(Minghui.org) In my 21 years of Falun Dafa cultivation, I have always regarded myself as a diligent practitioner. I have managed to overcome many tests and tribulations and have not had any major sickness karma.
My job requires me to read a lot on the computer and a cell phone. Recently, my eyes became red and swollen, and I wasn't able to read.
My first thought was that I had read too many everyday people's things that were causing me to be interfered with by evil spirits. I sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate them and asked Master to help me get a new job.
My eyes continued to worsen over the next two days, and my colleagues recommended that I see a doctor.
I kept telling myself to deny the old forces' arrangements and that, because I am a Dafa practitioner, no one has the right to test me.
I had to find the root cause of my eye problem. I remembered a Chinese proverb that says, “The eyes are windows to the heart.”
Did my eye problem reflect a problem in my heart?
“For a cultivator, looking within is a magical tool.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2009 Washington DC International Fa Conference”)
I began to seriously look within and finally realized that I often despised my husband. He is also a Falun Dafa practitioner, but I don't think he is diligent and I think he doesn't meet the standard of the Fa in many areas.
I also found that I despised a colleague who has poor morals and willingly became a rich man's mistress.
Despising other people is also a heart of jealousy. We usually label a person as being jealous if he or she thinks that someone else is better off than they are. But my contempt for other people is also a manifestation of jealousy, because I was comparing myself to them.
I was quite shocked when I discovered this jealousy, because I had always regarded myself as a good practitioner and had often scorned other practitioners and ordinary people for harboring this behavior.
I understood that my eye problem was rooted in my “dirty” heart.
I called out to Master, saying that I didn't want this jealousy and begged Master to help me get rid of it. A few minutes later, my eyes stopped hurting.
The redness and swelling even disappeared after a nights’ sleep.