(Minghui.org) I’m in my 60s and grew up in a restricted family environment. My father had a bad temper and we never dared express our thoughts. My mother, afraid we would make mistakes, controlled us in extreme ways. She didn’t let us interact with others and wanted us to stay in her sight at all times. Growing up like this made me poor at communicating with others and I was bad at handling relationships. Even as an adult I had almost no friends.

After I started working people often bullied me or looked down on me. I had no one to talk to, so I kept everything inside. I often felt miserable and wronged. My long-term depression caused physical problems. My mind was foggy, and I had no strength. After I got up each morning and folded my quilt I had to lie down and rest for a while before I had enough energy to wash my face.

Everything changed when I encountered Falun Dafa. I saw a group of people doing the exercises one day. Someone said, “They are practicing Falun Dafa and it works wonders for improving health.” The moment I heard this I felt delighted. I joined them and began practicing Falun Dafa.

I studied the Fa and did the exercises with the group every day. When evening practice overlapped with dinnertime, I preferred to skip dinner rather than miss doing the exercises. Soon after I started practicing Falun Dafa, my health improved greatly, and my mood became lighter. I felt a happiness I had never experienced before.

Such a wonderful practice, I wanted my family to learn it too so they could benefit as well. I enthusiastically told a relative about the goodness of Falun Dafa, about my physical condition before and after I began practicing, and how practitioners live by the principles of ‘Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance’. He not only refused to listen, but he mocked me, saying I was neither truthful nor kind. I was shocked. I never imagined this was the image I presented to others. I always thought I behaved well!

This incident hit me hard and helped me see my shortcomings. I realized I had strong selfish attachments and always evaluated situations from the perspective of my own loss and gain. I did not truly cultivate myself according to Dafa’s standards. I claimed that I was good, but the way I behaved caused my family to have negative opinions of Falun Dafa.

I calmed my mind and carefully read and memorized Master’s teachings. I reminded myself to follow Master’s words, remove my attachments, elevate myself, and become a true practitioner.

As soon as I had the thought of improving myself, tests followed. One day, while having dinner with my husband, I complained about my mother-in-law. He suddenly got angry and slapped me. I was stunned. He had been smiling just moments earlier—why did he hit me? I thought, “What kind of person are you? You turn hostile faster than flipping a page.” I started cursing in my mind, but I held back my words and went to my room. The pain on my face made me feel indignant and upset.

I remembered what Master said,

“If when you encounter any trouble you can manage to look inside yourself and find your own attachments, then that is precisely cultivation.” (“Teachings at the Conference in New Zealand”)

Master was telling me to look inward. I immediately searched within. It was my fault, as I said hurtful words and didn’t consider my husband’s feelings. After I realized this I no longer felt upset and I let go of my resentment.

The next morning, I made breakfast as usual before my husband left for work. When he saw the milk and eggs on the table, he was shocked. He thought I was still angry about being hit and I would refuse to prepare his breakfast. In the past, I definitely wouldn’t have made breakfast for him, and would instead start a “cold war.” But now, I could let go of my pride, look inward, and measure myself with Dafa’s teachings. After I looked within and improved myself, my husband felt I had changed, and our relationship became harmonious.

When I had conflicts with everyday people I reminded myself to cultivate. But when disagreements or misunderstandings happened with fellow practitioners, I couldn’t easily look within and instead thought the other person was wrong. One winter day, a practitioner asked me to meet her and asked what time I could arrive. I told her I could be there in half an hour. But I ran a small errand on the way, which delayed me, and then I received her message telling me not to come.

Since I didn’t know what she needed from me, I went to her home that afternoon to check on her. When she saw me, she was very upset and scolded me sharply: “You didn’t come at the time you promised. Who do you think you are?! It’s freezing outside, and an elderly practitioner was waiting with me.” Seeing her emotional state and hearing her complaints, I didn’t argue.

But when I got home, thinking about her sharp words and cold expression made me feel wronged and upset. I thought, “We are both practitioners. If I just explained why I was late, she would know I didn’t do it on purpose and would forgive me. Even if she didn’t understand me, she didn’t need to get that angry. I never thought she would yell at me like that. Is she cultivating?!” At that moment, all I could see were her flaws. In my eyes everything was her fault.

That evening, I felt I should calm down and reexamine what happened. The practitioner’s attitude wasn’t good, but what she said was true. It was indeed cold that day, and an elderly practitioner was waiting with her. It was my poor time management that caused them to wait. She was right to point out my mistake. Yet I was still complaining about her attitude and behavior. How strong my selfishness was! How poorly I cultivated!

I wish to sincerely apologize to that practitioner: I’m sorry, please forgive me! Guided by Dafa’s teachings, I will become more peaceful, rational, and continue to correct myself step by step.