Suggestions for Clarifying the Truth to Practitioners' Families
September 17, 2005
By a Falun Dafa practitioner in Mainland China
With our efforts to clarify the truth, more and
more people are awakening. But we often find a problem, namely that it is more
difficult to clarify the truth to the people we are close to. Many people we
don't know are willing to withdraw from the CCP, the Chinese Communist Youth
League and the Young Pioneers, or are willing to read some Falun Dafa books
after we explain the truth to them. Some of them even start to practice Falun
Gong. But for our family members this seems very difficult. Many practitioners
feel that this is a problem. We feel difficulties, especially when looking at
our relatives who are missing opportunities to be saved, and sometimes we feel
that there is not much we can do.
We analyzed the reasons that result in this kind of
situation. First we looked inside among our fellow practitioners.
- Attachments to the affections of loved one. After learning that clarifying
the truth is to save people, many practitioners' first thoughts are for
their family members. When their family members remain unmoved, the
practitioners may become anxious and worried about them. To persuade them,
the practitioner may become emphatic and raise his/her voice, but will only
achieve the opposite effect. The family member may think that the
practitioner has bad manners and is not kind. Some even might think that
Falun Gong practitioners have bad self-discipline. They may not really
disagree with Dafa to begin with, but the way the practitioner talks arouses
their resistant attitude. Our emotions lead us to appear unreasonable.
- Constantly stressing one's own thoughts. A fellow practitioner once spoke
with others about the truth. The way he explained the truth and his
reasoning had persuaded the other party. The other party said, "I
accept your explanation the way you presented it and I am also clear on what
you are talking about. However, when one of my relatives talked to me he
gave me the impression that only they, Falun Gong practitioners, know what
the truth is; all other people don't know what is going on. He kept talking
and would not give us any chance to talk."
We know through learning the Fa that people's varying points of view these
days have changed and they do not realize that their points of view have
deviated. We need to pay attention how we should talk to them when we tell
them the facts. We need to gradually lead them. We cannot talk in a way as if
they don't have anything correct to say. Criticizing them is not our purpose.
Our purpose in telling them the facts is to awaken their kindness and to guide
them onto the path of returning towards their origin, so that they can be
I often read articles written by fellow practitioners repeatedly
emphasizing that we should validate Dafa instead of validating ourselves. If
one keeps stressing that others are wrong so as to prove he is right, is he
validating Dafa? Is he emphasizing that Dafa is tolerant? On the contrary, he
is discrediting Dafa; others may think he is disturbing their lives; they may
refuse to let him come to their home any more.
- Not watching our behavior. When clarifying the truth to people other than
friends and relatives we pay more attention to our manner of speaking. When
talking to family members we may forget this and get into an argument when
the family member disagrees with us. This is then followed by an escalating
battle of words. This results in the other side having no interest in
listening to our truth clarification. All the other side thinks of is how to
get even with us, with thoughts of not letting us win to avoid losing face.
Thus, the other side opposes everything we say. This cannot achieve the
desired effect. It actually pushes the opponent to the opposite side. An
issue of concern is that some of our relatives are strongly against Dafa.
Some of this results from our own mistakes. We should pay attention to this.
We need to look inside for reasons if we find that the way we are clarifying
the truth has not achieved the desired effect. In addition, are there other ways
to alleviate this concern? Maybe having a fellow practitioner clarify the truth
to our family while we clarify the truth to their family can achieve a better
effect. The reasons are as follows:
- Being bored from listening to the same line of thought. One person's
understanding in one aspect sometimes remains at a certain level and the
things he says can sound familiar over a period of time. When he talks over
and over again with his family members they may get tired of listening. If
another practitioner comes, he may explain it from a different angle, and
what he says may sound different and acceptable to them; or what he talks
about may happen to be the key to unlocking their thoughts; they may then
accept the truth. In other words, when we cannot unlock a door with our key,
we can borrow another practitioner's keys to help unlock the mental door.
- Politeness. As just mentioned, when we tell the facts to our family
members there is a tendency for an argument to start. If a visitor comes,
the family members, out of politeness, may continue to listen. A family
member may change his original attitude and point of view as long as he is
willing to listen. With objective analysis of the evil nature of the CCP, of
withdrawing from the CCP, the Chinese Communist Youth League and the Young
Pioneers for self protection and so on, the visitor can mention at the end,
"If you are standing on the side of justice and if you are
compassionate, please do what is right." To show they are on the side
of justice and are compassionate, many people are willing to make the right
Having different people clarify the truth can be a practical
method in those circumstances where many of us feel that there is not much we
can do for our family members. Besides, we can also send our family members'
phone numbers to the Minghui website. We can ask for help from overseas Dafa
practitioners to call our family members. This will also give our family members
an opportunity to learn of the widespread acceptance of Falun Gong abroad.
The above is my limited understanding. Please kindly point
out any problems.
August 20, 2005