(Clearwisdom.net) I grew up in China under the rule of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP), which has destroyed China's civilization and traditional culture that has spanned several thousand years. As a result, the standards for mankind that were created by divine beings in the times of ancient China have become degenerate. Those of us who grew up in Communist China have a deviated understanding of how to be good people in a typical society like those outside of CCP-controlled China.

Teacher has come to rectify the Fa and thus, we have come to cultivate ourselves during the time of Teacher's Fa-rectification. The paths we are creating today will become examples for future generations. With that in mind, we should strive to do everything in the most righteous way.

Teacher taught us that the traditional characteristics of "benevolence, righteousness, etiquette, wisdom and trustworthiness" are the principles to be a good person. However, I have realized that I didn't embody these qualities in my daily life. I have had a lot of conflicts because of the CCP culture that has been instilled in me. These conflicts could have been easily avoided.

My mother and I are both Falun Gong practitioners but we still have conflicts with each other from time to time. Oftentimes when I see an attachment in my mother, I became annoyed and irritated so I pointed out her problem to her in an impatient manner.

Typically, my mother would complain that I talk as though I were shooting or attacking her. When she found my attitude unacceptable, she would talk back in defense. Therefore, we often argued with each other emotionally when we met and sometimes our meetings even ended in fights.

I have sworn to change myself many times but I couldn't help but repeat the same behavior whenever I saw my mother. Finally I decided to reflect on my attachment of belligerence because I then made up my mind to eliminate it.

I began to reflect calmly, "Why am I able to be civil and kind when I talk to all other fellow practitioners I know except my own mother?" I think it's because of my feelings that I have towards my mother. She is family so I felt that I didn't have to care about the consequences when I talked to her. Moreover, I seemed to have higher expectations for my mother which is a reflection of my attachment to feelings and sentimentality.

In the New Tang Dynasty Television's (NTDTV) 2006 Chinese New Year Spectacular, there was a dance program entitled, "The Loyalty of Yue Fei," which tells the story of Yue Fei, a loyal general of the Song Dynasty and one of the most famous generals in China. During the performance, when Yue Fei's mother came to check on a military exercise, everyone in Yue Fei's army paid respect to her right away. The next scene, Yue Fei knelt down before his mother.

Compared to Yue Fei, I have been a degenerate daughter because I didn't show any filial respect for my parents. A cultivator should not be attached to any worldly interest, a cultivator should transcend the principles of the secular world and use our wisdom to see through interpersonal relationships that are driven by the principle of cause and effect. Also, we should govern ourselves with higher standards based on the Fa's principles in order to keep elevating in our cultivation.

I decided that this is not about using the potential conflicts with my mother to eliminate my attachment to belligerence. I should never have argued with my mother at all because she is an elder and I should have respect for an elder. As a fellow practitioner, I should also cultivate myself. When I see a problem in other people, I must search inward to improve myself. If I decide to communicate with her about a problem I see in her, I should do so in a respectful and benevolent manner. This is what I should strive to achieve.

I also remembered my relationship with my mother-in-law. Before I started practicing Falun Gong, I would go on for three days and complain about how nastily she had treated me. Now that I am practicing Falun Gong, I know that everything is a result that comes from the principle of cause and effect and I should let go of the infringements upon my reputation, self-interests and feelings. Nevertheless, I still found it very difficult to let go. In fact, I often found myself fighting with her out of anger like an everyday person. I tried to let go of my feelings and grievances, but I was unable to do so and I felt very upset about it. Now I have identified my attachment to hatred, revenge, belligerence and jealousy and thus, I am determined to eliminate them.

As I continued to search inward, I realized that I had done poorly in etiquette as well. In the past, I had never treated my mother-in-law with filial respect as though she were my own mother and I didn't have a proper relationship with my mother-in-law because I didn't see her as an elder. Instead, I had fought against her as though she were my peer. In ancient Chinese times, a daughter-in-law must pay filial respect towards her parents-in-law and that should be the conduct of a decent person. In today's Chinese society, the traditional value of filial respect has become extinct. In fact, it is a very common social problem in China in which in-laws are abused. This is a sign of the degenerate nature of the Chinese Communist regime.

