(Minghui.org) Greetings, Master, and fellow practitioners:
I’ve been practicing Falun Dafa for eight years, and my understanding of cultivation kept changing. Given some recent tests, I attained a clearer understanding of the Fa, some gradually and some quickly. Some attachments that once were stubbornly clinging to me were resolved. And I know from my soul that Master bestows upon me these precious moments.
The proverb “the heart of looking down upon others” is often seen in practitioners’ sharing articles, the meaning of which is obvious. But why? Before, I was always sure that there are good reasons for that, thinking myself as being rational and seeing both sides of the coin. Now I understand that it weakens my cultivation.
When I see someone is being inconsiderate or rude, a thought would merge: “How can this guy be like this?” Then a thought follows: “Let it go, just cultivate. Then, I remain silent and leave. I once thought by doing so is to practice cultivation. I only realized recently that I wasted many chances for me to cultivate compassion. Compassion is not imagined, but truly practiced. The peace and calmness in my tone, the good faith shown from my appearance, the sincerity of standing in other people’s shoes, the awareness of discarding that selfishness, and so on – all these qualities are developed from and tested through interaction with people.
When I see improper behavior, and behavior that may make Dafa practitioners look bad in ordinary people’s eyes, is my silence truly for cultivating myself? If I really can look at it without seeing it, how can I possibly be judgmental and feel uncomfortable? Do I use “cultivate myself” as an excuse, and in fact nourish the bad substance of self-protection, selfishness and cunning? After many years, I can finally remind myself that everything that happens around me is a mere reflection of the bad substance in my own field. It is waiting for me to find and eliminate it.
Irritation came soon after: I felt that flash of an uncomfortable feeling, but could not find what attachment aroused it. I talked about it with practitioners, they told me that I should improve my xinxing, that I should let go of ordinary human attachments, I should simply ignore it, so on and so forth. I thought about that myself too, and it felt right but was still indeterminate.
Then one day, a practitioner pointed out that I may lack compassion. I felt brightened and could not agree more. I could never think of myself as being compassionate, but I should cultivate compassion via every thought and every interaction with people. The practice is mutually beneficial, since I practice compassion and at the same time, help others. That is so nice! And I think to myself after the conversation, are those superficial amiabilities also a certain level of compassion?
Master said:
“Dafa is in perfect harmony: If one separates the three characters of “Zhen-Shan-Ren,” each still fully contains Zhen-Shan-Ren. This is because matter is composed of microscopic matter, which is in turn made up of even more microscopic matter—this goes on and on until the end. Therefore, Zhen consists of Zhen-Shan-Ren, Shan consists of Zhen-Shan-Ren, and Ren also consists of Zhen-Shan-Ren.” (“A Brief Explanation of Shan,” Essentials of Further Advancement)
I enlightened to the fact that Shan without Zhen, is not real Shan.
Master also said: “Our Falun Dafa is based upon the highest standard of the universe, Zhen, Shan, and Ren, all of which we cultivate simultaneously. The system that we cultivate is enormous.” (Lecture One, Zhuan Falun)
I felt, at that very moment, an unspeakable magnificence and felt myself touch upon the wonder of creation. The words “Zhen, Shan, Ren,” … “simultaneously”…seem to lighten anything and everything inside of me, and also was connected with me. How I wished that light could last, thus I could treat all beings with compassion. Meanwhile, I knew that it was from Master, not from my own cultivation. Only by practicing cultivation myself, can it be mine.
The three things for a Dafa Disciple are more than clear. The everyday news tells us the change of this human world brought by Fa-rectification goes beyond the measurement of day. The time is up, and people are awakening. I’d like to share with you some impressive reactions I got when collecting signatures and when teaching the exercises.
A man was listening attentively for the purpose of signature collection and the introduction of Dafa. Then, he suddenly interrupted me and said: “Ah, I hear Communist, I will definitely sign.” And some told me that they came to Canada from Communist countries, no need to say more, they will sign absolutely. And there are often people encouraging me: “You are doing the right thing. Keep up your good work.” Everyone can see from those everyday people’s behavior that the evil communist specter is being disintegrated and eliminated rapidly. Some people asked sincerely how to donate to Dafa after learning about the persecution.
