid killing. She told me the reason for the persecution was that a few Falun Gong members were getting political. I told her that's impossible! Falun Dafa cannot be involved in politics because we are focused on higher thoughts and no one can use Falun Dafa for his own purposes because it's the law of the universe not simply a man-made thing.
They repeated that I broke the law in China and must be punished. The only law I think I have broken is I treated my captors as my friends. I lived up to our Teacher's words "Other people may treat us badly, but we do not treat others badly, nor do we treat people as enemies." ("A Brief Statement of Mine")
One of the last questions was "Why did you come here?" After 3 -- 4 hours of questioning I answered this by tapping my heart with the fingers of both hands and opening my palms to them. They said "Oh, Falun Dafa" I said, "Yes. Falun Dafa hao."
Do Not Cooperate with Evil's Arrangement and Keep Clarifying the Truth
The lady questioner suddenly said she was wrong, that I really am a dragon. I smiled sadly at her and thought she will find out she is really wrong about a lot of things. A man came in and made motions as if he were going to lift me up by the hair. The lady interrogator stopped him and they talked. He leaned back and made a thumb up sign to me. I simply kept looking at them and sending forth righteous thoughts.
I refused their invitation for dinner and said I would take no food or drink while I was under their guard in sympathy for my fellow practitioners whom they were torturing to death.
They indicated to me that the whole session had been put on camera. I told them they tricked me and I refused to cooperate any more. I figured for my punishment they would manipulate that tape to hurt me and Dafa. I felt really bad as if I'd let Master and all my fellow practitioners down but I still maintained the dignity of the Fa and kept eliminating all my bad thoughts and notions.
They took me to a police hotel room with 2 guards who changed shifts 3 times. I read the whole book that night and did sitting meditation. I saw the police were impressed by the double crossed legs. The translator came in with a photographer. I got off the bed and sat on the floor. I said, "No more photos, you tricked me before. You have enough pictures." He sat on the other bed and bowed his head, "I'm so sorry, but it's my job."
I didn't realize how severe the persecution really was until I noticed that all the TV programs the police officers watched all night were filled with persecution of Falun Gong. Almost each story had mistreatrment or misrepresentation of Falun Gong practitioners. Almost every story was about making fun of them or demonizing them or showing them arrested and on trial. This went on all night. I slept only two hours. I realized they could turn and attack me at any time and no one would care, but I maintained the dignity of a Dafa disciple and did what a cultivator should do.
The next morning I told them that the TV show is very very bad. They turned it off. We then left. I thought today they would take me to jail. First we went to a room beside the questioning room. This room had black leather sofas. A photographer came in. I held my book in front of my face and said no more pictures. They took me to a car and 2 young policewomen sat on either side of me as we drove along. When the car was parked the men left to go into another building. The girls asked, "Are there really many Falun Gong practitioners outside of China?" I said, "My dear there are thousands of us. We love Falun Dafa in the West. We have parades and conferences all over the world where we make speeches about all the benefits we receive." They asked if people are really getting benefits from Falun Gong. I told them Falun Dafa has been practiced in the West for 7 years and there has been nothing bad happening to the practitioners. We all enjoy the practice. I told them they should see how magnificent it is to see our parades with colourful banners flying in the air and floating on huge balloons. I said, "I could see it all now. Tiananmen Square filled with practitioners from all over the world, everyone doing the exercises together. It will be glorious!" They asked if I knew any Chinese words. I told them I knew some, such as Nihao (hello), Xiexie (thank you), Zaijian (good bye), Zhen-Shan-Ren (Truthfulness-Benevolence-Forbearance) and Falun Dafa hao (Falun Dafa is good). I told them about the formula before each set of Dafa exercise. They repeated the formula words as I said them.
"Remember, Falun Dafa is Good!"
When the men came back we drove to the airport. That was the first time I knew I was almost safe. Before I climbed the stairs, one of the young policewomen said, "You can't come back to China within 5 years." I said I hear your words but we'll see when I come back again. As I stepped onto the plane I turned and waved to all the plainclothes and uniformed police officers and I said, "Remember, Falun Dafa Hao."
I hope what I did shows how important and precious Zhen-Shan-Ren is.
I hope what I did inspires our fellow practitioners to do better in solidly cultivating Dafa and firmly safeguarding Dafa.
I hope what I did it demonstrates how much we care [about the fellow practitioners in China and the precious Chinese people].
Because of Master's boundless benevolence I was kept safe and I'm glad to be home.
My deepest appreciation goes to everyone who helped me along the way. Thank you all! Falun Dafa Hao. Xiexie! Zaijian!