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I Am a Particle of Falun Dafa

November 15, 2008 |   By Fang Wai, a practitioner in China

(Clearwisdom.net) I was jailed in 2002. I refused to denounce Falun Gong in jail, so I lost my job, my family and my home. My family thought I was crazy and attempted to put me in a psychiatric hospital. After I escaped from the jail, I was destitute and went to live with a relative. My mother came to take care of me because she believed I would meet a miserable end once the government caught me again and, as she said, she wanted to spend "the rest of my time to live" with me. Seeing my mother struggle, I recited "Turning back, my wish fulfilled, I shall come again to help all return." from "Visiting My Hometown" in Hong Yin, believing that the darkness will be gone eventually.

Afterward, I went far away and found an easy, well paying job. Every time I returned home, I told my family the truth about the persecution of Falun Gong. After listening to me and seeing the truth-clarification VCDs, my family finally understood the true nature of the CCP. They saw that I was becoming younger-looking and prettier, and they gradually changed their attitude towards Dafa. My mother said, "Of course Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good!"

- Excerpts from this practitioner's sharing

Greetings to respected Teacher!

Greetings to fellow practitioners!

The path of my cultivation has not been smooth, and I was always too ashamed to write it down and share it. Something changed me, though. After the Second Mainland China Falun Dafa Practitioners Cultivation Experience Sharing Conference on the Internet was announced in 2005, I still refused to write anything. On the day of the deadline, I had a dream. I was in a classroom and Teacher was picking up practitioners' experience sharing papers. I kept my head down and thought that Teacher wouldn't see me. However, Teacher stopped in front of me to collect mine. I was very embarrassed and promised Teacher immediately that I would write one the next day. Since then, I have submitted an experience sharing every year to the Fahui. If my submission does not get published, I read other practitioners experience sharings and look for my gaps. If my submission is accepted for publication, I carefully look through the changes the editors made to what I wrote and find my attachments. Besides, writing an experience sharing is itself cultivation. The following is what I want to share with my fellow practitioners.

Fa study

Obtaining the Fa is the most precious thing that has ever happened to me. Teacher puts everything we need for the practice in the book Zhuan Falun. The Fa can rectify the cosmos. The Fa requires us to completely assimilate to it in order to achieve consummation. I have always understood this and have known the importance of Fa study. I started memorizing the Fa in 2003. After I finished memorizing the book once, I read through it several times, and then I memorized it again. I have now memorized it 25 times. I also read through all of Teacher's other lectures. When I studied the Fa well, I did the three things with ease and felt happy, as if I was floating on air. My heart was tranquil and calm. When I did not study the Fa well, the results of my doing the three things were not as good. There would be interference and a lot of human notions would get in the way. Especially when I worked at the "truth clarification" material making site, I felt uneasy, as if the evils were staring at me, and with my celestial eye I could see rotten demons peeking in from outside. The security issue bothered me a lot. Teacher said in "Drive Out Interference" in Essentials for Further Advancement II, "The Fa can break all attachments, the Fa can destroy all evil, the Fa can shatter all lies, and the Fa can strengthen righteous thoughts." The more I memorized the Fa, the more I felt the profound principles behind every phrase, every word, and every punctuation mark. If there was a section of the Fa that was hard for me to memorize, it must be because I lacked something in my practice. I would memorize that section until I could say it smoothly. Afterwards, I would fell so free and comfortable.

Changes in my mother

In the eight years since I began practicing, it has been my mother's attitude toward Dafa that has made me believe in the miracles and hardships of cultivation. The year 2000 was the hardest year of my life. Just as I was about to collapse mentally and physically, I learned about Falun Dafa! Words couldn't express my joy when my Buddha nature connected with the Fa. I withdrew from my insurance policy and sold all my stocks. I found my way home and all that I had wanted previously became nothing more than a bubble to me. One time while doing the second exercise, I saw a deity standing in front of me, smiling. But I ignored it. All I had in mind was: "I only follow my Teacher and don't care about anything else." The deity disappeared.

