(Minghui.org) A practitioner in my area has been blind for five years. Before he went blind, he once told me that he was losing his vision. I didn’t know his thoughts back then, and I didn’t pay much attention. Later, his situation worsened as he developed severe headaches, and eventually he went blind.
Many practitioners helped him send forth righteous thoughts and read the Fa with him. Some asked him to look inward. He responded, “I don’t have an attachment to fame—a person who is suffering doesn’t enjoy fame. I am not attached to money either. As to qing, my ex-wife took our kids away when we divorced, so I have no qing to attach to anybody.”
I didn’t feel comfortable when I heard his reply. I said, “If you don’t have attachments to fame, money, or qing, you would have already reached consummation.”
He didn’t get better. His understanding was that looking inward meant acknowledging the old forces’ persecution. This is a wrong understanding of Master’s teaching. He only focused on sending forth righteous thoughts and eliminating the evil. He also asked local practitioners to send righteous thoughts for him.
He didn’t start to look inward until the situation had worsened. He found two problems.
First, he once took a ride with a business partner who accidentally hit a motorcyclist. His partner asked him to get out of the car and check on the victim. He did and saw that that person appeared to be dead. His partner drove away immediately without him. He then left, too. After all, he didn’t know if the motorcyclist was still alive or dead.
Second, after he divorced he lived with a woman without marrying her because he had almost quit cultivation back then.
He thought that he'd found the reasons for his loopholes, but his health didn’t improve. In my opinion, he didn’t really see his problems—what he found were not attachments but two big obvious mistakes that no cultivator should make.
He sent forth righteous thoughts and tried to look inward, but saw no positive results. He then thought that he had interference when sending righteous thoughts, and other practitioners didn’t put their hearts in it when sending righteous thoughts for him. His understanding stayed at that level for a long time.
Recently, I talked to him again. He said: “A fellow practitioner asked me to look inward. She was right. But, she should emphasize more on how wrong the old forces’ persecution is.”
I then told him my thoughts. He said, “I have listened to recordings of many cultivation experience sharing articles, and nobody has your thoughts. Do something real for me.” All he wanted me to do was to send forth righteous thoughts for him.
Considering this situation, I would like to share some of my recent understandings, which might be helpful for those who have been stuck in sickness karma for a long time.
This practitioner is sincere in cultivation. He almost finished memorizing Zhuan Falun, and is working on the ninth lecture. The reasons for his blindness are very complex, and we don’t know exactly why. But, I think that the old forces are taking advantage of his loopholes. I hope he will study again, carefully, Master’s article “Expounding on the Fa” in Essentials for Further Advancement.
First, I'd like to share my understanding of the “magical tool in cultivation.” In the past, when a master of a small cultivation school left his disciple, he often gave the disciple a magical tool—it could be an instrument. He would tell the disciple to use it when encountering tribulations.
We are cultivating the righteous Fa, but the old forces interfere with us. Master does not acknowledge their arrangements, and neither should we. Master has also given us a magical tool. That is looking within.
My current understanding is that many practitioners who have been suffering from sickness for a long time have a common thought: when they feel uncomfortable, their first thought is that it was caused by the persecution. They prioritize eliminating the evil over looking within. Some even think that looking within means acknowledging the persecution.
In my opinion, when experiencing sickness karma, the first thought of it as the persecution is equivalent to the first thought of it as sickness—neither is a right mindset.
Master said:
“Those ordeals and the suffering, no matter how great or harsh you find them to be, are good things, because they take place solely on account of your cultivation.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2008 New York Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, VIII)
If you believe it is persecution, then persecution will come to you.
Master said:
“This is caused by your pursuit, and others cannot intervene. It is an issue of your enlightenment quality.” (Lecture One, Zhuan Falun, 2000 translation).
So, is persecution a good thing? If it were, why does Master not acknowledge it? My understanding is that the persecution does exist, but Master taught us to beat the old forces at their own game. Master has already changed the arrangement by the evil and turned it into a good thing. So, we should treat the tribulation as a chance for improvement.
Master told us that all we see through the eyes are illusions.
Master also said:
“Because the transformation of gong is very complex, what one feels accounts for nothing. One cannot practice cultivation based on how one feels.” (Lecture Four, Zhuan Falun, 2000 translation)
What our bodies feel are illusions, including the sickness illusion. What is real is the gong that Master transforms for us. I believe that one should not be moved by the illusion, no matter how much suffering he or she has. Instead, one should look within, find the attachments that cause the sickness, and get rid of them.
