(Minghui.org) My life was spiraling downward before I started practicing Falun Dafa in 1997. It was Falun Dafa that gave me hope, made me realize the value of life, and guided me on the road back to my true self.
The ten years I was schooled as a child happened during the Cultural Revolution. It was an era when the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) advocated “the more knowledge one gains, the more reactionary one is.” My life was full of criticizing meetings and not accepting what was published in the newspapers. I didn't receive any cultural lessons, nor did I learn about traditional culture because it was also criticized. Only Party culture was instilled in my mind.
It is impossible to form a correct outlook on life and the world in the social environment created and controlled by the CCP. I became extremely selfish, thinking and doing everything for myself, but not for others. After I was married, I couldn’t live in harmony with members of the family. As a result, my marriage failed and I ran into obstacles in other aspects of my life.
I did some reflecting on my life after the divorce. I felt like I didn’t have a spiritual pillar and my life was empty; like I was a headless fly flitting around bumping into things. I wondered about the purpose of life, and how I would spend the rest of my life. Time is like an arrow and life is so short.
Gradually I realized that I needed a faith to rely on. When I visited a temple as a tourist, I always felt a sense of tranquility and comfort, and I wanted to stay there and leave the modern world. But on the other hand, I still liked the fun aspects of a worldly person's life. I thought if I could believe in Buddha at home, that would work for me.
Maybe Master Li (Dafa's founder) saw my kindness and gave me the opportunity to practice it. A Falun Dafa practitioner recommended the practice to me and lent me a copy of the book Zhuan Falun. I took it home and read it earnestly. The more I read, the more excited I became; the longer I read, the more principles I gained.
Master elaborated on the constant truth that exists in the universe—Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. I had suddenly found the meaning of life, i.e. returning to my origin. I was beyond excited. Zhuan Falun answered all my questions, so I decided to become a Falun Dafa practitioner.
I started practicing the exercises every morning and read Zhuan Falun and Master Li's other scriptures whenever I had time. Without trying, my body became stronger day by day. Catching colds was common for me in the past. After practicing Falun Dafa, I almost never had a cold.
I used to have serious insomnia and I could only sleep for two or three hours a night. When I got up in the morning I felt burned out. After practicing Falun Dafa I slept more, had more energy, and I found walking got easier.
The most important thing to me is that my worldview on everything changed after learning the true meaning of life. I became more positive and used the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance to guide my behavior and be considerate of others when encountering difficulties. I no longer thought only about my personal interests.
For example, the shuttle bus at work is overcrowded every day. There are always a few people who have to stand for nearly an hour while the bus travels over 13 miles. I got on the bus at the departure station, so I always had a seat. I thought that as a cultivator I should follow Master's words,
“...Let joy be found in hardship.”(“Tempering the Will”, Hong Yin, Translation Version A)
So I gave my seat to others when the bus filled up. Eventually, the traffic management department was told they couldn't overcrowd the bus. After that, there was no need to give my seat away.
“Every aspect of xinxing must be upgraded for you to make real progress. This is a crucial factor in improving gong potency (gongli).” (Lecture One, Zhuan Falun)
In the context of moral collapse in mainland China, everyone is polluted and I am no exception; I also have a lot of unhealthy thinking. During cultivation, I began to demand that I would live by higher standards and try to do better. Still, I often encountered different tests.
Before I began cultivation, I attended my 20th anniversary high school graduation reunion. Some of my classmates rebuilt previous connections. After I started practicing, a female classmate called me from time to time to chat. She even visited me one night and found some excuse to sleep at my house. I told her I was practicing Falun Dafa to become a good person.
Late at night, she came to my room and wanted to have sex with me. I told her seriously that I had faith, and I wouldn’t do anything that went against the moral standards I follow; Falun Dafa is a righteous practice, not a fake belief; I would do what I said. I closed my eyes and ignored her. The next morning, she left with tears.
One day I bought two semi-automatic water heaters, one for my parents and one for myself. I took them home, opened the boxes, and found they were both fully automatic heaters that usually cost more than 600 yuan. If this had happened before, I would have just kept the heaters. Now that I practice Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance, I have to think about others. If the sales clerk mistakenly sold high-priced goods for a lower price, she would have to repay the difference, and I couldn’t let that happen.
The next day, I took the heaters back to the store. The sales clerk was confused until I explained to her what happened. She exchanged them for two of the low-priced water heaters. I said that she was lucky I am a Falun Dafa practitioner; otherwise, she would have lost money.
Not long ago, I talked to a deputy director about Falun Dafa. He said that he didn't understand why I wouldn't accept the bonus given to my work unit. I explained that part of the money had been collected forcefully from a lower level company, which made it dirty money. As a Falun Dafa practitioner, of course I wouldn’t take such money. I had to correct all bad thoughts and actions, and purify myself to gradually reach a higher level. I let him watch a video about Falun Dafa and he accepted the truth of the practice.
There is still a big gap between my cultivation status and the requirements of the Fa. I will continue to strictly require myself to be a true disciple of Master.