(Clearwisdom.net)
I began to sincerely look within myself after I was forced to attend a "transformation" class for brainwashing and was persecuted. Also, after seeing how fellow practitioners acted while detained, I came to realize where I fell short.
While detained, I saw how the evil people took advantage of practitioners' loopholes to interfere with our assisting Teacher in rectifying the Fa and saving sentient beings. If practitioners had the attachment of fear and looked scared, the authorities took advantage of them by using their fear to obtain information, including information about other practitioners they knew. If practitioners had a strong attachment to showing off and thought highly of themselves, they were tricked into talking until they revealed where the materials came from and other relevant information. As to irrational practitioners, their shortcoming is magnified and brought to the attention of others to undermine Dafa. Practitioners that did something wrong and then realized it were made to feel that they didn't deserve to be Dafa practitioners. If these practitioners then gave up cultivation, the authorities were able to obtain information from them. Practitioners who remained steadfast in their cultivation were brutally tortured.
Teacher said in "Be Clearheaded" (a comment on a student's article "Strictly Take the Fa as Teacher, of Our Own Initiative Destroy VCD's Not Published by Master"):
"If you, as a student [of Dafa], do not follow Master's requirements, it is definitely no simple thing. The old forces have arranged for all Dafa disciples a set of their things, so if a Dafa disciple doesn't follow Master's requirements, he must be following the old forces' arrangements. The old forces are in essence gigantic trials and tribulations that accompany you at all times, focused on whether in Fa-rectification Dafa disciples are able to step forward."
Sometimes when we are muddleheaded, we don't have a clear understanding of Dafa. Even though we still clarify the truth and save sentient beings, we don't always comply with the standards of a Fa-rectification period Dafa disciple. If our primary focus is only our own self-improvement and self-enlightenment, and if we are not compassionate to sentient beings when saving them, then without realizing it, the strong attachment of pursuit interferes with our clarifying the truth and assisting Teacher in Fa-rectification. For these practitioners, after they are arrested, they are still not very clear or rational.
If we are not clear, if we do not consciously resolve the tribulation, and if we don't cultivate ourselves well, then how can we say that we are wholeheartedly being responsible to others and saving sentient beings with a true heart? Or are we doing things only for self-improvement and self-enlightenment?
We should not always think that the old forces are the only ones who need to be eliminated and rectified during the Fa-rectification. Do not think that just because we are Dafa practitioners, we do not need to rectify ourselves. Some practitioners who do not follow Teacher's requirements, who do not take assimilating to Dafa seriously, or who do not take the initiative to get rid of their selfishness believe that by doing more Dafa work, they can achieve enlightenment. With a heart of pursuing security and enlightenment in Dafa, they misunderstand Teacher's Fa and Teacher's compassion.
Some practitioners, while handing out materials and clarifying the facts about the persecution, are also fighting for fame, profit and qing like an ordinary person. When everyday people observe this behavior, they start suspecting the integrity of our materials. Then who indeed is preventing sentient beings from getting to know the truth and being saved? Who is interfering with Teacher's Fa-rectification? Then are we not undermining Dafa's reputation under the banner of Dafa?
If we don't do well, then our efforts, our materials, and the practitioners who have suffered persecution would all be in vain. By failing to follow Teacher's requirements, haven't we prevented human beings from being saved? Shouldn't our selfishness, pursuits and all other attachments be rectified and eliminated as well? Our one thought and impetus to act is related to whether sentient beings can be saved. If we don't realize our responsibility and don't rectify our words and actions, then we are unknowingly undermining Dafa's reputation and preventing sentient beings from being saved.
The above is my limited understanding. Fellow practitioners, please kindly point out anything that falls short.