(Minghui.org) I am not yet 20 years old and have been practicing Falun Dafa since late 2017. The changes in my mind and body are tremendous. I have experienced how difficult it is to discover deeply hidden attachments unless I persist in studying the Fa.
From the day I decided to practice Falun Dafa, I’ve studied at least one lecture in the book Zhuan Falun every day. Master emphasizes the importance of Fa study, so I made up my mind to study the Fa every day. Before I practiced Falun Dafa, I was attracted to everything in society. I know that if I don’t study the Fa every day, I will not able to retain the Fa.
I used to have bad habits of smoking, drinking, and taking drugs. Soon after I began to practice Falun Dafa, all of my bad habits completely disappeared. My mind became clear and filled with righteous thoughts. I let go of many Chinese Communist Party (CCP) culture concepts I had. Whenever I become obsessed with something, I am able to discover and eliminate my attachment by studying the Fa.
When Sound of Hope Radio needed a Mandarin news broadcast anchor, I volunteered. There was once a problem with the audio file while I was recording. I panicked. I asked my father, who was in the studio, for help. He couldn't figure it out, either. I broke out in a cold sweat and was extremely anxious.
I was mumbling to myself, “What should I do?” My father asked me why I was so panicked. He said, “You are not acting like a Dafa practitioner.” I was unhappy with his comment but said, “I am afraid of being criticized.”
I realized that I needed to look inward to find my attachment. I found that the root of my fear was in my childhood, when I was going to school in China. Teachers, under the influence of the CCP culture, educated us in a way that degraded our motivation and enthusiasm. We were in constant fear of doing something wrong and being punished.
When I realized my attachment, I recalled Master's lecture in Zhuan Falun:
“He thinks that he has cured an illness. When others call him a qigong master, he will become delighted and very pleased. Isn’t that an attachment? When he cannot cure an illness, he drops his head and feels fizzled out. Isn’t it caused by his attachment to fame and personal gain?”
I had the attachment of seeking fame and reputation. I disliked it when others commented on my shortcomings. The root of my attachment was actually fear. Because I practice Falun Dafa, I should not look at problems on the surface, but look instead for the root cause.
As a new practitioner, time is urgent and must be used well. I must cultivate myself thoroughly while saving sentient beings. Though I am young, I am a Dafa disciple of the Fa-rectification period. I must fulfill my great responsibility. I must validate Dafa and cultivate myself well in all situations.
I had a serious fear of crowds. I feared the subway because there were so many people, and I was panicked when riding in a crowded train. After taking up Falun Dafa, I decided to go to Times Square, which has more traffic than anywhere else in New York. Demonstrating the Falun Dafa exercises there is like being on a stage. There are many people watching. I was in a panic the first time I went there. I tried hard to overcome my fear while I stood there preparing to start the exercises. Everything fell quiet and I became peaceful. I felt that I was growing bigger and bigger as I overcame my fear. Demonstrating the exercises in Times Square helped me overcome my long-held attachment of fear.
Please correct me if anything in my sharing is unsuitable.