I see myself walking through the crowd, talking to people, clarifying the truth about Dafa, and listening to their feedback; I see that people are truly awakening, and are coming for Dafa. Those reactions and scenes calm my heart.
The presentation of the Buddha-nature and the good of human nature dilute the difference of customs, appearances, cultures and languages. The joy of connecting with Dafa becomes their universal language. I am honestly thankful to these people. There is no need for any deliberate glorification, they already presented me with the beauty from the depth of life. This, to some extent, makes it easier to eliminate a strong attachment – the attachment of questioning the meaning of life and the following bewilderment of practicing cultivation itself.
Zhuan Falun – Book by the Divine
I obtained the Fa because I was moved by Master’s Fa teachings. When I was reading Zhuan Falun, a simple sentence suddenly touched me and I was moved to tears. Therefore, I was a hundred percent sure that it was a divine being, not a human, who wrote this book, because the degree of benevolence is far beyond the human level. I chose to practice Falun Dafa. Meanwhile I knew clearly that it is not practitioners that choose Dafa, but Dafa who chooses practitioners.
However, the question of the purpose of the existence of life was still there. Master makes clear what is one’s origin and destination of life. Master also tells us about the creation of the primitive lives, but my question never fades, and I dare not ask.
Question, “Why are beings produced in the cosmos?”
Master said,
“Just as microorganisms cannot use their ways of thinking to understand human beings, the human mind will never be able to figure out the way gods exist and think. Human beings don’t even understand the cosmos, and they have no idea what it’s like, so how could they ask about things in the cosmos? This question amounts to asking, “Why should the universe exist?” Let’s not concern ourselves with why there’s a cosmos or why there’s life, because these aren’t things you can or should know. Even when you’ve cultivated to a high level, no matter how high it is, these are not things you will know. Of course, it would be meaningless to create an empty cosmos without life or anything in it, wouldn’t it? Using human words, it was the Lord (King of Kings), or, the Venerable Lord of all Buddhas, Daos, and Gods in oneness, who wanted it this way.” (Teaching the Fa at the Eastern U.S. Fa Conference)
I know that my bewilderment is not right, it is not myself, but I still have trouble to break through it, and it has lingered in my field for years and years.
One day, this so-called question came back to me again. My thinking was so chaotic, that I decided to take a walk. The flowers were blooming, and the trees added a lively green color. As I was walking and observing, a word appeared in my mind: “Life.” I knew it was Master. I felt guilty, and apologized: Master: “Master, I am sorry.
Not long after that, Master clearly lectured: “We often talk about “cultivation.” But what does it really mean? Few people really know, in fact. “Cultivation” is the perfection and fulfillment of a being.” (“Teaching the Fa in Washington D.C. in 2018”)
I was thinking then: “Oh, Master told me this already.” Despite this, my cultivation state went up and down. I knew the danger, if I do not change this, I would be murdered by the old force’s blunt knife little by little.
Maybe the time came for it to mature. Finally, the day came. I sent out a serious thought: “These questions cannot come to me again. I know they are not mine; they are yours. If you do not interfere with those corrupted thoughts, then you will have a chance of a benevolent resolution. If you dare to come again, I will classify you as evil and disintegrate you completely. My Gong is ready to do so any time. Righteous thoughts are powerful.” Of course, after this, those so-called questions, passive substances, and inexplainable sorrow were greatly diminished, and later completely disappeared. The righteous belief of Dafa from the true nature dominates.
The reason to say that the time came to its maturity is that I had been through quite a process to reach that thought. During the process, I have some impressive stories to share with you. I will tell them in chronological order:
It was not long after I attained the Fa. Once I was sitting in meditation, but could not achieve peace of mind. Various thoughts flew around in my mind, and became crazier. My thoughts then answered these thoughts and got kidnapped. Suddenly I heard Master’s voice from high above: “Your Main Consciousness Should Predominate!” I felt an earthquake inside of me, and immediately could take control of my mind.
