(Minghui.org) I have recently been paying more attention to looking inward and cultivating myself. As a result my attachments are removed faster and I am improving more quickly in cultivation.
I used to sneeze and have a runny nose and sore throat, like the symptoms of a cold, every fall. This usually lasted about a month and had been like this for several years.
I had these symptoms again recently but they were much worse than before. My nose kept running, I sneezed constantly, and I couldn't sleep because of a sore throat. It hurt to swallow, like a knife cutting my throat, and it was difficult to breathe.
When it happened in previous years, it was uncomfortable but I was still able to sleep. I never looked inward and didn’t realize that this was a good thing that could help me improve my xinxing and eliminate my karma. Sometimes I even thought it was interference from the old forces, other times human notions came up and I wondered if it was an allergy or a cold.
Master has repeatedly given me opportunities to improve myself, but I didn’t understand them.
Master said,
“If a Dafa disciple meets with some ordeal or karma shedding, there is surely a reason behind it, and he should try to find the problem on his part. And for sure, after he finds the cause and immediately does well in that regard, things will change for the better, in a positive direction, right away.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2019 New York Fa Conference,” Translation Yellow Team)
I understood that I should calm down and look inward.
I found a lot of human notions, such as sentimentality for my family, an attachment to self, and fear. My throat was still sore and uncomfortable. I continued to look inward and remembered the time I went out to buy crabs with my husband. I picked out four live ones. I knew that I wasn't the one who would cook them, so I thought it was all right to choose them.
My husband bought some clams shortly after I had just started practicing Falun Dafa. I dreamed one night that when I was frying the clams in the pot, they changed into human feet. I realized that it was killing lives. My husband then stopped buying clams.
I have been practicing Falun Dafa for over 20 years. How could I have made such a mistake like being involved in killing lives? I really felt regret. I continued to look inward deeply. I realized that I treated the symptoms of illness as an ordinary person. I immediately denied this thought and rejected it. I sat up and started to recite Master’s Fa:
“During the Fa-rectification of the cosmos, I can make a reasonable arrangement for those of you who don't interfere with my validating the Fa; I can have you become beings in the future. Those of you who seek a benevolent resolution should leave me and wait in my surroundings. If you really cannot leave me, then don't have any part in interfering with me. In the future I will be able to achieve Consummation, and I will offer you a benevolent resolution. Those who are completely bad, who still interfere with me and who cannot remain will, according to the standards, have to be eliminated. Even if I don't eliminate you, the Law of the cosmos won't let you remain.” (Teaching the Fa at the 2004 International Fa Conference in New York)
I kept reciting until I didn’t feel pain anymore. I lay down and slept until dawn. The next day, my runny nose, sneezing, and sore throat had completely disappeared. It would have taken at least a month for the symptoms to be gone in the past. Looking inward is really a magical weapon.
Through this incident, I also realized the seriousness of cultivation. As a cultivator, every thought and action should be based on the Fa, so the old forces cannot take advantage of our loopholes.
I listened to a practitioner's sharing article on Minghui Radio today. It was written by a practitioner outside of China who recently started to work for a website. One day after her husband, a non-practitioner, read an article on this website, he got furious and insisted that she stop working for the website. If she didn't, he would divorce her. He also said something disrespectful about Dafa. The practitioner was puzzled because her husband had never been like this before. She tried to talk to him several times, but things didn’t get any better, which really distressed her.
She started to look inward and found the fundamental attachment—the reason she was studying Dafa was to have a happy family and a better life. After finding this fundamental attachment, her husband changed. The practitioner realized that practicing Dafa with no pursuits will naturally lead to true happiness and joy.
After listening to the article, I realized that my fundamental attachment was the same as hers. I understand now why, even though I have contributed so much to my family, there were still many conflicts.
Master said,
“Still, some people seek to open the celestial eye. The more they practice for this, the more unlikely it is to open. What’s the reason? They have no idea themselves. It is mainly because the celestial eye cannot be pursued: The more one desires, the less one obtains. When a person wants it desperately, not only will it not open, but instead something neither black nor white will emit from his celestial eye. It will cover up his celestial eye.” (Lecture Two, Zhuan Falun)
I understood that the more I want, the less I will have. Moreover, what I ask for is something ordinary people want. A true cultivator wants to return to their true self and get rid of all ordinary people’s attachments. Just wanting from Dafa but not giving. What a filthy thought!
I fell down twice in the bathroom yesterday. It was the first time that had happened since we moved here several years ago. I knew that nothing that happens to a practitioner is accidental, so asked myself why I'd fallen but couldn't figure it out. Was it because I was browsing on my cellphone the day before or was it due to sentimentality for my grandson?”
When I got up this morning, I recalled the dream I'd had. Two little girls kept running around me so I couldn't move. They kept getting taller as they ran and ran.
Master’s Fa came to my mind,
“Some people say that recreational drug use is no big deal and that it seems harmless. And sure, people feel pretty good when they try it. What if they do it again? There’s no apparent problem. How about one more time? Then their self-control starts to erode. But why is that? When that substance is inhaled, inside of your body it forms a very thin and light version of you. One hit is all it takes, since it’s highly poisonous.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2019 New York Fa Conference,” Translation Yellow Team)
I realized it was a hint from Master. Each time I browsed on my cell phone, I wasted 20 minutes. The two little girls were manifestations of the bad substances from the cell phone, and they became alive in my mind.
I was shocked and realized that I'd nourished the demons, as they want to control me.
Master is always watching over us and guiding us. We should cultivate diligently, do the three things well, reach Consummation, and follow Master to our true home.