(Minghui.org) I am a young Falun Dafa practitioner from Tianjin. Because of the pandemic, I could not go to work for two months. I was able to focus on studying and memorizing the Fa and sending forth righteous thoughts. I truly understood what true cultivation is and the urgency of saving people. I would like to share my experiences with you.
During the time I stayed at home I was able to do the three things well. I woke up at 3:20 a.m. every morning and finished practicing the exercises at 5:50 a.m. I memorized and recited poems from Hong Yin V. I ate breakfast while listening to fellow practitioners’ cultivation experiences. I memorized Zhuan Falun and wrote it down from memory. I also made truth-clarifying phone calls. I was in a very good cultivation state.
When I found out how serious the pandemic was and that so many people were dying, I felt the urgency of saving people. I felt really remorseful for not doing well in the past. During that period of time, the environment in my house also became harmonious. Master [Master Li Hongzhi, the founder of Falun Dafa] encouraged me and showed me in a dream that I successfully passed through a gap, the width of a thread, between two closed gates. He made the impossible become possible. I understood that Master is the one doing everything.
After I went back to work, the time I had to study the Fa was reduced. It seemed like each time I picked up Zhuan Falun the phone rang. One phone call could last for about an hour. Afterwards, I remembered that I had other things to do. By the time I finished doing everything, I felt very tired and said I would wake up early and read the Fa tomorrow. However, I was not be able to get up and practice the morning exercises on time. I soon began slacking off and was not cultivating diligently. I no longer looked within when I met with problems, and thus, trouble and tribulations ensued.
At work, my workload increased and the entire accounting department was placed under my charge. I felt that I was promoted and as a result, my attachments of self-satisfaction and arrogance grew. I was aloof towards my colleagues and also did not treat my superiors with a humble attitude. In the end, many conflicts occurred. Facing my co-workers’ unfriendly attitude, I started to look for my problems: I had become arrogant, I thought that I was always right, and I showed off. I did not think from others’ perspective. When I identified my problems I wanted to change. However, I still could not eliminate my grudges when I recalled my boss’s attitude.
During this period of time, my younger brother called me frequently as he often had conflicts with his wife. His wife lied to him and they did not trust each other. Even though my family spent a lot of effort and money on her, she was not grateful. She had no respect for my mother and even told her friends and relatives about our family conflicts. I got angry whenever she was mentioned and I totally forgot that I was a practitioner.
Abnormalities started to show up on my body and I developed hives. When I was writing down the Fa from memory I made many mistakes. The Internet speed was especially slow when I opened Minghui.org. I fell asleep when I meditated or sent righteous thoughts. All these conditions made me realize that I was in a bad cultivation state and that I needed to cultivate diligently.
I started off with studying the Fa. When I was waiting for the bus in the morning, I memorized Hong Yin V. When I was on the bus, I studied Master’s teachings given around the world. If I felt drowsy, I memorized the Fa. During lunch break, I memorized Zhuan Falun. After dinner, I started to memorize the Fa and write the Fa out from memory. I also sent forth righteous thoughts every hour. During the weekends, apart from calling my family, I made good use of the available time to memorize the Fa and send forth righteous thoughts every hour. After persisting this way, I enlightened to many Fa principles. I also started to really look within when I met with problems.
I did not eliminate the grudges I had about my boss because I still had some opinions about her. When I took over the position from a colleague who’d quit, she told me many bad things about this boss: she made a spare copy of the keys to all the drawers that this colleague was in charge of. One time, she noticed that her personal belongings had been shifted. When I was in urgent need of a thumb drive, this boss unlocked a drawer and took out a thumb drive, proving that this colleague was right. After the handover I carried my important personal belongings with me everywhere I went. This suspicious mindset changed my view of my superior.
I kept looking within and realized that the cause of my grudge was my suspicious mindset. I have many opinions and imagine every possible outcome, thus I’m always filled with worry and suspicion. A cultivator’s every thought must be based on the Fa. Now, when my “suspicions” surface, I quickly identify them and tell myself to stop.
When the superior delegated jobs again, I cooperated with a friendly attitude. The superior also changed her attitude towards me.
When my younger brother calls me to help resolve his conflicts, I usually reason it out with him based on my life experiences and understandings. I guide him to solve his own problems so that he can change himself and the problem can be resolved. Later, I remembered that I am a cultivator so I should look at myself based on the problems that I see in him.
“If you're just cultivating with your mind focused on solving that problem, then you're not truly cultivating. Cultivation has to be completely unconditional.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2004 Western U.S. Fa Conference,”Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. V)
I guided my brother based on Dafa’s principles: look for problems within ourselves first and change ourselves first. I also examined myself to see why I witnessed my brother’s problems. I told myself to remember “Do not be moved.”
“Could a divine being be swayed by all kinds of human attachments? Not a chance, of course it's impossible.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2004 Western U.S. Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. V)
I thought that my sister-in-law’s behavior was very selfish and she only thought about herself. I looked within to see if I was selfish. I found that I made everyone around me agree with my opinion. If anyone disagreed with me I felt unsettled. I often point out others’ problems, thinking that my understanding is correct. I realized that everyone has their own thoughts, so we cannot insist that others do what we want.
