(Minghui.org) As a Falun Dafa practitioner, I know I need to constantly improve myself according to the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. But it has not been easy.
Living in a society with all kinds of temptations, I was often distracted by what I saw or heard, and I was also influenced by what others did. As a result, sometimes I slacked off.
For a while, I stopped group study with other practitioners and the situation got worse. I failed to pass many tribulations and sometimes I knew something was wrong but chose to do it anyway.
One day I had a dream in which Master Li, the founder of Falun Dafa, emerged from the book Zhuan Falunand said to me seriously, “Kneel down.” Waking up from the dream, I looked within to see what I had done wrong. Instead of following the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance and cultivating diligently, I often acted like an everyday person. In fact, there were times when I was worse than an everyday person.
So what caused this? When I first started practicing Falun Dafa, I was able to study the Fa with a pure mind. Later on, I developed attachments and always wanted to understand more higher-level things in the Dafa books. This was not what Master asked us to do. In fact, those thoughts of mine were from human notions, not my true self. That is, when studying Dafa teachings, I should study with a humble heart, without any impure thoughts.
I have developed many notions from the past and they are very stubborn. For example, I knew how to handle things at work without thinking, but I forgot to measure whether handling things my way met the requirements for a Dafa practitioner. I realized later that I should always remind myself to handle things as a practitioner and treat others with compassion.
Similar things also apply to other circumstances, not just the workplace. In my mind, I knew I should have righteous thoughts and righteous actions, but I often failed to do so when it came to specific matters. It was as if I was attached to my way of doing things and did not want to step out of my comfort zone of being an everyday person. I found this happened because my determination to meet Dafa’s requirements was not strong enough. By handling things my way, however, many sentient beings may have missed their opportunities to be saved because of my failure to meet Dafa's requirements.
As I am writing this article, I recognize that I still have many attachments such as pursuit of comfort, fear, anger, selfishness, and so on. I will keep working hard to eliminate those human notions, and I am confident I’ll succeed in doing so by continued study of the teachings. This is a process for my true self to be assimilated to Dafa while letting go of human notions.
Editor's note: This article only represents the author’s current understanding meant for sharing among practitioners so that we can “Compare with one another in study, in cultivation.” (“Solid Cultivation,” Hong Yin)