(Minghui.org) When reading Master’s poems, I felt that each and every character was touching my heart. I was shocked, especially by the words such as the creator, divine beings, atheism, and evolutionary theory.
It was as if my lost memory was being awakened. I heard a voice in my mind saying, “I was a divine being who has come down to this world.” It was a clear and simple thought. But, it reflected on my goal in life, and the significance of cultivation. It answered the three ultimate questions of mankind: “Who am I? Where do I come from? Where am I going?”
The reason I brought up the above is that I would like to talk about truly believing in the existence of divine beings. I think that the “not truly believing it” really obstructs one’s ability to cultivate.
One who does not believe can read the Fa daily, but not really understand it. One can do the Dafa exercises, but only do calisthenics, i.e., doing physical gymnastics. It could mean that a practitioner might not understand what cultivation is, and does not know how to cultivate – yet not realize.
The majority of Dafa practitioners have experienced the power of Dafa. Yet, many would be doing, yet not truly doing it – this is a problem given human notions.
When I thought about it with a calm mind, I had realized that in the past I did not have a clear idea about divine beings. It was very vague. A manifestation of this was that when studying the Fa, I felt it was so good and every sentence was so true; but once putting the book down and encountering issues in the real world, I did not have a practitioner’s mind, and often treated everything with human notions.
Another example was that when facing the persecution, even though I knew from the Fa that the evildoers were controlled by demons, but deep inside I still saw it as humans persecuting humans. What I had was not a true belief.
“To the great enlightened people, living as a human being is not the purpose, and one’s life is not meant for being human—it is meant for you to return to your origin. Human beings suffer a lot. The enlightened people think that the more one suffers, the better, as one should speed up repaying one’s debts. This is what they think.” (Lecture Four, Zhuan Falun)
However, I sometimes fought against sufferings intentionally or unintentionally. Isn’t this also a manifestation of not truly believing in the power of Dafa?
I was very fortunate that I was introduced to Dafa in 1996. However, I did not truly believe in it, and I even gave up cultivation for several years. But, Master did not give up on me. He still protected me, and gave me opportunities to start cultivation again.
When recalling the past, I asked myself, what made me suffer the persecution and what made me give up cultivation? What made me unable to cultivate like when I first started? What made me so scared of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP)? From my understanding, I think one important cause was that deep inside me I still didn’t truly believe in the existence of divine beings. The Buddha-nature inside me was still deeply buried by my human notions.
I grew up in a society that promoted atheism and evolutionary theory. From a very young age, given the indoctrination by the CCP, these concepts were instilled in me. When I first read Zhuan Falun, I was so excited and I just believed it. “Wow, divine beings truly exist!” At that time I really did believe that divine beings existed, and I really admired them. However, it was really just Master’s power and Dafa’s power.
My belief was limited to my feelings and I did not rationally understand it. My human notions did not change at all. They were merely frozen under the powerful external forces of the Fa, and thus they temporarily were not able to control my mind. I did not think about eliminating my fundamental attachments so it was not really cultivation in the true sense. Therefore, I was almost inevitably to be taken down by the old forces.
Of course, Master can change all these given his infinite wisdom, that is Master’s compassion. But I really experienced great losses and learned a big lesson. When I finally realized that I didn’t truly believe in the existence of divine beings, I asked myself why and how could I truly believe it. Partly there was interference from the thought karma, but I think there also had to be a process of truly thinking about it. So from then on, I really tried to study the Fa with my heart, instead of just reading. I started to study the Fa with a goal of becoming the high level being. I started to think about it and not being governed by any of my doubts. Gradually I began to see the deeper meanings in the Fa.
I think that not truly believing in the existence of divine beings is really a big problem and studying the Fa is the only way to break through it. Master has given us many examples to help us get through it. However, in the past when I read this type of Fa I only treated it as a kind of knowledge, and did not really treat it as the Fa. So I never paid enough attention to these examples.
Let us think about it: If we don’t truly believe in the existence of divine beings, then why would we be willing to suffer to become one of them? How would we have the motivation to cultivate and eliminate our attachments? How would we treat the white paper and black characters as the Fa and how would we have the reverence toward Master and the Fa?
If we are truly responsible for our cultivation, we should have the courage to ask ourselves if we truly believe in the existence of divine beings. If we realize there is any doubt, then we can focus on breaking through the doubts, and that will be the beginning to believing it. Through studying the Fa more and more, the result will be that we truly believe it from the bottom of our hearts.