(Minghui.org) If we pay attention to studying the Fa and study it with a calm mind, some seemingly troublesome things will be resolved. It is Master Li (Falun Dafa’s founder), in fact, who resolves them for practitioners. I understand the importance of studying the Fa. If I tell myself to recite the Fa with a calm mind when I slack off, my incorrect state will gradually disappear. At the same time, it will be easy to identify and correct the thoughts that are not consistent with the Fa, so I can improve.
Once, after a group Fa-study, a fellow practitioner publicly criticized me, and I held myself back on the surface. But when other practitioners said he was wrong, a hint of joy swept through my mind, “You’re still wrong, aren’t you!”
I was shocked: What kind of thought is this? Why was I gloating, as if the other practitioners had validated my grudge? It turned out that I hadn’t really practiced forbearance. I only stayed calm on the surface, letting others see that I fulfilled the standards required by Dafa. But, in essence, I didn’t let go of the struggle inside and went against the Fa in my mind. Isn’t that cunning? It also gave rise to jealousy.
When I recite the Fa, I tell myself to calm down and try to make every word appear in front of my eyes. And when I read the Fa out loud, I read at a slower speed and feel as if I’m memorizing the Fa silently. Some practitioners have said that it’s very comfortable listening to me read the Fa because they had trouble concentrating. Although I knew it was the power of Dafa that made them comfortable, I couldn’t help but feel elated. So every time it was my turn to read, I always paid special attention to reading well and thought this would help fellow practitioners get the Fa into their hearts.
During group Fa-study recently, the thought of reading well to make fellow practitioners feel comfortable came up again, but I immediately became vigilant. How can I think this way? As if practitioners feeling comfortable was contingent on my reading well. Am I not putting myself higher than Dafa? It is the power of Dafa itself that makes fellow practitioners concentrate and feel comfortable! I couldn’t help being startled by that thought and saw my arrogant thinking.
I warned myself that I must get rid of this dirty heart of arrogance and that I must correct the relationship between myself and Dafa. I’m only a small particle of Dafa. My “self” is nothing compared to Dafa’s profundity, so I must be rational and sober in my cultivation.
However, when I’m not diligent in cultivation, or if an improper thought flashes by inadvertently, it’s difficult to detect, let alone deny and remove it in time. I may even be taken advantage of by the old forces.
I recall a situation three years ago when I took a high-speed train to another province. Two policemen questioned me, checked my ID card, and searched my backpack. I had traveled by high-speed rail to other places many times without encountering such interference. So why did it happen this time? I carefully reviewed my thoughts along the way and immediately understood why I attracted the interference. It turned out that after I entered the train station and was checked by security, I sat in the waiting room and thought about how I’d taken the train many times, and not once did the police inspect my documents or rummage through my bags.
I then recalled reports on the Minghui website that some practitioners were harassed or even arrested at the high-speed rail stations. I thought: I never encountered such a situation and neither will it be the case today! At that time, I was not aware of my unrighteous thoughts.
It was only after being harassed that I realized the thought I had was not correct. I acknowledged and basically asked for the interference. Since then, I paid more attention to eliminating these improper thoughts. I also realized that I should send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate those evil factors before traveling. However, when I’m not in a good state, I forget to send forth righteous thoughts. And when I have attachments, the old forces will take advantage of the loopholes to persecute me.
This past year, my husband and I went to visit our son in another city. I paid attention to sending righteous thoughts in advance, and the trip went smoothly. But after staying at my son’s place for a while, I was attached to family affection and having fun. I then slacked off on Fa study and sending righteous thoughts. So when we took the train to another city, I had to swipe my ID card several times to pass through the entrance, and my son said something rude to me.
I got upset, feeling how a son could say such a thing to his mother. I could hardly hold back my tears, feeling wronged and resentful. I also completely forgot about sending forth righteous thoughts to eliminate the evil elements that interfere with Dafa practitioners’ traveling. As a result, I was harassed on the platform by a police officer who illegally checked my documents, questioned me, and searched my bag. I knew that my attachment was again being exploited by the old forces.
What was the reason for my being harassed? It must be that I developed a grievance toward my son, and was sad that my prestige and dignity as a mother was hurt. These human thoughts, coupled with the fact that I had forgotten to send forth righteous thoughts were exploited by the evil. I also felt sorry for my family, because the police harassment caused my husband and son to have fear, especially my son who was seeing persecution against me for the first time. They both cooperated to a certain extent with the policeman’s unlawful acts.
When I returned to my son’s place, I strengthened my Fa study and sending forth righteous thoughts for several days. I thought, as a Dafa practitioner, I should be responsible for all sentient beings and save them. I can’t be persecuted because my frame of mind was insufficient to avoid being seized by the old forces. This affected my family members' and other sentient beings’ perceptions of Dafa.
In thinking about this, a sense of sacred responsibility arose in my heart. I sent forth powerful righteous thoughts to eliminate all the persecution of Dafa practitioners. I would never again allow interference on my way back to my hometown, nor allow evil to interfere with the travel of any Dafa practitioners. I needed to let my family members see that the righteous thoughts of Dafa practitioners can dissolve all evil. As I kept sending righteous thoughts, our trip home went smoothly.
As a Dafa practitioner, I should maintain a righteous cultivation state, study the Fa well, persevere in doing the three things, compare myself with Dafa’s standards, and improve from my lessons in a positive way.