I have also had problems with my younger brothers who used to bother me a lot. We are in our 30's and 40's already, but my two younger brothers often treat me with disrespect whenever we meet. They would complain about me, confront me, they even order me around and moreover, they repeatedly pick on me. In the past, I repeatedly endured and thought that these were "xinxing" tests. Of course, this is a problem for me to work on as a cultivator but the problem has lasted for a few years. Sometimes, I would avoid them because I didn't want to be bullied. Later I finally realized that it was because I had degenerate thinking and that my energy field was not righteous so my brothers would behave unrighteously around me. Respecting older siblings and looking after younger siblings are basic principles of mankind. I didn't follow these principles that were once cherished in the past. I thought my brothers were nasty to me because they were to create conflicts for me to enhance my xinxing. Now, I believe that they are supposed to treat me with respect because I am their older sister so I have decided to deny the old forces' arrangements. Once I enlightened to this principle, I hinted to them about the principle of respect for one's older siblings. Since that day, my two brothers have been treating me with respect and my family has become harmonious.

I have noticed similar problems in some fellow practitioners around me. They too, have fallen prey to the evil beings' exploitations because they didn't understand these principles of mankind. A fellow practitioner babysits for her daughter-in-law, cooks and does laundry for her but her daughter-in-law does not appreciate it. This practitioner keeps on enduring her daughter-in-law's actions because she thinks that because she is a cultivator, she is consuming her karma. She slaves for her daughter-in-law all day and has little time to do the three things. In fact, she has acknowledged the old forces' arrangements for her personal cultivation and fails to realize that this is a trap set by the old forces and is a form of persecution. I believe that Teacher will solve all malevolent relationships with benevolent solutions when we do the three things well.

A fellow practitioner once shared her understanding about this. She told her children, "I am done raising you. My job is done. It's time for you to look after your parents. You are very fortunate because I am in good health since I started practicing Falun Gong and will not be a burden to you. You must not interfere with my practicing Falun Gong any longer." Thus her children can understand why she practices Falun Gong and supports her decision. She now has more time dedicated to clarifying the truth about Falun Gong to save sentient beings.

I have also noticed another common problem among practitioners. There are many couples who are both practitioners but they have frequently fought with each other for a long time. Although some of the conflicts may be arranged by Teacher to eliminate their respective attachments and to enhance their cultivation, other conflicts should have been avoided especially if they have severely interfered with in their truth-clarification work. The CCP's propaganda taught people in China that "men and women are equal" and that "women can support half of the sky." Consequently, many women in China are highly competitive and masculine. These unnatural qualities are the root cause of domestic conflicts. Mainland Chinese women want to boss their husbands around and be the ones who makes the decisions in the marriage. Mainland Chinese women strive to win all their arguments with their husbands. Some women feel they are more successful in their career and they look down on their husbands. They also try to compete against their husbands and want to have the power and the say in the marriage.

Based on the principles of Truthfulness, Compassion and Tolerance, women should have a gentle personality. In ancient Chinese times, women were expected to be gentle and obedient as lambs. In ancient Chinese marriages, the husband was the boss and the wife assisted her husband in achieving his goals. Even a very capable woman was expected to exhibit feminine qualities such as modesty, gentility, thoughtfulness, etc. A Chinese woman during ancient times must have respect for her husband's leading status in the household. If a husband and wife don't have a good understanding of this concept, then conflicts tend to arise frequently between them.

That Yin and the Yang have become inverted in today's Chinese society. This has manifested in the relationships between elders and young people as well as in between men and women. This abnormal phenomena has been created by the celestial changes in the old universe and they have to do with the degenerated beings at high levels. Starting with ourselves, we should follow the righteous Fa principles taught by Teacher and rectify these degenerated phenomena in our energy fields. By doing so, we will also assist Teacher in His Fa-rectification.