Years after I started practicing, some things I saw and experienced made me feel sad. And the feeling of depression and repulsion grew. During that time, I set a rule for myself, there is “Only Master, Only the Fa”. I rely on this rule and counted the days. Master helped me by sending a practitioner to me who shared her experience. I was greatly encouraged, and after the conversation, I sat, calmed down, and sent forth righteous thoughts to clean my own field. In less than 15 minutes, I saw with my closed eyes that lumps of black substances squeezed out of my pores and dissolved. The scene was so clear and real, as if it happened right in front of my eyes. After sending righteous thoughts, I felt much lighter physically and mentally. I saw once again: it is so important to distinguish foreign interference from my true self.
Thought karma is powerful, and it can be tricky. I experienced that myself. Many times, I thought it was me who was thinking, but it was thought karma, which took me into confusion or chaos. One day, I made up my mind to eliminate thought karma. How could I do it? I did this by memorizing Master’s lecture.
I remember that was a Thursday, and I used every time-slot available to repeat Master’s lecture “Your Main Consciousness Should Predominate” (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun), and sent out righteous thoughts more frequently to remove thought karma. I was still doing so the next day before group Fa study.
I went to group the Fa study venue a little earlier that day, so I sat down and sent forth righteous thoughts to clear the thought karma. Two practitioners arrived and began tidying their plastic bags and talking loudly with me in between. I was in a state of emptiness with a conscious mind, and I felt myself separated from the noise around me. I knew that I was doing the right thing. On the way home, I continued reciting the Fa and when in bed before going to sleep, I continued repeating the Fa.
Then something happened that I will never forget.
I was reciting “Your Main Consciousness Should Predominate” from Zhuan Falun in my mind. When I was reciting “Most people, however, can remove and resist it with very strong thoughts from themselves (a strong Main Consciousness)”, a super clear voice from within me followed “Isn’t it enough?” I was shocked. The voice was not mine; it wasn’t a female sound. It was the voice of a man, but it came clearly from inside of my head. And the voice sounded old, scared, hopeless yet reluctant to give up, and struggled in a cunning way. I collected myself and realized that it was thought karma. Ah, you finally cannot stand it and reveal yourself. Come on, it is you that I am to eliminate. I continued reciting the Fa until I fell asleep. That was the only occasion that I actually connected with thought karma as a life form in my field, and experienced vividly how it tried to pretend to be me and control me.
For a long time after that, I still felt shocked whenever I thought of this. The human flesh body is so weak, so countless bad things can interfere. Some of them do so in an imperceptibly slow manner. If the main consciousness fails to predominate, it can be really hard.
Ever since then, I deliberately cultivate from the words I use. Here are some examples: I am aware enough not to say things like “my attachments”, because those attachments are foreign corrupted substances, not me. I do not say things like “sickness test”. How can it be “sickness”? Everything is a xinxing test. I also avoid terms like “senior practitioners” or “young practitioners”, because I see again and again the human notions attached to these labels. If I argue or resist, I am trapped by the old forces. However, sometimes it is hard to find a substitute which does not trigger human notions, so the only thing I do is not to respond and send a thought not to admit it. These tests of whether my first thought is on the human level or on the Fa always exists. The simpler the days, the more I feel the seriousness of Master’s lecture on cultivating every single thought.
“Accomplishing is cultivating.” (“Solid Cultivation,” Hong Yin) It is all too easy to say. “Accomplishing is cultivating.” Having been through all these, I finally sent that clear thought that day and it worked pretty well.
Looking back at this process, I thought to myself: “back and forth, ups and downs, finally we go back to where we came from, that is an unconditional belief in Master and the Fa with an obedient and humble heart.” At the end of this sharing, please allow me to read again the opening of Master’s On Dafa:
“Dafa is the wisdom of the Creator. It is the bedrock of creation, what the heavens, earth, and universe are built upon. It encompasses all things, from the utmost minuscule to the vastest of the vast, while manifesting differently at each of the cosmic body’s planes of existence.” (On Dafa, Essentials for Further Advancement)
(Presented at the 2019 Canada Fa Conference)