(Minghui.org) Since obtaining the Fa in 1997, I have benefited tremendously from the practice. I still enjoy good health at 76 years old, and my moral character (xinxing) has improved steadily. Raising a big family with my non-practitioner husband, I’ve faced many challenges and tribulations over the past 20-plus years. However, I was able to overcome them by always focusing on striving to meet the principles of Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance. I’ve grown increasingly kind and tolerant by getting rid of my attachments, and I’m able to handle the ups and downs of family life with a calm heart.
My youngest son got married in 2010. Soon after the wedding, he tried to convince his wife to move to Beijing so he could pursue his dream of becoming an art teacher in the capital city. His wife’s opposition created a lot of friction between the two, and they often got into heated arguments. My son resented his wife for holding him back.
Fast forward five years and two kids later, my son decided he didn’t want to waste his prime years, and it was time to pursue his dreams. He made up his mind and moved to Beijing by himself in the spring of 2015, leaving his wife and two small children behind.
My daughter-in-law came to me one night that summer. She pulled up a picture on her cellphone and showed it to me—my son was with another woman, and they appeared to be intimate. I learned that the woman was a co-worker of his—another art teacher. As I was still in disbelief, my daughter-in-law declared that she was moving back to her parents’ house. Her brother came to pick her up that night, and she left with both kids.
I looked inward to see where I had failed so miserably in raising my son and how it led to his having an affair. I visited my daughter-in-law at her parents’ house the next day and apologized to her parents, “I didn’t raise my son well. It’s all my fault. I am so sorry.” However, I couldn’t change what happened—all I could do was to hold myself to the principles of Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance.
I’m a Falun Dafa practitioner in the Fa-rectification period. Besides cultivating myself diligently and doing the three things well, I also need to balance my family relations. I decided to help my daughter-in-law as much as I could and give her all of my support. Each day, I went out to clarify the truth in the morning, then picked up my grandchildren from school in the afternoon. I babysat them, cooked dinner, and dropped them off when my daughter-in-law got off work.
I also bought them new clothes and provided them with snacks and toys whenever I could. This lasted for a year and a half before my son moved back home.
My husband’s middle brother was my son’s favorite uncle growing up. When he visited us for the 2016 new year, I wanted to ask him to talk to my son and convince him to work things out with his wife, but I was embarrassed and didn’t know where to start. Before his stay was about to end, my husband’s youngest brother urged me, “Sis, what are you waiting for? My brother’s leaving soon. Ask him to talk to your son so he can keep the family together.” Hesitantly, I approached my brother-in-law for help, and he agreed.
After a heart-to-heart chat with his uncle, my son decided to mend things with his wife. The couple worked things out, and my daughter-in-law and grandchildren moved back home. The neighbors watched with great interest as our family drama unfolded—seeing how I’d handled the crisis and knowing how much I’d sacrificed, they gave me a big thumbs-up. I am filled with gratitude toward Master—it was Dafa’s teachings that guided me to treat everyone involved with kindness.
During a routine check-up in the spring of 2019, my middle son’s wife was diagnosed with a uterine tumor and underwent surgery to have it removed. Later that year, she was diagnosed with another tumor in her lung. The expenses were huge, and my son was upset about his wife having two surgeries back to back. I didn’t know anything about it, as my daughter-in-law didn’t want to worry me. So she turned to her parents for support as the conflicts between her and my son escalated.
My in-laws showed up one day and told me, “Your son and our daughter are always fighting. We’ve had enough. Our daughter is coming home with us today, and we will take care of her.” Before I could wrap my head around what just happened, they began loading the car with her belongings. Before leaving, my daughter-in-law’s father said, “We’re filing for a divorce at the county clerk’s office tomorrow.” My son, being stubborn, responded coldly, “I’ll be there!”
My son complained about his wife and her family after they left. I said, “My son, you’ll have ill-fortune.” He was confused, “How so?”
“When a person commits a bad deed, physical suffering is nothing compared to the pain he has to bear on his soul, which is his real self, and he will have to suffer the consequences.”
My daughter-in-law’s mother called and said my daughter-in-law was scheduled for surgery the next day. She asked for our help paying for the expenses. We visited them that evening. As we chatted, my daughter-in-law’s mother started crying—she was worried about her daughter’s health. After coming home, I told my son that he was going to visit and help take care of his wife at the hospital.
The cost of the surgery was to be paid in full before the operation. Knowing my in-laws’ circumstances, I couldn’t let them pay for it. My daughter-in-law married my son and is a member of our family—we were going to take care of her. We would cover her medical expenses in full. Since I’m a practitioner, I came to this world to help Master rectify the Fa and save sentient beings. If I don’t do well taking care of my family affairs, how would our family, friends, and neighbors be able to see the goodness of Dafa?
Before my daughter-in-law’s surgery the next day, my husband and I recited “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good” for 20 minutes. Waiting outside the operating room, I continued to recite these auspicious phrases until the doctor finally came out. He showed us a sample of my daughter-in-law’s lung tissue and said, “Look. The tissue is smooth and healthy. There is nothing!” My husband and I exchanged a look and knew that compassionate Master must have removed the tumor.
My in-laws and their relatives also witnessed the power of Dafa. I told my daughter-in-law’s mother, “You really should thank Master.” She nodded, “Thanks to Master Li!”
