(Clearwisdom.net) Last weekend more than sixty Toronto practitioners and I went to New York City to participate in the promotion and ticket sales activities for the Divine Performing Arts shows. During this process I came to a further understanding on the issue of believing in Master and Dafa. I also became acutely aware of my shortcomings in my personal cultivation. It made me realize Master's painstaking effort -- to take advantage of the shows, to save the world's people and give us opportunities again and again, to cultivate ourselves well. The following are some of the things I have learned, which I would like to share with fellow practitioners. Please point out any mistakes.
The Process of the Human Side Struggling with the Knowing Side
As soon as the Mid Autumn Divine Performing Arts Spectacular was over, we immediately began to sell tickets to the Chinese New Year Spectacular. An elderly practitioner phoned me after returning from New York, in the middle of being busy selling tickets. She told me that circumstances there were challenging and hoped for me to immediately go to New York to participate in ticket sales. Hearing that, I really wanted to cry. My human side began to struggle with the knowing side.
My knowing side steadfastly said, "I must go to New York to perfect and harmonize what Master wants."
The human side said, "Your husband works the night shift. If you leave, what about your child? What about the local ticket sales sites that you are responsible for? You have no more vacation time coming. If you want to take a leave, you won't get paid. How much money will this cost?"
The knowing side said, "Someone will take care of my child and I will arrange everything at the local ticket sales sites well. Can money be equated to what Master wants? Can it establish our own mighty virtue?"
The human side said, "You are coordinating several ticket sales sites here. If you go to New York you will only distribute materials on the street. Thus, you will play a less important role than here. Is it worth going there?"
The knowing side said, "No matter where Dafa disciples are, if only we put forth effort to do things we can all save sentient beings. Master only looks at our hearts."
The human side said, "The task of selling the tickets locally is heavy. No matter where you are you can do Dafa work, so it is unnecessary for you to go there."
The knowing side said, "That is only an excuse to hide the human side's fear of suffering."
The human side said, "If the practitioners in New York do not work hard, you will help the situation little."
The knowing side said,
"Master said,
'You have grown used to focusing on other people's shortcomings, and never take examining your own self seriously. When others' cultivation one day meets with success, what about you? Isn't Master hoping that you are cultivating well?' ("Teaching the Fa in the City of Los Angeles") (February 25, 2006)
I only listen to Master's words and cultivate myself well."
The human side said, "You are so steadfast; I no longer forbid you from going."
Gaining an Insight from My Son's Words and Actions
The night before I went to New York my six-year-old son was doing his homework. He stopped and said to me, "Mom, I feel bad and want to sleep." I touched his head and found it somewhat hot. I thought, "This is interference."
He noticed I was depressed and said to me, "Today after school, when Auntie (his classmate's mother) took us home, Daniel (his classmate) swirled me around, making me feel dizzy. He did not stop, no matter what I said. My head was also hurt." I asked him, "Didn't you tell Auntie?" He said, "No."
He looked at me and said, "Mom, please don't tell Auntie about this!" I asked him, "Why?" He said, "If you tell Auntie, she will punish Daniel and maybe hit him."
Hearing that I was pleased with him and ashamed of myself. I was glad to see my son's compassion for others. I felt ashamed that I had not let go of my attachment to blaming others.
I encouraged my son immediately, "I will not tell her. You did so well and can be considerate of others. You are really Master's good young disciple." He was glad to tell me, "Thank you. Please play Master's lecture for me to listen to. I will get some sleep, and tomorrow I will be well and continue to do my homework."
The next morning he got up and then sat on the stairs and asked me, "Mom, why is the rotating circle (Falun) so big?" I replied, " Because you are doing well, so Master is encouraging you and shows you a very big Falun." He was very glad and said, "It is really very beautiful and has many colors." (I am regretful I cannot see it.)
He sat down and finished his homework, and then went to school on time.
This incident made me think of my recent state of mind. When I saw other practitioners' attachments during ticket sales and heard feedback about practitioners not doing well and knew of the negative atmosphere for ticket sales in New York, I would complain in my mind. After these thoughts accumulated, they affected me and made me worried and unsettled. With notions such as that, how can I do the job of a ticket sales coordinator well?
My son's words and actions gave me great insights: being compassionate to others is equal to being compassionate to ourselves. I will be full of compassion in offering sentient beings salvation and filled with strong righteous thoughts, to go to New York to harmonize what Master wants.