I also felt that my sister-in-law placed great emphasis on material gain. So, looking inward, I found that I still pursue personal gain.
I also have the desire for returns. I spent a lot of effort and money on her children but she did not reciprocate. When I did not feel happy about it I found my attachment to the desire for returns.
After finding all these attachments, the grudges that I had against my sister-in-law gradually disappeared. Before long, the conflicts between my brother and his wife quickly disappeared too.
Because I’m a practitioner, everything that happens around me is related to me. I must look within all the time. I have too many human attachments, and not getting rid of any one of them will slow down my cultivation.
In 2017, I met my boss’s friend. He is suave and handsome, and I began having feelings for him. I realized this was wrong. I tried to curb my feelings and not think about him. After a while, he no longer came to the company. When his image popped up in my mind I sent righteous thoughts to stop thinking about him. After some time, my memories of him gradually faded but I still occasionally remembered him.
One day, I suddenly thought of him and I did not stop this thought. The next morning my legs were covered in hives. My legs were so itchy that I had trouble meditating. After sending righteous thoughts for a long time, the hives disappeared the next day. Since then, whenever thoughts of lust appear in my mind, hives appear on my legs. This still happens, so I want to expose this attachment.
“So as a cultivator, what is truly remarkable is when you can be steadfast and have righteous thoughts so firm that nothing can sway you. Be solid and firm like diamond, or granite, and then nothing can affect you--evil will be afraid at the mere sight of you. If upon encountering trying circumstances your thinking can be truly righteous, then, when faced with the evil's persecution and when faced with interference, just one sentence of yours fortified with steadfast righteous thoughts can instantly make the evil disintegrate (applause), and it will make those who are being used by the evil turn and flee, it will make the evil's persecution of you dissolve, and it will make the evil's interfering with you disappear without a trace. One thought born of righteous faith is all it takes. And whoever can hold firm that righteous thought and go the distance will become a magnificent god forged by Dafa.” (“Teaching the Fa at the Western U.S. International Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. VII)
I recently began getting drowsy when I meditated or sent forth righteous thoughts. I have a very strong desire to comfort. Every day after work I feel like taking a nap. By the time I wake up it’s too late to do anything. I provided a rich environment for my attachment to comfort. Initially, it affected my Fa study and sending righteous thoughts at midnight. Later, it began to affect my morning exercises and Fa study. It caused me to be separated from Dafa and resulted in serious interference.
The desire for comfort is a very strong attachment. Whenever I feel tired, I tell myself, “I am not tired. Nothing can disturb my Fa study and cultivation.”
“You walk this path of Fa-rectification well, you manage to overcome your limitations in cultivation, you let go of your attachments, you save all beings with righteous thoughts in your mind, and you handle everything you face with righteous thoughts--that is mighty virtue.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2003 Atlanta Fa Conference,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IV)
When I become sleepy while studying the Fa, I stand or walk while reading or change to memorizing and writing out the Fa from memory. If I can maintain righteous thoughts all the time I will be able to be free from human notions and truly cultivate.
Through increasing my Fa study time and looking within, my state started to change: When I am memorizing the Fa, I can calm down my thoughts and make fewer mistakes when I write out the Fa from memory. I am able to quiet my thoughts when I send righteous thoughts. I still need to continue improving myself.
I understood that everything that happens around a cultivator is provoking our attachments. When we are able to look within and change ourselves, our environment will change. I still have too many attachments and Master has given me many hints to enlighten me. Thank you, Master, for your benevolence.
In the past, I often thought that if I did not get enough sleep I wouldn’t be able to wake up on time to do the morning exercises. Therefore, I went to bed around 10:30 p.m. every night. One night I stayed up longer to study the Fa, and I went to bed after sending righteous thoughts at midnight. When the alarm clock rang at 3:30 a.m. the next morning I did not feel sleepy. This incident made me understand that a cultivator’s every thought must be based on the Fa. “Feeling sleepy due to a lack of sleep,” is a human notion that I need to eliminate. Only by studying the Fa well will I be able to attain a cultivation state that is up to the standard.
I once dreamed that a person was hanging from a third-floor window, waiting for me to bring him in. I was on the second floor and there were no stairs for me to go upstairs to save him. I understood from this dream that I had not cultivated myself well enough to reach that level to save sentient beings. As a practitioner, the three things that we need to do are closely linked to each other. At this last moment in history, I must make good use of every second to study the Fa well so I can maintain righteous thoughts all the time. Only in this way will I be able to truly improve in my cultivation based on the Fa and thus truly be able to save sentient beings.
The reason why we are able to become Dafa disciples to assist Master in the rectification of the Fa is because Master chose us and gave us this glory. Therefore, we must believe in Master and the Fa and do well in every step of our cultivation. We must be very diligent in our cultivation!