(Clearwisdom.net) I was shocked by the torture deaths of fellow Falun Gong practitioner Ms. Wang Shouhui and her son Liu Boyang. They died within two weeks of each other. Wang Shouhui's smile is still vivid in my mind. I miss her and want to see her again, but this wish will never be fulfilled.

On October 7, 2001, Ms. Wang Shouhui was sent to the police hospital. She had been illegally sentenced to the Heizuizi Women's Forced Labor Camp in Changchun City for 20 months and was on the brink of death after holding a hunger strike. She was skin and bones and had a serious look on her face. She was handcuffed when she was sent to the hospital, where we met.

On September 30, 2001, I held a hunger strike to protest being subjected to the "Death Bed Torture," and to protest the persecution by the authorities of the Heizuizi Forced Labor Camp. The guards force-fed me concentrated salt water. The saline solution created a burning sensation in my stomach and I vomited, but no one cleaned it up. The vomit stuck to my hair. The collaborators called me "flytrap" to insult me. Several days later, they inserted a feeding tube into my trachea and the filthy salt water and soy powder entered my lungs. I lost consciousness and was sent to the police hospital for emergency treatment.

Because I was not clear on the Fa principles, I thought the police hospital would not persecute me, so I started drinking porridge. I passively endured the tribulation. I was diagnosed with "open lung tuberculosis." With the guards' consent, the inmates moved me from the ward to the hallway. Two days later Ms. Wang Shouhui arrived. After I learned that she refused to "break away from Falun Gong" and was continuing a hunger strike my confidence was boosted and I immediately refused to eat or receive medical treatment. Wang Shouhui was vomiting blood due to long-term force-feeding. The inmates suspected her of also having tuberculosis and moved her to the hallway next to me. I felt so happy to be with her.

The inmates pinched their noses and walked as far away from me as possible, yet Wang Shouhui always smiled at me. I thought she was in her 30s but she was actually 53 years old. Seeing that I was breathing rapidly and could die any time, she did the sitting meditation, sent forth righteous thoughts next to me and shared her experiences and understandings with me in a low voice. She told me how she did the exercises at the Heizuizi Forced Labor Camp and insisted on doing the exercises, especially when the vicious division head was on duty.

She talked about when she held a hunger strike to protest the persecution and her husband came to visit her, how they were able to meet by sending forth righteous thoughts, and we shared our understandings based on the Fa. I sincerely admired her and my righteous thoughts were strengthened. The guard came out to curse us, but she didn't mind in the least. We soon realized that we should not cooperate with medical treatment and we refused to take injections from the labor camp doctor. We were handcuffed and shackled. The handcuffs were fixed so we could not move. The doctor tried to forcibly inject us, but one of us bit the needle and the other one kicked over the IV bottle rack, and the bottle fell on the floor and shattered. Inmate Min and the guard heard the noise and came over. They slapped my face and loudly cursed us.

Master told us,

We did as Master said. Because I followed Master's words, I went home later the same day, and Wang Shouhui returned home the next day. We left the den of evil where the death rate of the admitted patients is 50%. Master's compassion and protection enabled us to regain our personal freedoms and to have opportunities to better validate Dafa in society.

Three months later I met Wang Shouhui again. Her face was rosy and she looked very young. She told me that she was worried about me at the police hospital, that she was afraid the old forces' influence would take me away, so she didn't relent for a moment and continuously sent forth righteous thoughts and exchanged her understandings on the Fa with me. She helped me overcome the tribulation with righteous thoughts.

I asked about her circumstances after I had left. She told me that the doctor gave her the remaining IV drugs that were to be used on me. It was medication for treating tuberculosis, although she was not diagnosed with tuberculosis. She solemnly told the doctor, "My son works in the medical field. Why are you giving me medication for tuberculosis even though I don't have tuberculosis? I'll keep this bottle and sue you after I get out." The doctor immediately took away the bottle and dared not give her more injections. They released her the following day. After she returned home, although she was physically traumatized from a long-term hunger strike, she did not regard herself as a patient but acted like a normal, healthy person. She cooked and did laundry. One month later, her weight had increased from 66 pounds to 100 pounds, and her complexion was rosy. I listened to her understandings based on the Fa. I felt they were great and she was able to look at things with righteous thoughts.

Nearly four years have passed since our last meeting. During these four years I often heard how Wang Shouhui was persecuted and believed each time that she would do well. I always remembered her encouraging face and thought about why she would have to suffer such severe persecution.

Several months ago I really wanted to meet with her but I could not. This time, because I was not in a good state, I only sent forth righteous thoughts once for her and her son. After I heard that she and her son died from persecution, other practitioners pointed out that I was indulging in emotion and did not concentrate on validating Dafa, which is why I was indifferent toward Wang Shouhui and her son. It's true that I didn't send forth righteous thoughts and had not asked other practitioners to send forth righteous thoughts. I had not done anything to help them, which is in fact acknowledging the old forces. Of course they died because of the evil persecution, but if I could let go of self, if more practitioners could regard the persecution of fellow practitioners as their personal persecution, then our righteous thoughts would be able to eliminate the old forces' arrangements. I did not treat her and other practitioners with the sense of responsibility with which she helped me, and I feel terrible for that. The evil probably would have taken my life from me back then, had it not been for Wang Shouhui's helping me with righteous thoughts. If I had sent forth righteous thoughts for her more frequently and used more effective methods to rescue her, maybe she would have returned to us. Dafa practitioners are a whole body!

Wang Shouhui left us. Not being able to persevere until the day of Fa rectification of the human world must be her greatest regret.

As I finished this article, one resolute thought arose in my mind, "I will firmly guard my righteous thoughts under any circumstances and truly take responsibility for sentient beings. I absolutely will not give up this human body, which I use to validate Dafa, before the Fa rectification is finished."

When I needed help the most, with Master's teachings, Wang Shouhui helped me overcome the tribulation, and she supported me with righteous thoughts so the old forces could not take me away, yet I didn't help fellow practitioners in the same way. With this regret I say to Wang Shouhui in my heart/mind, "I will cherish the path we shared together, and I will walk well on the remaining path from now on."

I learned from this mistake and I will take solid steps to treat other practitioners' concerns as my own.