Master said: “In order to eliminate this negative thing, you must first change your mind.” (Lecture Four, Zhuan Falun) Once you get rid of them, you will pass the test.
If you believe that it is persecution, why don’t you use the magical tool to eliminate it, instead of asking fellow practitioners to send forth righteous thoughts for you? Of course, there is nothing wrong with sending forth righteous thoughts, but the key for passing the test depends on your own cultivation.
Master said: “Cultivation depends on one’s own efforts while the transformation of gong is done by the master.” (Lecture Four, Zhuan Falun)
If you wait too long to look within, and only do so because you have suffered for a long time, then your looking within is conditional, and you do it only for fighting against the tribulation. You have actually accepted the old forces’ arrangements.
Some practitioners may think: I can validate the Fa better and save more people, if my sickness karma is gone. I believe that this claim is a stretch. It is selfish. You have actually fallen into the old forces’ trap, and you have given the old forces an excuse for persecuting you.
Master will not intervene in those cases for the reasons he has explained to us. If a practitioner has been stuck in sickness karma for a long time, he or she may treat it as disease, and will eventually give up on passing the test and go to the hospital.
If your first thought treats it as a good thing (because Master has changed the old forces’ arrangements for you), look inward and get rid of the selfishness, you will be proactively assimilating in the Fa. Once your xinxing level is improved, Master will give you a hint telling you what to do. As long as you improve yourself, the illusion will disappear.
Here is an analogy: a rotten apple would attract flies. You kill some, and more will come. You cannot kill them all. The best solution is to throw away the rotten apple—find out the attachments and get rid off them.
Moreover, no matter how horrifying the illusion and the suffering are, one must distinguish his true-self and human notions. His main consciousness must keep repelling human notions, attachments, and the thoughts imposed on him by the old forces.
A few fellow practitioners in my area have similar experiences—the false ego, consisting of one’s karma, attachments and notions, refuses to die. If you can distinguish them and try to get rid of them, Master will help you. The faster you find out and eliminate your attachments, the faster the tribulation will disappear.
Resentment: The Root of the Tribulation
One day, I suffered from a toothache. It was so painful that I could not even focus when sending forth righteous thoughts. I didn’t think it was persecution, but kept looking within. It was not due to lack of cultivating speech, nor was it due to the attachments to food. All of sudden, I realized that it was caused by my resentment of a fellow practitioner. I apologized to Master right away, and the toothache was relieved. It was completely gone the next morning.
Another time, I held resentment toward a practitioner, because she was so slow when participating in a project. She was also always late for our meetings, making everybody wait for her. I was angry. One day I had severe pain in my legs. I could not even move. I realized that it was caused by the resentment. I apologized to Master. Soon, the pain disappeared, and I was able to move again.
Lustful Desire Is a Trap
One night, fellow practitioners and I hung posters in a public place. I tried to put a poster at a high wall. The board I stepped on broke suddenly, and I fell into a six-foot deep pit. I then saw that the board was made of asbestos tile for waterproofing, not for supporting weight. Another practitioner and I stood on it before I fell, and nothing happened. But it broke when I was the only one on it.
This kind of tile is very rarely used these days. It must have been a trap set up by the old forces. Master “beat them in their own game,” and dissolved the tribulation for me. It was changed to be a good thing. I was not injured, and didn’t think of the old forces. We finished hanging the posters.
After getting home, I started to look inward. I realized that Master used this incident to remind me to get rid of lustful desire, which I had experienced again after a long time.
Denying the Illusion at the Surface Level
My wife, also a practitioner, goes out to clarify the truth every day. A while ago, she developed warts every time she returned home, which were very itchy. She once asked me to have a look. I had a look and took them lightly. I only said to her: “There is nothing serious.” Whenever she brought that up, I always replied: “There is nothing to worry about.” One day she asked me to scratch her skin. I firmly said no. The warts disappeared after.
It is truly like what Master said:
“good or evil comes from a person’s spontaneous thought, and the thought at that moment can bring about different consequences.” (Lecture Four, Zhuan Falun).
Through this incident, I realized that we must treat other practitioners’ tribulations with righteous thoughts.
Editor’s note: This article only represents the author’s current understanding meant for sharing among practitioners so that we can “Compare with one another in study, in cultivation.” (“Solid Cultivation,” Hong Yin)