(Clearwisdom.net)

May 8, 2003 by Dafa practitioner Liu Zhongshan

I started my happy days of studying the Fa and practicing the exercises in 1996, when I first learned about Falun Dafa. I am deeply grateful for Master Li's compassionate intent and for Dafa's profundity.

Because I did not understand the Fa well, however, and because of my many attachments and fears, after July 20^th 1999, my faith towards Dafa began to shake in front of the unprecedented pressure from the evil and their lies. With my human notions and human ways of analyzing things, I mistakenly doubted Master Li and Dafa, thus cooperating with the evil and doing something a Dafa practitioner should never do: I listened to the evil and wrote an article entitled "My understanding of Falun Gong" and two "guarantee" statements, all of which contained words slandering Dafa. I also handed them a Dafa book.

The worst thing I did was when the police told me not to practice, I really stopped practicing and completely turned into an everyday person. Sometimes, I even did things that were worse than everyday people. Because I was afraid, I did not have the courage to stand up and say something to defend Dafa! I completely went against my oath to validate the Fa and I completely let down the compassionate salvation of Master Li! When cultivating Dafa in the past, I had dreams that I climbed up the mountain with many practitioners. Even though it was very difficult, it was clear that I was elevating! After giving up cultivation and becoming an everyday person, however, I often dreamed about walking down a muddy river path. This was clearly a hint from Master Li telling me that I was degenerating! However, since I did something that a practitioner should never do, regret and sorrow tortured me deeply. Dafa is rectifying the entire cosmos and Master Li has given me something that is most precious. He has endured so much for me. When Master Li and Falun Dafa were being slandered and attacked, however, I did not have the courage to come out and give just a little bit. I was too ashamed to think about cultivation, so I dragged on anxiously.

Through the help of other practitioners--and more importantly--through repeated study of Teacher's new articles, I slowly and clearly recognized that no matter what reason one used to give up cultivation, this was cooperating with the evil. The moral standards of human society are sliding down rapidly every day. Turning back to become an everyday person is walking the path of destruction. If one goes against his will and "guarantees" something for them, one is actually following their path to hell and walking towards destruction! The only way to quickly turn around is to completely deny the arrangements of the old forces and return to a sacred cultivator's environment. Doing this, one will not miss tens of thousands of years' waiting. One will also be worthy of Master Li's painstaking and compassionate salvation. One has not let fellow practitioners down by risking their lives to clarify the truth to help! I would like to seriously declare that all my words and actions in the past that let Master Li down and made me not worthy of a Dafa practitioner are invalid! I will redouble my efforts to make up for the wrongdoings and to validate the Fa with great effort so I can completely clean up the stains and the humiliations in my life. I will truly achieve the level of being responsible for Dafa, for myself and for the portion of the cosmos that corresponds to me. I will be worthy the title "Dafa practitioner" and I will closely follow Master Li in the process of Fa rectification!

(Translated from an edited version of http://www.minghui.ca/mh/articles/2003/5/13/50191.html)

May 9, 2003 by Falun Dafa practitioner Wang Li

I have firmly believed in and validated Dafa since 1999. After the Chinese Government's Sixteenth Party Congress, however, due to political pressure, the leaders of my work unit sent me to a local brainwashing class. During the brainwashing class, I was guided into an evil path and wrote "Five Statements" (statements that denounce Dafa) because of my attachments. At that time I felt I was right. Later on, however, after experience sharing with other practitioners and sending forth righteous thoughts, I started to wake up. After all these years of witnessing Master Li's Fa, how could we stop believing in Dafa, our fellow practitioners, and even ourselves after just a few sentences from a so-called "Buddha researcher"? The fundamental reason is our attachments--wanting to get out of a difficult situation through some methods. As a result, we half willingly followed the evil's misguidance and shook the righteous thoughts and righteous beliefs.

After I returned to my work unit, the leaders asked me to declare my attitude in front of all my colleagues. Since I did not "criticize" Dafa the way they wanted, I was again threatened with the loss of my job. They asked me to write a "guarantee letter" and asked me to agree with their way of misinterpreting Dafa. In order to obtain temporary comfort, I made the mistake again. I couldn't forgive myself.

I have benefited greatly from Dafa and my family members have also obtained happiness and comfort from Dafa. I, however, sacrificed Dafa in order to protect myself when tribulations came. I was ashamed to face the salvation of Master Li and I was ashamed to face my fellow practitioners.

Master Li mentioned in "Explaining the Fa During the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference" that, "It doesn't matter that you fell down, it doesn't matter! Quickly get up!" Still, I always felt that I was not worthy of Master Li's salvation. After studying the Fa and sending forth righteous thoughts, I understood that the more I could not get up, the more satisfied the evil would be; Master Li will also be worried. Therefore, I need to break through the obstacles and finish my duty in the period of the Fa rectification and truly be responsible for myself and for Dafa. I will be a dignified Dafa practitioner. I declare that all the "Five Statements", and the "Guarantee Statement" that I wrote before are invalid. I will repair the damage I caused for Dafa.

(Translated from an edited version of http://www.minghui.ca/mh/articles/2003/5/15/50423.html)