(Minghui.org) While reflecting on my cultivation journey over the past 22 years, I realized that I had not seriously adhered to Dafa’s requirements for practitioners. This issue was exposed by the fact that I was not paying attention to my cultivation. My words and actions were often not in accordance with the Fa.
While I memorized Zhuan Falun today, I went over the section, “Guarding Your Speech.” I had easily memorized this section before, but now I had difficulty. I realized that this was a hint, telling me that I needed to look inward and examine my cultivation—I found that I was not minding my speech. Although I read Master's teachings numerous times I did not apply them in my day-to-day interactions.
I'm a teacher, so I speak very well, and this ability usually gives me an edge. However, having a skillful command of language and the ability to communicate fluently caused troubles in my cultivation, and I sometimes unintentionally hurt fellow practitioners.
Because I can speak well, I frequently like to comment on other practitioners’ issues. This behavior is similar to ordinary people’s bad habit of gossiping. Although I appeared to be discussing cultivation, I was not truly trying to help fellow practitioners. Instead, I was expressing my own opinion with an attachment of showing off. I felt that I could see others’ problems clearly—so I was better than them. Little did I realize that I was demonstrating the bad “CCP culture” hidden inside me.
Only Master can clearly see each practitioner’s true situation. When we notice other practitioners’ attachments, this is Master allowing us to see them so we can help each other improve. When I gossiped about practitioners’ shortcomings behind their backs, my own attachments surfaced. I did not mind my speech and I incurred karma. Instead of immediately commenting I should have first looked inward and corrected myself. Since I did not identify my own attachments I missed many opportunities for improvement.
For instance, I went to a fellow practitioner’s house yesterday to pick up truth-clarification materials. I casually said a few words when I noticed that her facial expression suddenly became weird, as if I said something offensive. But what I said had nothing to do with her. Looking back I realized that I showed strong ego. I stated things in a definite tone to express my opinions, indicating that I was absolutely right. As a result she felt disgusted. Similar situations happened before, but I did not correct myself.
I finally realized my problem. Guarding one’s speech is very important. I will follow the Fa’s standards from now on, consider others’ feelings, and guard my speech to truly assimilate to the Fa. When sharing experiences with fellow practitioners, I should discuss issues from the perspective of a cultivator. I will look only at other practitioners’ strengths and treat their problems as a reflection of where I need to improve.
This sharing is based on my personal understanding. If I've said anything that deviates from the Fa, please compassionately point it out to me. Thank you!