My daughter-in-law’s latest round of tests confirmed she was healthy, and the doctor exclaimed, “Her lungs are clear. She can go home anytime!” The day she was discharged, her mother told us, “I think it’s better for her to come home and stay with us while your son figures out what he wants to do.”
I visited my daughter-in-law at her parents’ house as she recovered. Her grandmother saw me one time and said, “When my granddaughter is better, maybe your son can apologize and work things out with her. I would love for her to go home to your family. You are such a good mother-in-law to her.”
I couldn’t have handled the crisis so well if it weren’t for Dafa’s teachings and Master’s guidance. I clarified the truth about Dafa to my daughter-in-law’s grandmother and told her to recite “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good” as it would bring blessings. After my daughter-in-law recovered, my son apologized and brought her home. The two of them now have a wonderful marriage. I also received reimbursement from the health insurance company for my daughter-in-law’s medical expenses.
Since Master’s new article “How Humankind Came To Be” was published on January 20, 2023, I have been wanting to find a good time to give my son a copy. While working together in the garden one day, my son opened up to me and talked about people whom he had met recently and how the experience disappointed him. He sighed and commented on how the morality of society is in rapid decline. I thought, “This is my opportunity!” So I took out a copy of the article and gave it to him to read.
I explained: “Since the creation of this world, nobody has ever been able to explain why humankind exists. Please read this article carefully. Master has revealed a lot of heavenly secrets in it.” I then stood nearby and sent forth righteous thoughts while he read. When he was done, he looked up and asked, “What should I do?” I knew he was referring to the many mistakes he’d made in the past. I told him, “Change your ways!”
And he did. He tries to be a better husband to his wife, a better father, and has learned to take care of them. Our family members are also sentient beings. Regardless of where we are, we need to maintain a heart of compassion so the people around us will see the goodness of Dafa and obtain salvation. I am forever grateful to Master for blessing me with a harmonious family.
Whenever the neighbors mention my family, they always say to each other, “Look at that family,” using us as an example of what they should strive to be. I clarified the truth to my neighbors and told them how wonderful Dafa is. They replied, “We have already seen it in everything you do!”
My husband was not feeling well in June 2023. At first, he thought he was coming down with the flu, but the symptoms persisted even after IV fluids were administered. The doctor suggested an X-ray, which confirmed he had pneumonia. He was admitted to the county hospital that very day. While there, he suffered a stroke and, a few days later, was diagnosed with diabetes.
After being discharged from the hospital, many of our relatives came to visit my husband. My brother told him, “Diabetes is a disease of the wealthy. It means you’ve had a comfortable life and have been eating well.” My brother’s words made me realize my husband’s poor health was caused by his many bad habits. I couldn’t help but scold my husband in front of our guests. Without holding back, I let my frustration and resentment out, counting his stubborn habits and complaining about how much I’ve had to endure and suffer in our 48 years of marriage.
When my son and my sister-in-law hinted that I should stop berating my husband in front of our guests, I even felt wronged, “It’s been going on for years. I’ve never complained about him. Which one of you has heard me criticize him?”
I only realized what I had done after our guests left. I regretted being such a poor representation of a Dafa practitioner. I didn’t hold myself to the standards of the Fa, and my behavior was unacceptable. I reminded myself: “I’m here to unconditionally assimilate to and validate the universal principle of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance—how could I still harbor such resentment for my husband? I have not cultivated myself well!”
My siblings asked my youngest sister to talk to me, “Why don’t you talk to her? Our brother-in-law is so sick, yet she’s got nothing but anger toward him. We give up!” My youngest sister came to me, “We can’t hold onto resentment, Sis, it’s time to let it go.” Upon hearing this from my own sister, I knew I had to get rid of this attachment.
I worked on it and tried to do better, but my resentment still flared up every so often. Each time it did, I recited Master’s Fa,
“Our task is to abide by goodness without complaint ...” (“Dispelling Your Confusion,” Hong Yin IV)
Another complaint I had was my husband’s wastefulness. He used to be a chef in the military. After being discharged from the military, he told me, “I love cooking and I’ll take care of the cooking part from now on.”
He channeled his passion for food and cooking into making these elaborate meals for the family. He’s good at what he does, and we love the food he makes. But we didn’t need multiple dishes for every single meal. Some of the dishes were never touched, so we had tons of leftovers that nobody ate. We’ve wasted so much food over the years. When I made the right amount of food for the number of people eating, however, he expressed his displeasure by accusing me of being stingy.
I didn’t understand why he cooked so much more food than was needed, and it all went to waste. I tried numerous times to talk to him, but he didn’t listen. My resentment grew stronger, and it was hard to chip it away. But this time, I made up my mind to completely let it go.
Master’s new articles, “The Ordeals Our Spiritual Discipline Faces” and “A Wake-Up Call” were published in June 2024. I reflected on my course of cultivation and realized I needed to tackle my resentment. I strove to have more compassion toward my husband and get rid of my resentment. Now, whenever he does something that bothers me, I tell myself, “I have to listen to Master and be compassionate toward everybody.” Right away, my disdain vanishes.
I will cultivate as if I’ve just obtained the Fa and strive forward vigorously to return to my heavenly home with Master.