(Clearwisdom.net) Since the autumn of 2003, my husband frequently spoke of another woman with whom he claimed to be having an affair. At that time, I did not take it to heart. In 2006, he did not come home for more than fifty days. He did not call me at all during this period. When I called him, he hung up on me. Later I got help from my family to look for him. When he returned, he told me that he had been staying at that woman's place all this time. After hearing all of this, I appeared very calm. But in my heart, I was all mixed up and confused. At this time, one sentence from Master's article "True Cultivation" (Essentials for Further Advancement) appeared in front of my eyes. It was "Only when you are about to let go of your reputation, interests, and feelings will you feel pain." It is so painful precisely because it is meant to let us let go of the feelings among ordinary people and all ordinary human attachments?
After calming down, I thought about how a cultivator should handle this matter. I discussed this with a fellow practitioner whom I had worked with for many years. We had a discussion from the perspective of the Fa. From my personal perspective, all suffering and pain and tribulations that I met with are caused by my own karma. As a Falun Gong cultivator, I should elevate my mind nature and not be attached to the sufferings and bliss of the ordinary human world. This is the difference from being an ordinary human. I have no choice. From the perspective of assimilating to the Fa and offering salvation to sentient beings, I should clarify the truth about Falun Gong to the woman whom my husband is having the affair with and also validate Falun Gong.
I bought some food for my child and then went to that women's house with my husband. The moment I sat down, all my human attachments came up. I felt like crying but I immediately asked Master to give me strength. I must not cry. I managed to calm down very quickly. I started to clarify the truth to the woman and her family members. I told them why I came and the reason for my visit etc. I spoke a lot and her father told me that I am an extraordinary woman and I am great. I told him that it is not because of that I am great. I said, "It is because I am a Falun Gong practitioner thus I'm able to handle the situation this way. I would like all of you to remember 'Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance' and 'Falun Gong is good'." All of them agreed.
When I came out of their house, my human attachments came out again. Thus I started to memorize in my head "True cultivation" (Essentials for Further Advancement). I went through the article in my head many times before my heart managed to gradually calm down. I thought, Master must have gone through a lot for my sake when I was undergoing this tribulation. Thus I must pass this tribulation.
Many people from my family came to learn about this matter. Through this matter, I validated the Fa and clarified the truth about Falun Gong to them. My husband's elder sister did not understand and refused to listen when other people tried to clarify the truth about Falun Gong to her or persuade her to renounce her membership in the Chinese Communist Party and its affiliated organizations. However because of this matter, she said to me, "When I saw how you handled this problem, I felt Falun Gong is great. If all people start to learn Falun Gong, the country will be better. I am a member of a CCP organization. Please help me to renounce my membership."
From this incident, many of my human attachments were exposed. They included the attachments to competition, jealousy, selfishness, anger, resentment, feeling of unfairness. Whenever these ordinary human attachments surface, I would send righteous thoughts to eliminate them. They are not the real me.
To be able to reach this state, I would have to have a deeper understanding of the phrase "The cultivation is up to you, gong is up to the master" ("Why Doing Cultivation Exercises Doesn't Increase Gong" Lecture One, Zhuan Falun )