(Clearwisdom.net) Dear Master, hello fellow practitioners,
My name is Maria; I'm from Spain and have been a practitioner for four years. There have been many things worth looking back on over the past four years. Here, I'd like to share some experiences which have impressed and influenced me the deepest.
When I learned about Dafa, my situation was pretty complicated at that time, for various reasons. At first, my work was quite demanding, such that my body fell into a worse and worse state. I made up my mind to change my life from such a chaotic situation. I quit my job first and tried to look for another position. Besides that, I tried my best to recover my health. As a result of a chronic but benign tumor of the uterus and some complications such as high cholesterol, anemia, digestive ailment, and depression, my situation worsened gradually. The doctor said I needed to undergo an operation. However, coincidentally, at that time the doctors in the hospital were staging a long-term strike, so my operation was delayed for several months. The doctors decided to give me medication at first in a bid to control my ailment, and set up a series of treatments.
Around this time, a practitioner introduced me to Falun Gong. The cultivation system that the practitioner talked of aroused a huge interest in me. I wanted to try to cultivate immediately. I began to learn the five sets of Falun Gong exercises at his home. From that moment, I could not have imagined the immense transformation in my life.
The prompt change stunned me, and my health began to show improvement in a very short period of time. The heavy feeling in my body disappeared, my usual headache was healed, and food didn't harm me any longer. I truly experienced a sense of relief all over my body. Furthermore, I liked to practice the exercises very much, which made me feel relaxed and comfortable from the bottom of my heart. So, I placed the 6 or 7 kinds of medicines that I had brought home from the hospital into the recycle bin for medicine to be donated to the Third World. Falun Gong started to transform me. This was a very important point in my life, because from that time onward, I opened up to a deeper understanding of Dafa and a more diligent cultivation of Dafa.
After several months, I went to the hospital again. The doctor was very happy when he saw I that looked so great, and immediately said, "Look, my treatments worked for you." Following a series of examinations, the various readings of my body were all in the normal range; therefore, the doctor cancelled the previous operation plan. However, despite my recovery, the doctor still insisted on medication. Although I clearly knew my health was much better than the doctor could have imagined, I was still very pleased to have heard such a positive response from the doctor, and this helped me become more confident in the power of Dafa. The doctor arranged another appointment for a check-up again; however, I didn't go, because I knew I didn't need it any longer.
I kept practicing the exercises. When my body obviously changed for the better, I also noticed a transformation in my mind. Fa-study and practicing the exercises have gradually altered my attitudes and behavior, and my interaction with people. My discomfort and touchy mood began to settle down. My mentality of looking for new things disappeared. A generally dissatisfied mood about many things went away as well. I could feel all the people and everything around me becoming more calm and peaceful.
One day, on a Saturday morning, when I was cleaning my house, I instantly felt that I was surrounded by an immense peaceful presence, which not only covered my body but everything around me, like my clothes, the things in my hands, and even the air. In an instant, everything around me became so beautiful and peaceful. This was a brand new feeling, and I never experienced such a feeling before. It was so magical, so amazing. I realized that only after cultivating Dafa could I experience the compassion and mercy of Dafa.
After experiencing the "incomparably immense peacefulness," I deeply comprehended the precious teachings given by Master and the mercy Master gave to us. Although I didn't understand some teachings at that time, I firmly believed I would understand them in the long run if I kept cultivating. Thus, I didn't need to have doubts any more. Facing the immense Dafa, what I need to do is to diligently keep cultivating, and spread the immeasurable wonderfulness to more people. Experiencing such a beautiful moment, I made up my mind to keep cultivating. From this moment on, I truly stepped onto the path of returning to my origin, the true self.
This is also a milestone on my path of cultivation. At first, I only studied the Fa once a week, but then, after that experience, I began to study one lecture of Zhuan Falun every day with fellow practitioners. Meanwhile, I started to do some work for some Dafa websites. Working for the Dafa websites and having regular Fa-study opened up a new vision for my cultivation.
Through the work for the websites, I got to read a great amount of articles written by fellow practitioners every day. I could see the change in myself very quickly. I began to sense that other practitioners also encountered similar hardships as I did. Their experiences and understandings have helped me a lot, especially in my everyday work and even in all environments. I learned how to be patient, to listen to others' opinions and how to keep the mentality of a cultivator at all times while facing conflicts. Every article I translate and proofread has been a chance for me to elevate and look inside myself.
At the same time, I had a more profound understanding from those articles which exposed the persecution. I started to realize the importance and necessity of letting people around me know about the brutal persecution that is happening in China. Therefore, I told my family, colleagues, friends, neighbors, and even passersby about the facts of the persecution.
I remembered that when I mentioned Dafa to people before, I always spoke of the physical and psychological benefits that Dafa brought to people. Now I could add the facts about the persecution, so as to talk comprehensively about the truth of Dafa, because we cannot leave out the topic of persecution occurring in China when we mention Dafa. At the same time, as a Dafa practitioner, I felt more and more that I couldn't limit myself to the current work on websites and distributing leaflets. I needed to go out to tell the truth about Dafa in those cities that have no Dafa disciples. Among those inhabitants, there are many people who have predestined relationships, and they need to be saved as well.
In my view, it was another milestone in my cultivation for me to take part in the work on Dafa websites. During the year, I assisted in and participated in a series of Dafa activities. These activities were different and new to me. However, what these activities have in common is that they bring the truth and beauty of Dafa to more people and allow them to be saved.
