(Clearwisdom.net) I am a 43-year-old Falun Dafa practitioner from Heilongjiang Province. I started practicing Falun Dafa at the end of June 1999. Prior to that, I had serious skin diseases. Yellow fluid would seep from my skin over large areas of my body and from my bone joints. My whole head and face had edema and were covered in a foul-smelling yellow fluid. My hair had fallen out. I also had serious heart disease, hyperthyroidism, thickening blood, kidney disease, flatulence, long-term intestinal dryness and hemato-chezia. I sought doctors and experts from all over the country in hopes of finding one that could cure me. I went to every well-known hospital, tried Chinese and Western medicine, as well as all kinds of folk prescriptions. No matter how hard I tried, my condition improved only temporarily and sometimes it got worse. A Chinese proverb goes, "One sees a doctor blindly when one is sick." I tried all kinds of qigong, believed in Buddhism, worshiped Buddhist statues and even worshiped low-level spirits, causing me to unknowingly incur spirit possession. Over the course of several years, I spent a lot of money without getting my diseases cured. Struggling with the pain and sickness, I felt it was worse to live than to die. When I felt I had no way out, I heard about the wonders of Falun Dafa. And that's how I started practicing Falun Dafa.
Initially, when my skin disease was serious, I couldn't lie down because yellow fluid would drip from my head. With my fellow practitioners' help, I started watching videos of Teacher's lectures. In listening to the lectures, I realized that every word Teacher said was the truth, and I understood many high-level principles. I was fascinated by the profound principles that Teacher articulated, and forgot all about my illnesses. Miracles happened on the third day: my constipation and flatulence disappeared, the spirit possession was removed, and I could eat.
My heart was full of joy and I studied the Fa every day. However, on July 20, 1999, the Communist Party's evil persecution started. All of my friends, neighbors and family members came to accuse me. They asked me not to believe in Falun Dafa any more. I told them, "There's nothing wrong with cultivating Truth-Compassion-Tolerance and being a better person. Regardless of what the TV and other media say, why are they arresting people who are trying to be good people? What is this Communist regime doing? It is now forbidden to be a good person; isn't this country heading towards destruction then? No matter what others say, I am determined to practice Falun Dafa and to be a good person."
My friends and family members accused me of having cultivation insanity. They disturbed my Fa-study every day, chastised me and urged me to go to a hospital. They said they refused to believe how illnesses could be cured by not taking any medicine. I wasn't affected by them. Instead, I continued watching the lecture videos every day, and stopped taking all medicines. During the first twenty days, my home was full of the smell of Chinese medicines. In the second twenty days, it was full of the smell of penicillin. This was the purification of my body, eliminating all the medicine I had taken before in trying to cure my illnesses. Within two months, Teacher removed all the medicine that I ingested over the years. The edema on my head and face disappeared, and all of my diseases disappeared. Within half a year I even grew a full head of hair. Later on I realized it was because of my thought to be determined in cultivating Truth-Compassion-Tolerance and be a good person, that Teacher removed my sickness karma with immeasurable mercy. Through my experience, people around me witnessed the magnificence and wonder of Falun Dafa.
At that time I didn't realize that I should step out and validate the Fa. I only read Zhuan Falun. I knew Falun Dafa was cultivation in the Buddha school, but I didn't know about Fa-rectification. When practitioners from my area began stepping out and went to Beijing to validate Dafa, I couldn't understand it. I thought, "Having begun such a wonderful Fa practice, we should practice at home; why go outside and get hurt?" My husband worked in the government and was in charge of preventing Falun Gong practitioners from going to Beijing. I often told him that Falun Gong practitioners were all good people and not to treat them badly.
Just reading Zhuan Falun at home, I didn't understand the Fa much. I didn't cultivate diligently, and didn't know about looking within when facing conflicts. When I had time, I would practice the exercises, and other times I simply skipped doing them. I was busy with ordinary people's affairs and didn't give the Fa first priority. At the beginning of 2002, fearing that I would go to Beijing to appeal for justice for Falun Gong, my husband destroyed my copy of Zhuan Falun. After not reading the book for several months, my sickness karma returned, and I started to take medicine.
Through one of Teacher's painstaking arrangements I met a practitioner who helped me return to the Fa. When I obtained a copy of Teacher's, Touring North America to Teach the Fa, I experienced an earth-shattering awakening. I realized that I had failed to keep up with the Fa-rectification's progress. I thought, "I must keep up with the Fa-rectification's progress, make up for the shortcomings in my past cultivation practice, be responsible to the sentient beings in my cosmic sphere, not let Teacher down, and not miss such a precious opportunity that so rarely happens in such a long, long time."