I began practicing when the persecution of Falun Gong was at its worst. The TV and news was filled with nothing but lies and propaganda against Dafa. My family, especially my mother, was against it and worried about me. My mother told me recently that back then she was even afraid that I would kill all of them to bring them to heaven. In 2002, I was imprisoned. I refused to denounce Falun Gong and was about to lose my job, my family, and my house. My family thought I was crazy and attempted to put me in a psychiatric hospital. After I escaped from the prison, I was forced to leave home and went to live with a relative. My mother came to take care of me because she believed I would come to a miserable end once the government caught me again and, as she said, she wanted to spend "the rest of my time to live" with me. Seeing my mother struggle, I recited "Turning back, my wish fulfilled, I shall come again to help all return." from "Visiting my Hometown" in Hong Yin, believing that the darkness will be gone eventually.

During that time, my mother was so mad at me that she once threw a stool at me and put sleeping pills in my drinking water, hoping I would go to sleep and not practice Falun Dafa. But the sleeping pills had no effect. Little did my mother know that her daughter was different from the inside out due to the practice. Being able to escape prison and see the sky again was the manifestation of Dafa's power. My skin was peeling off when I was in prison and it stopped after I got out. I felt the heavenly circuit around my body was moving fiercely and my body was electrified all day long. The first night I was at my relative's place, I saw Teacher in a dream. Teacher sat on a large lotus flower and was performing the Big Hand Signs. Red light covered Teacher. It was such a magnificent vision! I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't stop smiling for the longest time.

Afterward, I went far away and found an easy, well paying job. Every time I returned home, I told my family the truth about the persecution of Falun Gong. After listening to me and watching the truth-clarification VCDs, my family finally understood the true nature of the CCP. They saw that I was becoming younger-looking and prettier and gradually changed their attitude towards Dafa. My mother said, "Of course Truth-Compassion-Tolerance is good!" My mother still did not want me to talk to others about my practice. I told her I knew how to protect myself and how important it was to go out and tell people the truth about Dafa and do good deeds. I also told her about the miracles I had experienced during my cultivation.

My grandmother had a heart condition and a spinal disc protrusion. It didn't seem as if she would live much longer. My family had already begun preparing for her funeral. When I went home to visit, I told my grandmother to recite "Falun Dafa is good" and she did. In a week she could sit up, after being bed-ridden for several months. She was able to breathe easy again and soon enough she could even walk. I saw her again after six months and she had gained a lot of the weight back that she had lost and had a healthy appetite. My three-year-old niece was very sick. She often needed shots or intravenous injections. She also took a lot of medicine every day. I downloaded many children songs and cartoons from the Minghui (Chinese version of Clearwisdom) website for her to listen to and watch. I also gave her a copy of Hong Yin, which she read every night. Soon after, she stopped needing shots and medicine. She was very lively and her health improved dramatically. She became the healthiest among the children in her class.

My mother started to believe in Dafa and began putting fresh flowers in front of Teacher's picture. She asked me to tell her Buddhist stories and said she would practice after Falun Gong is redressed. When I gave Falun Dafa CDs to my relatives, she often chimed in and said, "Watch it! It's interesting!" Once I did the exercises in the morning with an MP3 player hanging in front of my chest. The player suddenly exuded a blinding and dazzling light, which my mother happened to see. The next day I heard her saying to a relative, "My daughter will become a deity." I laughed, but I saw that my mother was once again taking pride in her daughter.

Stories about people quitting the Chinese Communist Party (CCP)

A factory director came to my office on business. I told him to quit the CCP for the safety of his own future. He believed me but was afraid that the head of the CCP office, Hu, would find out. I told him Hu would never find out because I would never tell. He was glad to quit and after that, he often swung by my office whenever he stopped by my work place. In order to make people feel safe after quitting the CCP, I diligently cultivated my speech in my daily life.

