(Minghui.org) Greetings, Master! Greetings, fellow practitioners!
I started practicing Falun Dafa in March 2019. I am 60 years old and I first heard of Dafa in March 2009. I married my second husband that year—he was a gifted program Chinese teacher in a key middle school in the provincial capital. He was proficient in poems, songs, piano, chess, calligraphy and painting. I admired my husband’s talents and character. He treated my daughter from my first marriage as his own. We had a good relationship.
My husband and his first wife practiced Falun Dafa before the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) initiated the persecution in July 1999. They gave up due to fear of the persecution. His wife passed away a few years later. He told me about Dafa in March 2009. We occasionally read Dafa books and practiced the exercises. But we never genuinely started cultivating.
My husband became very ill and suddenly passed away in December 2018. I was caught off guard. I felt desperate. I wept and begged my husband to, “Take me with you!”
I felt lonely. Some of my old illnesses relapsed such as chronic gastric disease, stiff spine, leg pain, arrhythmia, pituitary hemangioma, stroke complications, etc. My health rapidly deteriorated.
It was close to the 2019 Chinese New Year. There's an old folk saying: “A new widow cannot spend the New Year in other people’s homes because she will bring them bad luck.” So I couldn’t visit my sisters and brothers. I felt desperate and lonely.
My daughter invited me to her home. But seeing other people (my daughter lives with her mother-in-law) happily celebrating the New Year, I felt superfluous. What people saw were my grievances, tears, and bitterness. Of course they felt uncomfortable around me.
Only my grandson could bring me a little joy and comfort as I brought him up. But he was not allowed to approach me. I was immersed in loneliness and felt deeply depressed.
I left and visited a close friend. My friend's grandson was born that day, and I gave her five thousand yuan as a gift. But after four or five days of my crying all day with a bitter face, and long sighs, she gently asked me to leave. I really experienced what despair was.
I checked into a hotel. I thought, “It seems that I cannot count on anyone when I am desperate. I have to fulfill my husband’s last wish and sort out the manuscripts he prepared to publish. My daughter is just over 30, and I am her only immediate relative. I have to accompany her through her life. My stepson has a family of three. My granddaughter was brought up by my husband and I. The family will come back from the south. It will be hard. There are still many things I need to take care of.”
I felt more depressed than ever. At that moment, I remembered Falun Dafa and Master Li. Although I did not start cultivating years ago, I had Dafa in my heart. I thought only Dafa and Master could rescue me out of this desperate situation. I decided to practice Falun Dafa.
I wished to practice Falun Dafa, but I did not know any practitioners in my city. I recalled that my sister (in another city) said her friend was a practitioner. I decided to visit her. The practitioner brought me to the local group Fa-study. As soon as I saw their sincere and enthusiastic faces, I felt welcome and happy. It was March 2019.
From March 2009 to March 2019, for ten years, I was like a lost lamb, wandering, lost, and searching. I finally found my way home. I truly appreciate Master for his salvation.
I stayed over 80 days at my sister’s home. I rode a bus for two hours every day to go to the Fa-study group. The practitioners did not let me do anything but study the Fa. They gave me all of Master’s lectures and audio recordings as well as informational materials. I read three lectures of Zhuan Falun, the main book of Falun Dafa, every day. I also read Master’s other teachings.
Along with studying the Fa, I knew the three things that a Dafa practitioner should do during the Fa-rectification period, especially raising awareness to save sentient beings. Master is anxious to save sentient beings. I thought that as his disciple I should do what Master wants us to do, and we should do it wholeheartedly.
Before long, I started to clarify the truth. I talked to friends and relatives and then to passengers on the bus or whoever I met. I didn’t think much and had no negative thoughts. I just listened to Master’s teaching to save sentient beings.
I advised over 50 people to quit their memberships in the CCP organizations in a little over 80 days. Before I knew it, all the uncomfortable feelings in my body disappeared. I felt refreshed and energized.
When my daughter came to visit me she was delighted to see me in such high spirits. But, when she saw the Dafa books in my room, she tried to stop me from practicing.
I said, “You've seen the positive changes in me in just six weeks. I feel healthy. You should appreciate Dafa and Master. Why are you telling me to stop practicing?!”
My daughter wept. She returned home and told my two brothers. This caused a stir. They were misled by the CCP’s propaganda and lies against Falun Dafa. My sister told them about the persecution in the city. My younger brother came to see me and said some negative things. My other brother phoned me to persuade me to give up.
I said, “If you are afraid of being persecuted because I practice Falun Dafa, let's go to a notary and dissolve our relationship.” I thought they were misled by the CCP. I must listen to Master and cultivate well so they could see the grace of Dafa and be saved.
This year, I clarified the truth to my relatives whenever there was an opportunity. They are gradually beginning to understand.
Living in my sister’s home was not a long-term solution. I decided to go back to my home in the provincial capital. In July 2019, I contacted practitioners there. As soon as I returned, I immediately told my stepson and daughter that I was home and I invited them over. When they came, I gave them their real estate certificates. I didn’t want anything because the pension was enough for me.
I donated 20,000 yuan to a truth-clarification project. I also gave money to a few practitioners who prepare truth-clarification materials.
Now two fellow practitioners and I rent an apartment together. One practitioner is experiencing illness karma and needs help. The other practitioner takes care of almost all the household chores so I can study the Fa and catch up with the Fa-rectification. I appreciate her selfless help.
