(Clearwisdom.net) One year ago, my husband and child started practicing Falun Gong through my influence. However, they have not cultivated diligently. They only know that Dafa is good and superficially understand Dafa. Occasionally they do the exercises and study the Fa. At that time, I always encourage them to practice more diligently but with little result. Because I was busy with validating the Fa and sometimes did not take care of the family, my husband was frequently unhappy and even wanted to divorce me. Once I was urging my husband to do the exercises and study the Fa, and he shouted, "The biggest barrier to practicing Falun Gong for me is you!" I was very surprised to hear that. I knew this was Teacher enlightening me. If this was my problem, where did I go wrong?
I searched inward and found that I always fussed at them for their bad perceptions and their fear of enduring difficulties. Sometimes I even thought, "I overcame so many hardships to reach my current level, but they started practicing so late, and they have poor enlightenment quality--how can they ever reach a high level?" When they were not in a very good state, just like everyday people, I thought they were hopeless. Actually, I was imposing my human notions on my husband and child, and, just like building a wall in front of them, I was preventing them from making a breakthrough.
Sometimes when I was doing a project to validate the Fa, I treated it as my personal project. I asked them to give me time and make things more convenient for me. I completely disregarded them. Once I was very late coming home and my husband was angry. He said, "You should go live by yourself!" I felt upset when I heard this. I complained silently about him, wondering why he was like that again.
That night I had a dream. In my dream, I took my child and went to a Falun Gong rally to display banners. I walked very fast and left my child behind. Soon I could not see my child anymore. When I arrived at the rally site, I did not see one person there. I had to return to my starting point and found that everyone was still there, including my child and my husband. After waking up, I realized that I only cared about my cultivation, and not others. It is possible that my mission, which I have agreed to in my previous life, is to be completed with my husband and my child. I obtained the Fa first and then led them to obtain the Fa. Then we will cultivate together until reaching a high level. However, I only thought about myself and did not care about them. Sometimes I even regarded myself as a veteran practitioner and felt superior, thus hindering them from improving their level. I have clearly broken my promise in my previous life. How can they be happy? Then I started to understand the reasons for my husband's heated temper. I knew that it was not his human side that was upset--his knowing side was really upset.
The next day I told my husband about my dream. I also shared with him my understanding of this dream. I told him, "From now on we will do Fa study and exercises together, we will do the projects to validate the Fa together, and I will not give up on you." My husband responded, "You cannot do that!" I smiled-- I knew I had found my attachment. I told him, "I most certainly can!" That same day my husband, my child, and I studied the Fa together and had a sharing. Since then, almost every day, we study the Fa study together for half an hour or one hour, plus I study the Fa by myself. Every day, I asked them to memorize one of Teacher's poems from Hong Yin. I also helped them to improve their xinxing level when they met with tribulations. Currently, I no longer have domestic disputes. If I am busy and have a late night, they do not complain about it anymore. If I need to go out to do things, they will also support me. My husband also started to help his colleagues to withdraw from the CCP.
Through my experience I have understood one principle: our family members came to establish a predestined relationship with us. They came to this world for the Fa. No matter how much you care for them, it would be a deficiency on our part if we don't help them to obtain the Fa, because this is their true purpose. Some practitioners think that their family members are too stubborn. In fact, I think this is only the reason on the surface, an illusion. The real reason is, if we do not cultivate well ourselves, they will be unable to come into the Fa. Teacher said:
"Every person in the entire world was at one point part of my family." ("Explaining the Fa During the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference")
In the universe all lives are Teacher's creations, therefore they all are Teacher's children. We--practitioners and our family members--are also Teacher's children.
We might be connected by a family relationship, but no doubt they all came for the Fa. Thus, we should judge everyone based on saving sentient beings and not with our human notions, when we think of our family members. Every day we should cultivate ourselves well at every moment and let them see the beauty of Falun Dafa. Thus, they certainly will change. We must have confidence in our family members!
What I have shared are my recent experiences. Fellow practitioners, please kindly correct my errors.