From then on I would get up at 3:00 a.m. I would clean the scabs from my body and practice the standing exercises immediately afterwards. Unless I removed the scabs, the skin on the major joints of my body would crack and seep yellow fluid as soon as I did the stretching exercise. I would also bandage my joints. I would send forth righteous thoughts every hour and read two chapters of Zhuan Falun, as well as Teacher's new articles and Essentials for Further Advancement. I would recite poems from Hong Yin, "Expounding on the Fa," Lunyu, "True Cultivation," and other articles while doing housework such as washing clothes and cooking. This way I would fill my mind with the Fa at every moment. I wouldn't go to sleep until I finished sending forth righteous thoughts at 12:00 a.m.
Through studying Teacher's overseas lectures and raising my xinxing, with other practitioners' help, I came to understand that my sickness karma was also persecution from the old forces. Because I had many attachments and had many omissions, the old forces were using this method to try to stop me from continuing cultivation practice and to attempt to demolish my will. I knew I must totally negate the old forces' arrangements and take the path that Teacher has arranged for me, assist Teacher in the Fa-rectification, and offer salvation to sentient beings.
I couldn't cross both legs in the sitting meditation then, let alone sit for one hour. To resist the persecution, I negated the old forces. I demanded myself to practice the sitting meditation twice a day, with both legs crossed. Large skin areas and every big bone joint would seep yellow fluid and the skin covering the joints was completely gone. I had to bandage the joints before I sat down and meditated. I would recite Teacher's poem,
"A Great Enlightened Being does not fear hardship
Having forged an adamantine will
And with no attachment to living or dying
He walks his path of Fa-rectification openly and nobly"("Righteous Thoughts and Righteous Actions")
When I crossed my legs I could feel the skin stretch. The pain was like someone spilling hot oil on me. I endured the sharp pain for 15 minutes, then 20 minutes. I made breakthroughs little by little in this painful suffering and recited the Fa:
"When it's difficult to endure, you can endure it. When it's impossible to do, you can do it." "The master takes you through the entrance, and it is up to you, yourself to practice cultivation. It all depends upon how you, yourself practice cultivation. Whether you can practice cultivation all depends upon whether you can endure, sacrifice, and suffer. If you can commit your mind, no difficulties can stop you. I would say that there is not a problem." (Zhuan Falun, 2000 translation)
"Indestructible righteous faith in the cosmos's Truth forms benevolent Dafa disciples' rock-solid, Diamond-Like Bodies, it frightens all evil, and the light of Truth it emanates makes the unrighteous elements in all beings' thoughts disintegrate. However strong the righteous thoughts are, that's how great the power is." ("Also in a Few Words")
When I put my legs down, I couldn't move them freely until half an hour later. When I removed the bandages, they were always soaked with a discharge. Just like this, I tempered myself in cultivation practice through all kinds of hardships, and kept up with the Fa-rectification's progress. I have removed many attachments. During the process of several months of righteous thoughts and righteous actions, I made a breakthrough and could sit in meditation for one hour.
My body has undergone great changes and has grown new skin. This is yet another experience that has shown me Dafa's wonders and magnificence. I am sharing this today, hoping to tell other practitioners who have not yet done well with the sitting meditation, that as long as you have indestructible righteous thoughts, Teacher can do anything for His disciples.
During the past several years of practicing Dafa, I have been subjected to great interference from my family, which has affected my cultivation practice. My husband objected to me practicing cultivation from the beginning. He would not let me practice the exercises, not let me contact other practitioners or do anything related to Fa-rectification. Everyone on his side of the family objected to my practice. Whatever I did relating to the Fa-rectification had to be done without them knowing. As soon as I practiced the exercises, my husband would swear at me. Sometimes he would even swear at Buddha and the Fa.
My xinxing was initially affected by that, but through Fa study I realized that the old forces' dark minions used my husband to interfere with me. I sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate all the evil elements in other dimensions that were using him. I clarified the truth to him and to his side of the family, and let them see the huge difference that the Fa manifested in me. My family members have changed from opposing to supporting me now, and they have also witnessed some instances of karmic retribution. Now my environment has become much better; I can step out and validate Dafa with my family knowing about it, and I can freely go to daily group Fa study. Moreover, my husband and his family members have withdrawn from the evil Communist Party, one by one. In encouraging others to do the "three withdrawals," sometimes I have a mentality of just getting things done. When I am in this state I have to return to someone's home once or twice more to convince them to withdraw from the Communist Party and its affiliated organizations. Through Fa-study and looking inward, I have removed many attachments and much interference; now all the people that I have contacted have withdrawn from the evil party.
"Be quiet and think about the things that I am attached to, get rid of the human attachments and the evil will be defeated naturally." (from Hong Yin II, provisional translation)
Teacher's words often ring in my ears. Fa-rectification has come to the last stage; how many attachments do we still harbor? As long as there is interference and tribulations, it means that we have attachments. We can no longer humanly foster the evil demons and give the evil loopholes through which to take advantage of us. No matter whether the cultivation environment is free or restricted, we all must do the three things well that Teacher has told us to do and follow Teacher's requirement, "The closer to the end, the more diligent you should be."
My education is very limited. Please understand and kindly point out anything improper.
Jan. 5, 2006