For example, in March of this year, I had the honor to participate in a Fa-spreading activity held in Maspalomas on the southern part of the island during International Women's Day. When I heard of this activity for the first time, I actively took part because I knew this would be a good chance for a lot of people to learn about Dafa. I felt that I shouldered a great responsibility. On the other hand, this would be the first time for me to speak in front of so many people. I have never liked to public speaking, and I knew it would be very difficult for me. At this moment, Master's teaching appeared in my mind, "When it's impossible to do, you can do it." (Zhuan Falun) Therefore, I said firmly in the depth of my heart. "Yes, because this is what I should do." Only the strength of Dafa could help me make this decision, and only the strength of Dafa can help me leave all fears and worries behind.
This activity was very successful, and it subsequently brought about a series of activities. In Telde Germany, 20 kilometers from Maspalomas, members of a local women's organization formed a new practice site on their own initiative. In the meantime, they took up the work of distributing Dafa materials to people. They also contacted two local radio stations and a TV station to conduct interviews with practitioners, and filmed practitioners practicing the exercises in the park. The program was broadcast many times within one week, attracting a lot of local people to come to the practice site.
In this way, a group of new practitioners showed up in front of us. They were not only interested in practicing the exercises, but also began to study the Fa and to require themselves to act in accordance with the Fa. Looking at them, I felt again the heavy responsibility of being a Dafa practitioner and I understood that it was a very special opportunity for me to cultivate myself. On the one hand, I set a standard for myself to do well what I should do at any time, while on the other hand, I repeatedly reminded the new practitioners to assimilate to the principles of the Fa - "Truthfulness, Compassion, Forbearance" - and to treat everything with a kind heart. Thus, these principles of the Fa also grew stronger and stronger in my mind.
Next I would like to share with you one of my experiences of discovering my attachments and cultivating myself through Dafa activities.
During Fa study and exchanging experiences with all Dafa practitioners in Spain over the Internet, a fellow practitioner mentioned the idea of a new project: introducing Dafa and Dafa books to bookshops in order for Dafa books to be sold in every large bookshop. I remember the fellow practitioner said: "There are a lot of people who have predestined relationships but live in places where we might not get to. If Dafa books are sold in bookshops there, Master's Law Body will guide them to the bookshop to buy the book and then learn about Dafa." When I heard this, I immediately felt the project's importance, though I did not know at that time what to do. I clearly knew that it was what I should do and it was also part of my cultivation. With the help of that fellow practitioner, I visited many bookshops in my city, the result being very good. At present, the Spanish edition of Zhuan Falun is sold in four bookshops in my city, and the retailers are also ordering Zhuan Falun in a larger quantity.
Seeing this result, I felt very satisfied. I remember one day on my way home from the bookstore, when I analyzed my "satisfaction" conscientiously, I found a heart of "happiness." I asked myself several questions, such as "Where does this happiness come from?" "Am I really happy because more lives are being saved?" "If the result were not good, would you have the same feeling?" I began conscientiously and honestly to look inwards through these questions. Suddenly, I recalled the above-mentioned experience of "incomparable immense peacefulness." Comparatively, though both the two experiences are pleasant, there is a great difference between them.
That "incomparable immense peacefulness" was silent and derived from "nothingness," while the happiness in the latter case came from "desire," desiring for results. The former came from deep in my heart, while the latter came from outside directly. The former is beautiful and far-reaching, while the latter is superficial and illusory. The difference between them is as far apart as heaven and earth. Master says in Zhuan Falun:
"Let me tell you a story from Buddhism. There once was a person who became an Arhat after much effort in cultivation. As he was just about to attain Right Fruit in cultivation and become an Arhat, how could he not be happy? He was going to transcend the Three Realms! Yet this excitement is an attachment, an attachment of elation. An Arhat should be free of attachments, with a heart that cannot be affected. But he failed, and his cultivation ended up in vain. Since he failed, he had to start all over again. He resumed his cultivation, and after much painstaking effort he again succeeded in his cultivation. This time he became scared and reminded himself in his mind: "I shouldn't get excited. Otherwise, I'll fail again." With this fear, he failed again. Fear is also a kind of attachment."
My own understanding is that being Dafa practitioners we should be able to "be in a state of non-action, with a mind that's unshakable." In fact, everything has been arranged by Master, and we just carry out the work normally in everyday society in accordance with Master's arrangement, while cultivating ourselves at the same time. [We must have] Righteous thoughts and action. We must require ourselves to act in accordance with the Fa. Don't be afraid because it is difficult or because we do not know how to do it. Don't arouse happiness because of good achievements. Only by so doing can we become as,
"With no attachment to anything, The path underfoot is naturally clear."
("No Obstacles," Hong Yin II; provisional translation)
Little by little, I discovered in my heart the attachments of happiness, fear, and showing off. In general, "selfishness" still appeared from time to time in my actions. Yet, I could not sense it most of the time because it hid in an extremely obscure way. Had I not experienced that "enormous peacefulness" it would be very difficult to find my selfishness and I would not stop to look for my attachments. Meanwhile, in every Dafa activity and at every opportunity, we should always take the initiative to do the work because by being active we can have more opportunities to unravel the attachments hidden deeply in ourselves. If we give up these opportunities, we might not discover these attachments.
I wish to take this opportunity to express my deep gratitude to our merciful Master, to his saving me with mercy, to Master's teachings about the universe's law of Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance, and to Master's meticulous care of us on the road of cultivation!
Many thanks to my fellow practitioners too. Let us vigorously forge ahead, shoulder to shoulder.
The above is my personal understanding. Please kindly correct me if there is anything inappropriate.