I began working at a Dafa materials production site. One day I went to get a haircut at a nearby salon. I told the young lady about the violent and phony nature of the evil CCP while trying to eliminate the bad elements in her mind. However, the shop was very close to the material making site and I was worried about the safety of the site. I did not ask her to quit the CCP. Several days later in my dream, I saw her holding my waist, begging me to have a haircut again and promising me a discount. I woke up feeling sad that I had missed that chance and I knew I had to save her. Before I went, I sent righteous thoughts, "Eliminate the interference from the environment; erase her memory of me after I save her." I helped her quit and told her that if her family wanted to quit, they could write on a piece of money that they quit the CCP and spend it. She agreed. I learned there was a practitioner who had told her to quit the CCP before but she did not at that time. What an opportunity I had seized!

One time while I was living with my mother, two nuns came to ask for donations. I treated them to a meal and in the process urged them to quit the CCP. I also told her that I had lost my house, my job, and family because I practice Falun Gong and had to live with my mother. They quit the CCP and its affiliated organizations. Before I left, I went to my bedroom to get them amulets(1). They followed me to my room and saw Teacher's picture. One of them shouted, "Oh, I came to Buddha's house today!" Before she left, she said, "This house is so clean." I hope this will help with them obtain the Fa in the future.

I am a particle of Dafa

I often said to Teacher, "Teacher, I am a particle of Dafa. Wherever you place me, I will do the things I need to do." I found my permanent place of residence at the end of 2007. I started helping the local practitioners make Dafa materials. Soon after I got here, a practitioner in charge of making Dafa materials was arrested. Most of the practitioners here were unable to help. I remembered that before I came, Teacher told me in my dream to work on a wasteland. I stayed and worked at the site making materials because I knew that was where I was supposed to be.

I had some savings so I did not need to look for a new job. I tried to do my best and split my time between studying the Fa, sending righteous thoughts, and making information materials. I often felt I was in an empty state and there was nothing in my mind. What I did was just follow a moving mechanism and the results were always good. No matter how many materials the coordinator needed, I could always get them out. I thought perhaps I worked in a different dimension and the time from this dimension wasn't restraining me. I treated every piece of equipment at the site like a coworker. I often shared experiences with them and played Dafa music for them. The equipment seldom had problems. I only made materials I believed were based on the Fa. Most of the time I used materials from the Minghui website and avoided others. When practitioners asked me to make materials that I thought were not based on the Fa, I refused and explained to them what I thought.

There was not enough money to make Dafa materials so I used my savings to help. I kept my life simple. Everything a practitioner has, whether it is money or a skill, it is a resource of Dafa, and we need to use it carefully for the Fa.

Practitioners seldom went to remote areas, and some nearby places still had not heard of Dafa. So another practitioner and I went to these places to deliver Dafa materials. We are following Teacher's words of, "not omitting a single area where there are people." ("Let Go of Human Attachments and Save the World's People") Sometimes we only saw several households after walking a long way; sometimes after we climbed over a mountain, we saw nothing but a utility pole. Nevertheless, we still posted flyers with the truth about Falun Dafa on them so people who traveled that way could see them. As of today, we have almost covered the entire area once. Things go well if we keep our righteous thoughts the whole time.

Walking in the remote areas, I did not feel estranged but felt I was home. One time the other practitioner told me that he/she hadn't been to these places for decades. I replied "I haven't been here for centuries." Perhaps I was right. In my dream, I saw that the other practitioner and I had been practitioners in prehistoric times. Back then, I also made Dafa materials. We've all been through so many tough times, waiting for this unprecedented opportunity. I have followed Teacher to this day. I am no longer a childish practitioner. As Fa rectification is nearing the end, I just want to do well in everything so I can deserve to be called a practitioner.

Note:

(1) Amulets - In China, practitioners sometimes clarify the truth by giving people something small to wear or cherish, bearing a few words reminding them of the goodness of Dafa.