(Minghui.org) Master said,
“As true cultivators of Falun Dafa, when you can give up your attachments, all of you will have reactions from this point on. Those who cannot give up their attachments may claim that they have released them, but in fact they are not able to give them up at all. It is thus very difficult to achieve.” (Lecture Two, Zhuan Falun)
To make a living, I chose a high-paying job that is physically demanding and consumes a lot of my energy. I eventually slacked off in cultivation, and my human notions emerged as a result.
When the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) virus pandemic hit China in the beginning of the year, no one was prepared for its severity. The local practitioners used various methods to awaken the conscience of sentient beings when the towns, villages, and roads were blocked off. Yet, I stayed at home like an ordinary person.
It is common for me to have irregular periods. I had one that lasted 15 days in the beginning of January 2020. I was scared and worried. I couldn’t eat or sleep well.
I then realized that my purpose in life was to awaken the conscience of sentient beings, so I went to my sisters’ homes to tell them about Falun Dafa and the persecution. They all agreed that Dafa is good.
When I returned home, I realized that I only had a thin layer of pants on, but I felt hot and sweaty. I later thought about my health condition. I had all kinds of human notions. Many questions ran through my mind, “Is it a uterine fibroid? A tumor that broke down? Or is it because the contraceptive ring isn’t working? Otherwise, how come there was so much blood? Could it be endometritis?”
I even thought of calling someone to ask about her symptoms in order to compare them with mine so that I could better prepare myself. When a practitioner said she didn’t feel well, I wanted to inquire about her situation and whether our symptoms were similar.
I later studied the Fa with another practitioner. Master said,
“By going there to listen, weren’t you seeking something? If you did not listen with your ears, how could it get into your body?” (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun)
I enlightened that it was a hint from Master. I didn’t have righteous thoughts but only human notions. I had a strong attachment to fear and wanted to use human methods to solve my problem. Only when I do everything according to the Fa am I considered a Dafa practitioner, after all.
I started to look within at home. What caused my problems? Was it because I was worried about developing diseases? Then Master’s Fa appeared in my mind:
“Can’t you even get over this trivial thing? Everyone can make it. So, do not come to me for healing illnesses anymore as I will not treat illness. Once you bring up the word “illness,” I won’t want to listen.” (Lecture Two, Zhuan Falun).
I was too attached to the thought of sickness karma. Master said,
“We emphasize one point: If you cannot relinquish the attachment or concern for illness, we cannot do anything and will be unable to help you.” (Lecture One, Zhuan Falun).
As I continued to look inward, I found many human attachments. When I was about to send forth righteous thoughts, I suddenly thought of what Master had said, to “relinquish.” Immediately, I felt a clear stream flowing downward from my abdomen, and the bleeding stopped. I slept well that night.