(Minghui.org) Cultivation is complicated. I would like to list some conflicts I have had with a coordinator during the past few years. I did not have a clear understanding of things until recently.
I have been involved with Shen Yun promotion since 2007, and I had always worked on the same project. I enjoyed this project very much because I was always able to see Master.
I was very excited and considered it an opportunity arranged by Master. However, my mood often went up and down. I was very happy when I was able to see Master, and I was disappointed when I could not.
When I was not able to see Master, I thought that it was a result of either me or the team not having done well.
Basically, I was considering things based on my attachment of wanting to see Master.
After a number of years passed, with logistics in place, our local coordinator told me to stop working on the specific project I had been working on and gave me other assignments.
I was not happy at all. I thought that the new responsibilities did not fit me well, and even more upsetting, the chance to see Master was gone.
When I thought about other things that the coordinator had done in the past that I did not like, my complaints grew worse.
Nonetheless, I knew it was a tribulation for me to overcome, and I knew I should follow the coordinator unconditionally. Little by little, I realized that the assignments I did not like were still very important, so I decided to do better.
During the 2015 Shen Yun tour, due to unexpected reasons, I was temporarily assigned to my old project, and was able to meet Master again. This helped me recognize more attachments within myself, and I began improving in those areas.
When the 2016 tour came, I was told to do the same thing again. With a sincere and pure attitude, I concentrated on how to do things better, and was no longer attached to whether or not I could see Master.
Like many other practitioners, I worked very hard. Feeling tired, I knew I needed to do the exercises more frequently.
I started to set aside some time to do the five sets of exercises more often. When doing the meditation, I was in tears because I could tell Master was always around me.
Another practitioner shared with me that it is not the physical distance between us and Master that matters, it is whether or not we do well as Dafa disciples. After all, Master is always around taking care of us.
On the following day, one practitioner said I could not see Master this time. I was in tears again—not due to disappointment, but from warmth and a sense of responsibility.
I felt as if I had gone back to an ancient war, in which I was a general directing the battles. The emperor trusted me very much and thus did not need to make a personal visit.
In my mind I said, “Master, please do not worry about it. I will take good care of these [responsibilities associated with Shen Yun].” By then, I had a feeling of sacredness and mighty power.
Several days after the Shen Yun tour passed, the coordinator called me and asked me about my involvement of Shen Yun in the past two years. I had lots of thoughts to share, but did not know where to start.
Before I was able to respond, the coordinator interrupted me, “How about you lead this project from now on?”
I was surprised and could not believe my ears. Two years earlier, the same coordinator had prohibited me from core activities, and as a result, I was satisfied to help with trivial matters.
Why was I suddenly given such a major responsibility?
As we talked further, I realized this was my mission, and I needed to do it well. I said to the coordinator, “No problem, you can count me on it.”
In my mind, I knew it was also a promise to Master.
When further studying the Fa and reviewing my experiences during the past few years, I came to understand that it was actually not the coordinator, but gods prohibiting me from participating in the project. All these issues arose because of my attachments and impure heart.
Once I improved, my situation changed naturally.
There may be many conflicts between practitioners during cultivation practice, and if we approach these things with human notions, they may be very difficult to overcome.
However, if we treat ourselves as Dafa disciples, and always think of how we can do better, we will be able to make breakthroughs.
This is part of our cultivation, and it is a requirement for us from Master. When we have pure minds, our words will be more effective and powerful when we tell others about Falun Gong and the persecution in China.
In the Fa lectures, Master has talked about the history of the earth in the past 200 million years. If 5,000 years is the period of time for one civilization, that means about 40,000 civilizations have come and gone in history. Let us look at the big picture, be clear on what we are doing, and fulfill our mission.