The three of us live a simple life and do the three things. We get up at three o’clock in the morning every day and practice the exercises. After we send forth righteous thoughts at 6 a.m., we eat some noodles and study the Fa. We go out to do face to face truth-clarification after sending righteous thoughts at 9 a.m. We return home before 11:30 a.m.
The practitioner who stays home cooks rice. We finish lunch in 20 minutes and send righteous thoughts at 12 p.m. We start reciting the Fa at 1 p.m. and have group Fa-study after sending righteous thoughts at 2 p.m. We do house chores at 4:30 p.m. and have dinner at 5:30 p.m. We return to our own rooms to study the Fa or read sharing articles on Minghui after sending righteous thoughts at 6 p.m. This is our daily schedule.
Our rented house is in the suburbs of the provincial capital. Some villagers in the area do sanitation work. Once, I told a sanitation worker the truth about Dafa. He proudly said, “The six sanitation workers in our village have all quit the CCP organizations. We read together.”
When I asked, “What are you reading?” He said, “We read the small booklets you gave us.” I was moved and asked with a smile, “Do you want to practice Dafa?” He said, “Yes!” I said, “If you want to practice, you should read Zhuan Falun. That is a heavenly book.” The sanitation worker smiled.
I gave them two copies of Zhuan Falun, one copy of Falun Gong, and several books of Master Li’s other teachings. I also gave each of them a music player containing audio of Master’s teaching and the exercise music. Now they've begun to practice Falun Dafa.
Once, I clarified the truth to a well-dressed man in his 50s. He had a good understanding of the CCP and said he admired Dafa practitioners. He withdrew from the CCP organizations. When he said farewell he said sincerely, “I know you practitioners are very brave, but you must pay attention to safety!” I thanked him and was very moved.
I rode my bike looking for someone I could clarify the truth to. I saw a man pushing his electric bike not far away. When I asked what happened he said the battery ran down. We chatted and he said he read some books on Buddhism.
I told him some of the principles of Dafa and he agreed. I gave him the booklets, Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party and The Ultimate Goal of Communism. He insisted on giving me 20 yuan, but I declined.
At that moment, two people came over. I quickly turned around to clarify the truth to them. After clarifying the truth, I looked back and found that there was 20 yuan in the basket, and the man had left. I gave the money to the practitioner who prepares materials.
Another day while I rode my bike looking for someone to clarify the truth to, I suddenly heard a popping sound, as if a tire burst. I noticed a young man get off his bicycle and look at the tire. I hurried over and asked if he needed help.
I clarified the truth and advised him to quit the CCP organizations. As soon as he finished agreeing to withdraw, he got on the bike and left. There was nothing wrong with the tire! I realized Master arranged for us to meet.
I saw a woman in her 70s sitting by the roadside one day. When I greeted her, she pointed to her ear, indicating that she was deaf. I wrote a question on a piece of paper, “Have you joined the CCP Young Pioneers?” She nodded.
I wrote, “Many people are quitting the CCP for a safe future.” She looked puzzled so I wrote, “The CCP’s many political movements killed over 80 million Chinese people. Heaven will disintegrate it. If you don't quit it you may be implicated for its crimes.” She happily nodded in agreement and pressed both of her hands in front of her chest to thank me.
I saw a nicely dressed woman in her 50s who looked distressed. I greeted her, then asked, “Do you need any help?” She was from the city and had just retired. Her husband recently died. She said she was sick and lonely. She stayed in her daughter’s home nearby, but she and her daughter did not communicate well and often had conflicts.
I chatted with her and told her how practicing Falun Dafa brought me so many positive changes. She said she practiced Falun Dafa before July 1999 but gave up for fear of the persecution.
I felt close to her as she was a former practitioner and we both lost our husbands. I remembered that Master asked us to find practitioners and encourage them to resume practicing Dafa. I said, “It seems that Master arranged for us to meet. He does not want to leave any disciples behind.”
I talked with her about the Fa-rectification and the three things that Dafa practitioners were doing. She was excited and said she would resume practicing. I invited her to our Fa-study group. She said she had Dafa books and knew where a Fa-study group was. I encouraged her to join them.
One day I met a man in his 40s at a bus stop. I clarified the truth to him. He smiled and said, “You practitioners in the city are doing well. We are far behind.” It turned out that he and another practitioner came to the city to avoid the CCP’s persecution. They sold food on the roadside to make a living. They were busy making money but did not diligently study the Fa, practice the exercises or send righteous thoughts.
One of the practitioners had a computer but could not access Minghui.org. They could not read Master’s new lectures, or Minghui Weekly. We exchanged phone numbers and I asked an IT practitioner to update their computer.
I've met more than twelve former practitioners since last October. I tried my best to help and encourage them to resume cultivation and catch up with the Fa-rectification.
I regret that I wasted ten years. But I also feel fortunate to practice Dafa during this final leg of the Fa-rectification. I know I have many attachments. I must listen to Master’s teaching and be diligent in studying the Fa, looking within to eliminate human attachments unconditionally and saving sentient beings with righteous thoughts. I just need to move forward and not worry about the future.
Thank you, Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners, for your help!
(The 17th China Falun Dafa Experience Sharing Conference on Minghui.org)