(Minghui.org) Looking back on my years of cultivation, there were hardships and tribulations, but there were more triumphs. I would like to share some of my experiences and understandings.
I began practicing Falun Dafa in 2012.
During my cultivation, physical discomfort was common, and at times it made me uneasy. Thoughts of unhappiness, resistance, and self-pity emerged, which led me to slack off in cultivation. The following thoughts surfaced: “I have already been trying so hard” and “How come I still have so much to improve?” Such negative thinking made the situation I was in even worse.
Take doing the exercises as an example. I was often afraid of the Falun Standing Stance, the second exercise. It tired me out. Nevertheless, I pushed on until the end every time.
After looking within, I found the fear of hardship and the fear that I wouldn't be able to finish the exercises. I got better as these thoughts were eliminated. I felt tired again one day while I was doing the Falun Standing Stance. At that instant, Master Li’s (the founder of Falun Dafa) words came to me:
“Human beings believe that a life of comfort is a good thing, while Dafa disciples believe that having everything be easy is a bad thing when it comes to their improvement and that discomfort is conducive to improvement. (Applause) Have you managed to turn around your fundamental concepts?” (Teachings at the 2005 Conference in San Francisco)
That’s right! Why did I consider discomfort a bad thing? That’s the thinking of an ordinary person. I repeated to myself: “I am a practitioner, discomfort is good.” Then I felt much better, not as tired as before. The music did not seem too long anymore.
That was the first time I finished the second exercise with ease. The sitting meditation became easier as well. The last 10 minutes, which had been the most painful part, went like a breeze.
Since then, I consciously strengthen the thought: “Discomfort is good,” so I can correct myself as soon as problems arise.
Soon after, similar tests came at home and work.
One morning, while I was rushing to get ready for work, I hit my hand on a drawer that my daughter had left open. I got upset but quickly caught myself: “No, discomfort is a good thing. My daughter is helping me cultivate my xinxing. How can I blame her for that? I should thank her!” The pain in my hand stopped, and I was calm again.
Out of the blue, colleagues at work began to ignore me. Not only that, they talked about me behind my back. It was difficult for me to accept such treatment as I am friendly to all of my coworkers. I picked up their slack and did more than my share of work. Though I am considerate and humbly listen to criticism, their sudden coldness saddened me and kept me up at night.
That was not the first time I felt that way. Similar things happened to me many times in the past. I realized it was time to eliminate this attachment.
Clearly, it was a test. My colleagues were helping me, but I did not want to accept their help. Why? Because I was so nice to them, yet that was how they treated me? I realized that they can do what they want, and I can only endure it because I am a Falun Dafa practitioner. It was a stuffy feeling! My mood was especially bad in the morning, such that I did not want to do anything. I could not study the Fa or do the exercises. My heart felt like it was about to explode.
I calmed down and thought: “Aren’t these good things! Without conflict, how does one cultivate? Isn’t this discomfort? It is discomfort and unpleasantness. Unpleasant for whom? Isn't it selfishness? This ‘selfishness’ must be eliminated.”
Master said:
“I’ll tell you a truth: The entire cultivation process for a cultivator is one of constantly giving up human attachments.” (Lecture One, Zhuan Falun)
As a cultivator, I did not come to the human world to enjoy “comfort” and “pleasant things.” Eliminating attachments is why I am here. It became clear to me that it does not matter how they treat me. The focus should be on my attachments, such as hatred, competitiveness, jealousy, self-pity, fear of being lonely, showing off, and vanity. All these came to the surface.
Why would I feel sad after I found so many attachments to eliminate? Without those attachments, my colleagues’ behavior would not have affected me! I continued to send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate the attachments. My mood lifted. Why should I be unhappy about all this? My colleagues helped me so much. I should thank them instead.
Master said:
“A wicked person is born of jealousy.Out of selfishness and anger he complains about unfairness towards himself.A benevolent person always has a heart of compassion.With no discontentment or hatred, he takes hardship as joy.An enlightened person has no attachments at all.He quietly observes the people of the world deluded by illusions.”
(“Realms,” Essentials For Further Advancement)
As cultivators, we understand that physical and mental discomfort are caused by our karma. When it happens, we should look within ourselves and accept Master’s plan for us with a calm heart.
The feelings of unpleasantness, fatigue, and unbearable pain made me grumble at first. However, looking at it from the viewpoint of the Fa, experiencing hardship will eliminate karma. What a good thing! With this mentality, I find that the pain and fatigue are not as bad as before, and I stopped grumbling. Instead, I have a smile on my face, accepting what I have to endure to eliminate karma.
I wanted those around me to know the greatness of Dafa. Not long after I became a practitioner, my husband and daughter also started to practice.
Over the past nine years, I took every opportunity to clarify the truth to family and friends. At first, they did not understand Falun Dafa or the truth about the persecution of Falun Dafa in China. They despised and cursed me because they were deceived by the Chinese Communist Party's (CCP) slander about Dafa. But I persisted, and they eventually understood, and some even became practitioners.
I firmly believe that the people I meet in this life are here to be saved by the Fa. Most of my family and friends have renounced their memberships in the CCP and its affiliated organizations. Dozens of them, including my mother and sister, listen to Master’s lectures and are learning the exercises.
After practicing Falun Dafa for six months, my 83-year-old mother’s rheumatoid arthritis and diabetes went away. My elder brother had three tumors. Soon after he began studying the Fa, two of the tumors went away and the third one shrank. My cousin recovered from leukemia. After 60 years of smoking, my aunt was able to quit. Additionally, all her aches and pains went away.
Under Master’s compassion and protection, even though there have been hardships, what I’ve gained through nine years of cultivation is priceless. On behalf of my friends and family, I thank Master for his salvation. With selfishness set aside, I will do the three things better, live up to Master’s expectations, and fulfill my vow.