Master Gave Me an Opportunity to Make Up a Missed Lesson
We boarded the bus at night and arrived in New York the next morning. I took two elderly practitioners to three subway transfers and finally reached the most prosperous supermarket near the theater. The passersby were in a hurry. I shouted quickly, "Holiday Wonders! Christmas Show!" I tried my best to give every passerby an opportunity to accept my information. Many people did accept the materials right away.
After a long time I had almost finished distributing the materials. The sky grew cloudy and dark. I debated whether or not we could go back for a rest. An elderly practitioner said it was 2:00 p.m. I continued distributing materials for a while and then asked the practitioner the time again. He told me it was 2:30 p.m. At that time I felt that time was going by so slowly. I noticed that the two elderly practitioners were cordially and compassionately distributing materials to each passerby. I also noticed that a fellow practitioner dressed as a Chinese emperor wore the heavy costume and wore a helmet-like crown that gripped his head tightly. He stood there from early morning and had little rest and cheerfully distributed the materials to his "subjects."
I felt extremely ashamed. I found a huge disparity between the fellow practitioners and me. I was doing these tasks from the standpoint of wanting to finish, while those practitioners were doing the work with a compassionate mindset and from the standpoint of offering sentient beings salvation.
I finally persevered in distributing the materials until 6:30 p.m. All the materials were distributed, and we were hungry. I thought it was time to leave. Right then, the coordinating practitioner brought ten bundles of special editions of the Epoch Times newspaper by car and told us, "This supermarket is open 'till 1:00 a.m." I blurted out, "Should we distribute the materials until 1:00 a.m.?" The coordinator started to distribute the materials and then told me, "Let us try our best. It is so urgent."
Seeing other practitioners spontaneously take up the materials and continue to distribute them to the passersby, I suddenly realized that it was the opportunity that Master gave me to make up for a missed course, so I should not miss it.
I have had the role of a media reporter to validate the Fa since I started my cultivation practice. I have heard a lot of praise from fellow practitioners. For the past few years I have been the ticket sales sites coordinator. I had done little in distributing materials in Chinatown and being on duty in front of the consulate. This distribution of flyers on the streets was a good test. I appreciate the opportunity that Master gave me.
One's Cultivation Should Naturally Lead to Compassion and It Is Not Merely for Show
Seeing people accept my handouts with a smile made me think, "You are so fortunate and know it is precious." Seeing people who walked on by and looked straight ahead made me think, "You are so miserable. You are missing the opportunity to see beautiful things." When seeing their disdain and irritation, I thought, "You are so pitiful. You cannot even discern between what is good and evil."
When I had negative thought processes, fewer and fewer people accepted my handouts. By contrast, the two elderly practitioners a dozen meters away from me distributed more and more materials, even though they could not speak English. When they handed someone a flyer they smiled genuinely and in a gentle voice spoke two English phrases they just learned, "Holiday Wonders! Christmas Show!" They emitted a kind of compassionate field that made people want to accept their handouts. Many people accepted their flyers and then asked me for further information.
When I realized my incorrect thoughts and lack of compassion I sent righteous thoughts to eliminate my negative mindset and tried my best to smile and show genuine compassion to everyone.
I encountered two fashionable Chinese women. I told them in Chinese, "Christmas Show! The best Christmas gift! The whole family can go to enjoy it." Unexpectedly, they looked at me and said, "We are not interested in it at all." I watched them walk away and a negative thought emerged, "It is useless to be fashionable. They don't even care about their traditional culture." Right then someone took a handout about the show from my hand. I turned around and found a Westerner standing in front of me saying, "Thank you!" He held the handout and pointed at me with a smile and then left. His smile reminded me that I should not let my concentration waver and should do the job without losing focus. I discovered eventually that whenever I did not concentrate or wanted to see the surroundings, someone would take the initiative to ask me for materials. I realized the hints and encouragement that Master gave me, to treat every person with kindness and grasp the time to offer sentient beings salvation.
From my experiences, I have several suggestions: Practitioners who are in charge of long-term coordination or who are taking time for projects should participate in the difficult undertaking of ticket sales in New York, personally distribute materials on the street, and clarify the truth about Dafa to people and sell tickets door-to-door. In this process you can directly feel that Master is helping us eliminate the bad substances and attachments that have long existed and been hidden. When we do repetitious coordination work, we will find our job easier and more successful and can become complacent.
If we think we are too busy with our own projects and have no time to leave we can ask ourselves, "Would we go if a Fa conference was being held? Would we go if there was a project meeting and a chance to see Master?" It seems that under these circumstances we often hurry and go. At these times, why are we able part with our own projects?
Let us all cherish the repeated opportunities Master provides us!
The above is my personal understanding. Please point out any mistakes.