(Minghui.org) Several practitioners whom I'm very close to were arrested on the same day. I had a conversation with one of them a few hours before their arrest. When I heard the news, I felt dark clouds over my head and I was surrounded by dark matter. I was afraid to go home and was petrified that the police would break into my house and arrest me.
I eventually did go home, but my reaction to the practitioners' arrests made me realize that I still had the attachment of fear.
I looked inward and noticed that I also had a lustful heart. Sometimes I would go along with the attachment and harbor improper thoughts. I knew about my problems, but didn't really want to rectify them. I was also attached to the pursuit of profit, fame and reputation. I was resentful and didn't like others criticizing me. Once I discovered these attachments, I said to Master: “I'm sorry Master. I know about my attachments and mistakes, but I haven't really cultivated myself to get rid of them.”
The field around my body didn't clear up after I looked inward. There were still bad elements pressing down on me. I realized something was wrong. Apparently, I had not found the problem's root cause.
Right then, Master enlightened me about “self.” I sensed that my apologies to Master did not come from my heart. I didn't want to rectify myself based on the Fa. I thought I could avoid the persecution by apologizing to Master instead. I went through the motions of looking inward to avoid being persecuted. I was focusing on myself and being selfish.
I burst into tears when I became aware of this. The field surrounding me all of a sudden cleared up. I saw some of the old force beings start to retreat. I sent forth righteous thoughts to disintegrate the rest of the old force beings. The energy emitted by my palm was very strong and my body felt light and pure.
Thank you, Compassionate Master! Practitioners, please kindly point out anything inappropriate.